my mother in law??

Question

Is always complaining to me about how they have no money
But to me they seem to waste a lot.
And if her Hubby wants something he gets it
For example they have 4 computer because he wanted them.
I want her to stop telling me this because they really don't have a whole lot to spare but they aren't as broke as she makes it seem
How do I tell her nicely that I don't want to hear this all the time

Answer 1

Either you or probably you husband should tell her in the "nicest" way possible that you are not comfortable hearing about her money problems. If that does not work give her the number of the Consumer Credit Counselors and tell her to quit criping and do something about it.

Answer 2

Maybe your missing an angel here..your mother in law may see how well you and her son are doing and she is looking for ideas on how to save money. She may feel to embarrassed to just come out an ask you how you do it , so she tells you how much she would like to have something or do something but there just doesnt seem to be enough money to do that.
I was left wondering something from your question even though you didnt say it..is it possible that you and your husband borrowed some money for them and instead of asking for the money back she keeps letting you know that they are having some troubles with money hoping you might repay her?? I may be in left field here but if Im not..just pay her back the money and learn that you never borrow money from family or friends.

Answer 3

Usually we don't want to hear people complaining because it bothers us. And understandably, you don't want to, and have a right to, not be bothered. However, rather than trying to change her behaviour (if she doesn't know that its impolite by now, she probably never will) make a decision to change your reaction to her behaviour. Just decide that she can say whatever she want to, it does not matter to you. Respond with, "sorry to hear that," "that's nice", "life can be difficult", etc., or no response at all. Sometimes people say things just to say them, they don't always look for a response.

As long as she is not harrass you for help, loans, etc. I think it is better to let it be. If it is difficult now, just think how difficult she will be once she is ticked off because your "corrected" her.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Ask her do they really need 4 computers, and say that if I were that hard up I would sell at least 2 of them, or smile and say yeah mum, tell me about it I don't know how I'm going to get through the rest of the month.

Answer 5

Just politely change the subject every time she starts complaining. Say "ok" and then move on to a new topic.

She will not get the feedback she wants and will soon stop bothering you.
Good luck

Answer 6

Look its your husbands family. Let them be. who cares alot of people complain about money. is it really hurting you to listen to her talk.
I think there are more important issues. why create a hostile environment with her.
just smile and let her complain or place a very kind coment like when she says oh boy we are so tight this week.....well mom in law you can always sell 3 of your computer to make ends meet.............

Answer 7

Uh, how to put it to her nicely?

Obvioulsy she sees you as her outlet to b|tch and complain about nothing.

Next time she brings this sorta thing up, stop her, and tell her that you dont want to hear it, or hear about it. Start of by saying, "I dont mean to be disrespectful, but..."

Someone like her, there is no nice way to put anything, you just gotta go on and tell them.

Answer 8

Next time she whines about having no money, tell her to sell one of the computers. I have a relative like this & just tell her straight out that she's full of crap. If you start questioning things, she'll stop.

Answer 9

Tell her that you understand and then change the subject.As long as you guys aren't asking her for money then there's no problem.

Answer 10

Point out to her the waste of money and she should get your point to shut up.