This is not a question but I would like to hear sincere comments please.?

Question

I feel ashamed to say this but here goes. My mother is in her mid 50's & has had polio in her 1 leg from birth. She wore a brace on her leg for most of her childhood & teen life until she became an adult & learned to walk unaided. Due to the strain in her other leg, her hip joint wore out & needed a full replacement. To this day she suffers from this horrible dissability but her personality draws people to her like a moth to a flame. Apart from all of that, she suffers from a skin disease called psoraisis along with other illnesses. I still live at home with my folks at the age of 26 and I lover my mom with all my heart. She does everything for me despite my lazy habits.

I feel ashamed that I never tell my mother that I love her & I fear that she may die having never heard those words from my mouth. I have tried but its just too hard. I need her to know that I love her without having to say it.

If you have sarcasm towards this, please save it. Rather just say 2points & move on.

Answer 1

You could be writing about me. I am 53 have suffered from psoraisis (which is an auto immune disease, which probaby has a connection her polio) since my kids were 5. I had a stroke in Aoril that effects my right side. My daughter is 23 lives at home, and my other daughter who married in June, just moved last weekend after she, her now husband, his 11yr old daughter, two cats and a dog, had to move in last Jan.

The difference? Mine tell me and more importantly show me, they love me all the time.

There isn't any other way to say this, so I'll talk to you like you were my own child. You are 26, its time to grow up and be a man. I know you have heard that before, but something is holding you back to childhood and you need to figure out what. Please read on for some useful suggestions.

First of all, if you are not working, get a job, even a very small one. If you are working, then write your mom a check, even its its for 25.00, once a month. Its not the amount, its the act of being responsible.

Secondly, start being responsible for your personal habits. Learn to do your own laundry for instance. If your mom won't let you do that, then clean up the laundry area, wash off the washer and dryer, get her some new baskets or whatever she uses, do something that helps her. Do the same thing with everything you do, fixing your own food, using the bath/shower, the room you sleep in. Don't ask her, just quietly start doing these things.

3rd, put in writing how you feel. Men have a problem with this, so take it one step at a time. Get some post it notes and leave her little notes. Just say something simple, "thanks for everything, mom" "love you, mom!" "wow, you are great, mom". Put them in the kitchen, the bathroom, on the TV, any place you think she will see it.

I don't know if you have realised this yet, but you may wind up being your mothers care giver. It sounds like she has the arthritis that is associated with psoriosis, and she will just get worse. If she hasn't gotten into see a dermatologist about her psoriosis lately (I had given up too), she needs to go see about new changes in treatment. That will greatly improve her life, but it won't do much about you, you are going to have to do that.

I think your letter is very sincere, and I think you are grateful. While it is very hard for you to start, once you start telling her you love her and thank you, it will become easier and easier.

You don't want the first time you tell her that to be at her funeral where you are saying it to her dead face. Too many people forget that have the reward for telling someone thank you, is hearing them say you are welcome back. Give your mom that chance, she obviously loves you with all her heart.

Sorry about any mispellings, my spell checker isn't working, and I've not had enough coffee yet to be able to spell properly.

Good luck to you and get going, don't waste any time. Email me if you need a pep talk.

Answer 2

There is no need to feel ashamed. So you find it hard to express your love for her, but what you have written proves that you love her dearly and really appreciate her.

I am 27 and still live at home as my mum has Multiple Sclerosis. I feel, too, that i never tell her how much I love her, as we are not the kind of family who throws those kind of gestures around.

Your mum will already know that you love her without you having to say anything.

Why not get some flowers sent to her and write on the card how much you appreciate everything she does for you. That will be a lovely surprise for her.

Don't ever change ok? You are a genuinely nice, caring person, and I wish there were more people like you around. Take care.x

Answer 3

those that have sufferred are often the most generous to others and hence their popularity. As for her psoraisis, have suffered from this and some steroid creams work,but cut out white bread and asmuch wheat products as possible, not sure if the steroid cream of the diet changed help.

Why not get her a lovely Christmas card, or make one, along with a compliation of her favourite songs onto a CD, with maybe a song that expresses how you feel about you Mum, you could make up the album cover and next to the song, say "this says all what I can't put into words how I feel about you Mum"

Answer 4

Why don't you try writing it down, everything you want to say, how much she means to you in a nice card. Then when she's read it you can tell her it's true. It might be easier to say once she's read it.

I have had psoriasis since I was a child, luckily not anywhere obvious. Just last year I was told I had Psoriatic Arthritis because of it. I know how much of a disability it can be and how prejudiced society can be.

I am sure she is a lovely woman and will know herself that you love her just by being the way you are with her. But I'm sure it will make you feel better in your own heart if you told her.

Good luck x.

Answer 5

I know exactly what you mean. When you do not say the words for a long time (like since you were little) they become very big and will be a big deal when you say them. My mom died of cancer and I hadn't said those words to her enough before she went.

My suggestion is that you start out small, like give her cards for birthdays, Christmases, Easter even, and write "with all my love" and your name. Writing it is easier than saying it and will probably mean just as much to her.

You should really try this because I wish I had told my mother more often and now I don't have the chance. I won't tell you to "just say it" because I know it is too hard.

Plus, when you say it, it's gone right away. When you write it she can look at it as many times as she wants.

Answer 6

Im really sorry to hear about your poor mum.You sound like a lovely son and im sure that just by the small things you do for her she nos that you love her very much!There are lots of nice cards with beautiful words in at the moment,maybe go to a card shop and have a look through some of them,im sure there will be 1 that describes exactly how you feel about her,If not maybe you could make one yourself.
Good luck with this, i hope you are able to find the right way to tell her x

Answer 7

I have a disabled mother also .. I feel as though I should come and slap you upside your head .. "she does everything for me" .. what the hell dude !!! it should be the otherway around ..

You obviously realise how special she is and it seems to me that you owe her some SERIOUS payback.

Make her life easier for her ..do the cooking the washing whatever she needs .. make yourself a bonus not a burden.

bring some sunshine into her world .. take her out for the day, take her on holiday ..

And as for the love thing .. fella you are 26 years old and she needs to hear it! If you aint got the courage to tell her then buy her something and write the words, engrave the words, whatever but make sure she knows .. because she deserves it!

Good luck mate ;)

Answer 8

As the old saying goes actions speak louder than words. You obviously really respect and love your Mum and your Mum probably knows this. If she could see this question she would be very moved but you must stop being lazy and make every effort you can to communicate with her or you will regret it for the rest of your life. She needs to hear this as it could make her better in the long term - psoriasis is caused by stress alot of the time and you could help her by getting off your backside and doing things for her then tell her you love her - nothing is too hard.
Good luck!

Answer 9

In a way, it is a question. How do you show someone you love them, or tell them when it is difficult? Showing someone is easy. Give her a hug, if she asks why or why you did it, just say you wanted to. As far as saying you love her, here's my advice. If you say it once, it gets easier each time. Our time here is short, never miss an opportunity to tell people you love, family, friends, girlfriend etc...that you love them. You never know if you'll ever get the chance again.

I can identify with you. I'm 33 and my Mom came to stay with me for awhile. She has many medical problems and mental problems as well. I tell her I love her not as often as I should, as I'm ready for her to move on to a place of her own, but I tell her nonetheless when I feel the need, or she needs to hear it. People in general NEED to hear those words sometimes. And a hug goes a long way.

Again, try a few hugs then build yourself up to telling her that you love her. Once you do, it will get easier...plus you'll feel better and so will she.

Answer 10

I lost my mum last year, sounds like you and I share the same sentiments towards our mothers, mine also suffered for years. I have a friend who constantly swears at and berates his mother, I always remind him I would give a limb to swear at my mother.
My mother died, I had not seen her for over a month, the only thing that saves me from regrets is that I told her I was sorry for everything that I put her through, that I love her very much and am proud to be her son.
Mate, you will go to your grave haunted if your mum passes away without you telling her, even if you have to get drunk to do it (nike technology) just do it. There is not a day goes by 18 months after losing my mum that I do not feel pain but it is eased by what I said.
I hope you have many more happy years with your mum.