i am suffering from inferiority complex for last few years. I shall be grateful if anyone could advise me?

Question

I am 29 yrs old and my height is 5 feet 3 inches. the structure of my face also doesnt look good enough; no girl likes me. quite often while talking to people, i feel i am not enought experienced or clever; i feel i am stupid. People say i have a smile of insecurity on my face all time. Please somebody advise me.

Answer 1

well, first, know that you're not alone in feeling like that. a lot of people here feel the same, as well as many famous people. just listen to some of morrissey's songs.

secondly - you should find someone to talk to. a therapist would be best, but friends are also definitely good. or, even, a stranger. you just need to build a better self-image, and see the good in you. I'm sure you have a lot to offer - you just have to put that out front.

Answer 2

I suppose being 5' 3" would have an effect on a man's ego. The structure of your face means nothing.

What is important is your attitude. If you truly believe that "no girl likes me", then that is what you will get.

Not long ago, I answered a question in Yahoo Answers. It was...

What makes a person attractive?

and my answer was...

For men?...

Charisma
Honesty
Charm
Confidence
Wit
Sense of Humor
Stability
Elegance
Quiet and Assured
A bit of a Scoundrel

My answer was chosen as the best. It says nothing about height, looks, or facial stucture. No physical attributes were mentioned.

If you can conquer your shyness and lack of confidence, your height will not matter. There is a woman for every man.
If you are uncertain about what to say, then remain silent. Quiet men appear to be wise, mysterious, and confident. It has a huge effect on women when a man remains silent and gazes into their eyes with confidence.

If you have a smile of insecurity on your face, it is because you are forcing a smile with your mouth, or lips. A real smile is done with the eyes. Learn to smile with your eyes. Practice in the mirror. Make your cheeks under your eyes come up, causing your eyes to squint into a smile. Your mouth will smile automatically. This is the method employed by professional models and celebrities. A smile looks insecure and fake when it is just the mouth.

Change the way you dress. When you are wearing something nice and sexy you feel confident and good about yourself. Break your own tradtions. Be daring. Try a style of clothing you never wore before.

You are the perfected end-product of God's selective evolution in your lineage. You are meant to be here. Learn to accept who you are. Embrace everything about yourself. Learn to love your height. Let your soul out. If you act 10 feet tall, that is how people will see you.

Answer 3

Know that your height means nothing in the modern age. Understand that looks mean almost nothing when your in a relationship thats good. Alot of girls out there do like you maybe you just havent met them yet or they are scared themselfs for reasons I couldnt explain. If you need experience talking with people the best way is to just go out and force yourself into the situations that scare you and own your fears. You might not seem clever to yourself but im sure other people will find you interesting and clever in your own way. If you feel stupid that does not mean you are stupid that just means someone has programed it into your mind and you can start the debugging process today by learning something new and accepting that we all have our limits on what we can and can not learn in a time frame. I dont hardly any facial expressions at all cause of my schizophenia and I can tell you this much if someone looks down on you because of the way your face looks its them at fault not you. I always get people asking if im doing ok and if im happy because I dont smile but what these people dont know is im probably one of the happyest people on the face of the earth... or at least I would like to think so. :) Basicaly its all in your mind find a way to let go of control while keeping it and you will have your questions and answers. Take risks sometimes they can pay off big time.

Answer 4

I think that you have unexpectedly taken on a negative self image that comes from your observation of what people find attractive or pleasant. From your description, you've basically described yourself as short, ugly, and a bad conversationalist. All qualities that society says are bad or unattractive Unfortunately people (since the majority cannot think for themselves) will see this in you regardless, but it is AMPLIFIED when you yourself accept this as your self image. It is a negative self image that seems to be consuming you.
Okay, so you have these qualities, so what's next? You gotta find your grit. What the heck does that mean? Everytime you open your mouth or interact with anyone and they give you some sort of vibe/body language that they don't want to deal with you, too bad; keep saying what you wanna say, because if they can't speak out their issue with you, that's their weakness. If they verbally say they don't want you around or they don't like what you gotta say, don't even waste your time with these people. Hunkerdown in your own skin and stop evaluating what others think as a precious golden truth. Once you've done that, you've found your grit.

Answer 5

From what you've wrote, you don't appear stupid to me =)


One way to have confidence is to be comfortable with yourself. If you know you look great with in what you're wearing, or if that cologne you're wearing is really nicely scented, then your day will by a bit better.

Perhaps you need a great change. Get away from the people and places you know and stay somewhere completely different for a bit. You dont have to watch what you say or do because you know you won't ever see those people again when/if you return.

And you must realize, that people ultimately are friends with people because of their personality. Looks don't have the biggest factor, quite honestly.They hang out with the person because they enjoy their company, not their image.

It seems like you're a great person and you have such great things to offer. Good luck!

Answer 6

All these people you are concerned about will be dead in 60 years. So will you. What will matter is how happy you were. This site is all about you. It will increase your self confidence.

Also it will help you be happier. Can a sad person be self confident? Can a super happy person not have self confidence? Alexander the Great was only 5'4" and he is not known for having a handsome face. What about Donald Trump's hair?

http://phifoundation.org/happiness.html

Answer 7

It takes time to detect a sturdy job. that's largely popular, no longer something to be embarrassed about. Use this time to get some certifications or study a sparkling language. gaining expertise of the language of the recent united states you're in can double or triple your possibilities of having a job. placed an advert contained in the jobs area, ask your associates (or your husband's friends) to allow you to know of any job of their place of work, supply your profile to an HR company - maximum of those may actually help you detect a job faster. Use this time to calm down, study new issues and luxuriate in each second with your husband.

Answer 8

1.Stop caring about other peoples opinion.
2.start doing things that build your confidence that you like and are good at.
3.Change your smile of fear into confidence
4.Love yourself.
If you feel good about yourself,you will be attractive.Its a state of mind,not your face.I struggle with this to.I have good days and bad days.Smile a true smile and someone will smile back. I PROMISE

Answer 9

Listen to this: Has worrying ever made you feel better ?
Has being fearful ever done anything for you ?
Has feeling bad about yourself ever gotten you anywhere ?
Has doubts, negative thinking, etc,. ever helped you

These are stumbling blocks our own minds put up, to defeat ourselves.
Think of it, as a trick of the mind. What you BELIEVE you are~~YOU BECOME.

Answer 10

Some wise man once said: " I was sad I did not have any shoes, until I saw this man who had no legs" Make that your mantra in life.

Regarding building confidence, try this. In your bathroom or bedroom, stand in front of your mirror and talk loudly to yourself. It helps. Trust me.