My husband and I were trying to get pregnant. I am pretty sure I am fertile. But I wanted that baby so badly. My husband wanted it to. He is handling it very well. But I cry almost every night. It happened about 3 months ago. I don't know how to handle losing my baby. Please tell me how.
2006-09-07 05:55:06 · 16 answers · asked by boxers_r_us2006 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
It's going to take time. I lost a pregnancy at 7 weeks and I was devasted for a long time too. About a year later, I found out I was pregnant again. Do not lose hope, but do greive your loss for as long as you need to. If you need support, there are groups in your area and even on-line. Do something to memorialize your baby. It's okay to move on and enjoy life.
2006-09-07 06:02:42 · answer #1 · answered by every1lovesamixedgirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all I'm very sorry for what you've gone through.
If you're still having this much pain, there is no shame in going to see a counselor who can help you cope. Try again when you feel ready, but don't let anyone let you feel like conceiving again would be "replacing" the baby that was lost...I believe that baby was an individual with a soul from the time he or she was conceived, and there is nothing wrong with grieving for him or her...and acknowledging that just making another baby to stand in this one's place won't necessarily take the pain away. Just take care that you're not so focused on the baby that was lost that you forget to find love and joy in the one(s) I'm sure you'll eventually have.
I've heard some people say that doing something lasting to honor the lost pregnancy is healing...like planting a tree, or publishing a poem, or something like that.
Last, MANY MANY women have lovely, healthy babies after miscarriages, don't give up hope! Best wishes!
2006-09-07 08:11:55 · answer #2 · answered by p.helen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I lost a baby just a month before I got pregnant with my daughter and I was hysterical. I blamed myself because I didn't know I was pregnant so I wasn't taking care of myself the way that I should have. My doctor told me that when you lose a baby, it isn't because you did anything wrong. Miscarriages can be caused by infection or it can be caused by the egg not attaching to the uterus correctly. It doesn't put out the hormones it takes to keep you from having a period, which miscarries the baby. Look at it like if the baby would have been carried to full term, it probably would have had severe birth defects. Just because you lost one, doesn't mean you can't try for another one. You are actually more fertile right after a pregnancy. Good luck with trying it again!
2006-09-07 06:13:37 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oooooooooooo, that's bad-and sad. well most ppl who end up broken hearted like you and ur husband, try to deal with it by trying to have one again or they adopt one. i mean u do want one so badly. many ppl know how u feel probably. i have a friend whose mother got pregnate 6 times. the first 4 times all of the babies died. the last two, the friend and her sis came out good healthy and alive. don't worry it is not the end of the world and there's always another door to a new life. just take a deep breath and go on. maybe u can go and take a class of how to deal with loss.in just a few monthes or perhaps years (hopefully only one or two) maybe a very joyful and happy baby will enter ur life and stay forever as ur child.
2006-09-07 06:05:32 · answer #4 · answered by bookworm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep your friends and family close to you now. They will be there for you and provide alot of comfort and emotional support. Maybe you should find a counselor in your area who you can talk to. That may help also. I am so sorry for your loss and I hope that in time the pain will lessen. Take comfort in the knowledge that when you and your husband finally do have your first born child you will build many happy memories and love with him or her. Even though you have suffered a painful loss now and that child can never be replaced, your future son or daughter will bring you much happiness.
2006-09-07 06:06:42 · answer #5 · answered by Justme 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear that. Sometimes life just deals you a tough card. You have to be strong. The good thing about it is that at least you know you are physically capable of getting pregnant, there are lots of women who just can't. You cannot change what has happened already. Think about your future, bring up your courage and try again. Soon you'll have a bundle of joy in your arms.
BTW, miscarriages are more common than you think. 1/2 the time they don't even know it, esp. if they weren't trying to conceive.
2006-09-07 06:02:12 · answer #6 · answered by mom_of_ndm 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will get better, trust me. I went through the same thing and I never thought the pain would stop. I'm sure you're still trying to get pregnant and when you do, the pain will subside. You'll have a beautiful baby and you'll know it was supposed to be this way.
You'll probably always wonder "what if", but remember--everything happens for a reason.
You're in my thoughts!
2006-09-07 06:01:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry. You must look forward to the wonderful healthy baby you will have. I'm sure that the Dr. told you that the miscarriage was probably caused by a serious defect and it was best that it happened early. The next time you will do fine. Believe it.
2006-09-07 06:18:42 · answer #8 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is hard but after three months you should move on. Don't hate me for saying that I know you will never forget but if it is impacting your life still you need professional help to work through this depression before other things - such as your relationship with your husband- begin to suffer. I'm sorry for your loss and wish you the best of luck.
2006-09-07 06:01:03 · answer #9 · answered by pebble 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I too lost three different pregnancy's and it hurts everytime, my husband and I now have a five year old boy, so stick with it. It will always hurt to lose and I am sorry for your loss.
2006-09-07 06:02:36 · answer #10 · answered by Celeste P 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋