Is it good that me and my boyfriend don't fight?

Question

Me and my boyfriend don't fight at all. I know that's good in a way but I feel he's not telling me everything that bothers him. Neither do I tell him what bothers me about him. I don't feel like I need to but right now our relationship is a little dull... Is it because we don't fight? I'm serious... I don't understand...

Answer 1

Do you need to fight in order for it not to be dull? If so, then seek help, because it isn't right to require ugly arguments.

Is it that you are kind of walking on eggshells and aren't honest with each other, and this is blocking the relationship?

Too many people now feel that others should be made to order to their specs, and want to re-make everything they dislike. This is NOT a healthy attitude.

So it kind of depends on what kinds of things that are bothering you that you are keeping to yourself (likewise with him).

The things that things that he can change, and that there are good reasons for him to change, you could bring up in a non-confrontational way.

You could also say to him "It seems that [this, or something] about me bothers you; I'd like us to be honest with each other. How about we each tell one thing about the other that we've been holding back on." to start an open conversation.

Or is it simply you've gotten into a rut and you'd like to do more and different things together? That's a much simpler problem. Start suggesting different things to do. If he doesn't want to, suggest this bothers you, and let him make some suggestions.

Answer 2

My husband and I have been together for 12 years and we don't fight. We may disagree on many things but we've never really argued. And there's nothing wrong with that. Of course there are things that when he gets upset at me he doesn't tell me why, and I do the same to him. That's not healthy for our relationship. But of course we are both very patient people and eventually we end up telling each other what bothers us. Your relationship is not dull because you don't fight. Believe me you don't want to be in a relationship where you are fighting all the time. My sis-in-law and her husband fight all the time over little things. That doesn't mean they their relationship is fun. Just enjoy it that you guys don't fight. Maybe you just need new ideas..like find something new to do together.

Answer 3

Fighting isn't good in fact it sucks. I have been on relationships where after a while all it seemed we did is fight I would rather have it be a little dull. You should tell your boyfriend things that bother you but don't purposely start a fight. Just be open with him and I am sure he will open up to you too. Good luck.

Answer 4

Depends. If you're just beginning the relationship give it some time, but if yo've been dating a while and still arent at all, then congratulations, and the best of luck, becaus eyou've found a rare quality indeed. He might not be telling you everything, but he might have a good reason, he's intitled to his secrets, as you are to yours. Something serious happened to me recently, my frioend tried to set me up for a threesomeby leaving me at his house, and after he left his gf came downstairs, fully nude, and asked me. I Walked out, and callled my gf immediately, and she's mad at me for telling her. So he may be trying to protect you, try and have a heart to heart, brcause significant secrets kept from each other will create a rift, and the longer youwait the harder it will be to repair. Maybe you guys should go dancing, or out to a party, see a movie, go out to dinner. I took my gf dirt biking once, she swore she'd hate it. By the end of the day I had to chase her down, lol, she turned it into a bit of a game...but thats another story. The point is, try new things, don't badger him, but try to not look down on something til u've tried it. Get out there and have some fun, lol, you sound like a good couple, just keep it going. Best of luck to you both.

Answer 5

Me and my ex use to be the same way. I told him about it and we would schedule a little date to argue..We didn't do anything that would hurt each other's feelings, just a little planned out play type a thing..it was so cute. We did it like once a month..It was so funny..we would burst into laughter everytime we did it.

I just noticed that I totally didn't answer your question..but yea..try to ask him a really juicy question that will make him think and make you think..like if you wasnt with me who would you be with..if you could be with any celebrity who would it be..ask him to define love!