Why are some people frightened of silence?

Question

My daughter ,13, jabbers like an idiot because I think she's afraid of silence. Any ideas why????

Lets get this straight.
I don't call ANY of my kids idiots.
I wrote she 'jabbers LIKE an idiot'.
She is actually a very bright kid.
She has only been living with my family and myself for 1 month.
I admit I dont have much experience in dealing with teenage daughters.
And the reason why I asked the question is because I care.
She starts at a new school next week and I would hate it if her fellow pupils thought she was an 'blabbering idiot'.

Answer 1

consider yourself lucky... i've got gfs who jabber ALL the time.

Answer 2

I remember when I was a girl I had times of 'jabbering' and I think it was a very active mind talking to the universe to see what/who would answer. I was also a reader and enjoyed being able to create my own silence regardless of the noise around me. I do know some people who do fear silence to the point that they'd rather listen to a stupid commercial than use the mute button. The reason for this is fear of their own thoughts and some people are even neurotic or psychotic. If your daughter seems like she's behaving obsessively,really unable to control herself then as with any disconnect with reality you should give her the opportunity to talk to a professional. Otherwise, don't label her as an idiot, try listening more closely, she's only 13- believe me the day will come when you wish she would talk to you if you shut her out now. Maybe she could make use of a creative outlet like writing or composing?

Answer 3

Most 13 yr old girls just jabber because that is there natural speed. I have one too. My 15 yr old finally grew out of this.

As for your question, I have a theory. I think most people are not comfortable within themselves. They do not like to reflect on their life (past, present, and future). If a person is not comfortable inside themselves, that silence can be deafening.

There is a test that similar to that:
Picture yourself in a room with no windows or doors. All of the walls are white. There is a chair in the middle of the room.

How do you feel?

There is no correct answer. But whatever feeling this evokes is supposed to be how you feel about death.

In my experience, however we feel about death, is how we feel about life.

Carpe Diem. Sieze the moment. We do not know when we are to die. Live every day as if you are to die tommorrow, that way you will never have regrets.

God Bless,
Vic

Answer 4

Absense of noise requires more thought and reflection on your own part. If she is indeed frightened of silence I would suggest that she doesn't like her own company. Perhaps try requesting silence sometimes in a kind way- can I concentrate for a minute? Can you hear those birds? etc, or just explain that you need a break occasionally, ensure that you do listen to her when she is talking, and encourage her to talk about things that bother her, is she a confident person? Make sure she gets plenty of encouragement and praise for her achievements, you might be able to ask her yourself what she thinks, it depends on your relationship with her.

Answer 5

I think that is normal for kids from the time the learn to talk until they gets involved with a crush.. will change everything.

Silence can be taught to her anyway, that every person no matter the age needs some kind of silence to themselves and listen to their heart beats, or their pulse or just listen to their thoughts.

You can encourage her to do that just before sleeping But there is nothing to worry about her. Talking to her like an adult may lessen that.

Answer 6

Maybe the fact that you call her an 'idiot' has led to her having issues with confidence and she feels that she has to appear interesting and/or knowledgeable to get your approval?

I believe it is common for teenagers to behave like this - puberty has kicked in, their hormones are all over the place and they want to be accepted. If I was you I'd be thankful I have a chatty, outgoing daughter, rather than a sullen teen who grunts at you and considers you pointless (eg Kevin from Harry Enfield!)

Answer 7

I dont like silence, I find it deafening. I don't have tinnitus but I do find true silence quite uncomfortable. I always have to have music or tv on. I dont think your daughter is actually afraid of silence but more worried about not being interesting. Very often teenagers will gabber on about all and anything just to keep your attention.

Answer 8

I've wondered this myself. I think that maybe people like this think it's improper not to talk to someone and so they fill the silence instead of just letting it be. I think it's a communication problem, as in they don't know the proper way to turn off the chatter when there's nothing to say, they just keep going.

Answer 9

Lots of people are. If there is silence, they think that means that they have nothing interesting to say. They can't stand the thought of being uninteresting or boring, so thiey find something to talk about constantly.

Answer 10

Is she? Did you ask her?

I had a friend in school who talked non-stop. Some people just do that, because they're high strung and very nervous. Also, she had very low self esteem and felt like she had to always entertain people... which she wasn't really doing, just annoying us most of the time...

.

Answer 11

It's just creepy. I always have to have background noise when I am doing something. Like if the TV or radio isn't on I get nervous. I think white noise is comforting.