i have never been into the idea, until i visited a baby care centre yesterday where my friend dropped off her child for the day. i saw many cute kids and wondered if i should have one myself. yes i am aware of the hard work and finances involved. i mean, i am 32. how long should i leave it? advice from those with and without kids please!
2006-09-06 19:30:32 · 16 answers · asked by lisa s 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
I'm one Mom with 3 kids, and I say that's a really personal choice that I can't give you good advice on.
My experience as a mother is very challenging and very rewarding. I have become more enriched as a person with my experiences. And I enjoy every moment, even the hard parts.
You have not come to that age of menopause yet, you very well may have many, many more years to decide this question.
I would say talk to your partner, and go from there about perhaps doing a lot of overnight babysitting for your friend that has a small child or even a baby for a day or two in a row, meaning becoming 'pretend parents' for a day or two, see how it honestly affects your lifestyle that you have managed so far, if it feels comfortable, or something that you would really prefer not to do long term.
The world is yours, enjoy every moment, in any way you chose, whether that is beginning a family with children, or not.
2006-09-06 19:39:55 · answer #1 · answered by Craptacular Wonderment 6 · 6⤊ 10⤋
We can't tell you what you should or shouldn't do, but I can tell you my opinion and some facts. =)
As you pass the age of 35 your chances of carrying to full term decrease dramatically.
Having kids just because they're cute isn't a good reason. They're like puppies, they're totally adorable at first, but then they grow up into teenagers.
What does your partner think about being a parent? Are they open to the idea? Will they stick around once a baby shows up?
I'm 28 and on my 3rd and last baby. Like I said in another thread, I don't want to be receiving Medicare, or be a member of AARP when my kids are graduating high school. So I guess if I were in your position, I'd do it now.
2006-09-06 19:38:46 · answer #2 · answered by jenpeden 4 · 6⤊ 2⤋
This one is for you and your partner or no partner to decide you can't ask other s to decide for you. And just because you think kids are cute doesn't mean you should have one. You have to be willing to make a life long commitment. You have to be willing to protect and care for a child, to give it love and anything and everything that a child needs. Just because your 32 doesn't mean it's to late you really need to be understanding of everything that involves of taking care of a child, money can't be an issue to. I would get some books talk with your partner or family member if your on your own. Make sure you have a good support system. Good luck.
2006-09-06 19:41:54 · answer #3 · answered by medevilqueen 4 · 6⤊ 2⤋
Ok...so you said stable relationship...right? How stable, like you would marry this person stable? and if you married this person stable, do you think it would last for a long time, like for instance...life? Now that we have that question out of the way, how's the finances, the beliefe differences between you and your partner, how's the family life (i.e. your family liking him, and his family liking you)? Is your relationship ready for children, I know they are so cute, but there is a lot more preparation required for this process. You have made it to 32 and have been able to make sure you knew what you were doing before getting in too deep. Most people don't achieve this, you are doing great so far. But now you are deciding if this is something you want to do. Great, I only want to make sure the child is going to have every oppertunity available, because there is a lot out there, and no use in starting the kid's life up prematurly, too many people do that today. I know this sounds like a lecture, but you asked our opinions, and well I feel mine is as valid as the next. I would take everything in my life in to consideration, before placing another life (one I am responsible for the next 18 years, and it isn't mine) in to this world. Am i against having kids, NO WAY, but I am against a lot of people not having the resources available and not being responsible about having kids. So take it in to consideration, and remember, it is only my opinion, not yours.
2006-09-06 19:43:34 · answer #4 · answered by asmul8ed 5 · 6⤊ 2⤋
Yeah all babies are cute, especially when they have someone ELSE taking care of them 24/7...that is exactaly what having a baby is, a 24/7 job, at 32 I will "assume" you are woking? Ad the 24/7 to the hours you already work...that's how much LITTLE sleep you're going to get for the next 18 to 20 years...
2006-09-06 19:34:21 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 2⤋
Having children is the best thing in the world. If you think you are ready physically, emotionally and financially... I would say go for it! I dont think there is anything else more rewarding! I have two children.... but if you think that you are not a person that would be good... with everything.. Im talking diapers, crying, your house being a mess... etc... then dont consider it. Some people just arnt made to be parents. I would rather see someone say they arnt then have kids and find out... and those children suffer. But personally I love it and wouldnt trade it for anything else in the world.
2006-09-06 19:35:33 · answer #6 · answered by JustWondering 3 · 6⤊ 2⤋
Well you are already 32 and your just now asking yourself this question. Don't know you well enough to know if your ready now or will ever be. Only you know the answer, deep down I think you have decided. Ask yourself if your both ready. Are you both set in your ways or are you willing to change your present lifestyle. I felt the same way,chose not to have children and I am happy with my life. Good Luck and much happiness with each other no matter what you decide.Peace2U.
2006-09-06 20:00:59 · answer #7 · answered by psykobarbi 2 · 6⤊ 2⤋
That decision is entirely up to you. I am also nearing my 30s and in a very good relationship but I, together with my husband, decided to take things slow and enjoy each other`s company first. I love children and I know they are angels too. But there are still some factors we consider before having one (a stable job, financial considerations, etc). In due time and God-willing, we will!!!
2006-09-06 19:39:10 · answer #8 · answered by Joy RP 4 · 6⤊ 2⤋
It doesn't sound like your heart's really in it, so i'd wait a bit if I were you. But keep in mind that you want to be young and energetic enough to enjoy raising your kid. eg when your child is 10, you don't want to be like 50 or older, as it would be hard on you and probably not much fun for your son/daughter either.
2006-09-06 19:38:03 · answer #9 · answered by the_fatmanwalksalone 4 · 6⤊ 2⤋
Be married first, to provide a stable, loving family for a child to come into.
2006-09-07 00:33:45 · answer #10 · answered by Lydia 7 · 6⤊ 2⤋