should I tell a male friend who I've been talking to on line (we seem to hit it off) that I have MS?

Question

for those who don't know ms stands for multiple sclerosis I use a cane off & on, that's all & we've been talking on line for about a week... thanks for the help

Answer 1

Absolutely you should tell him. If he can't deal with it, you'll find out now instead investing more emotion that would make it hurt more later. If it doesn't scare him off, then at least you'll have that much out of the way. You don't want a relationship that's built on hiding things from each other with anyone.

Don't worry. If it's not him, someone will come along sooner or later. Make the most of your life and things will work out.

By the way, I knew a woman who had MS and the only thing that seemed to help her was medical marijuana. She lived in Oregon where that was legal. I don't have an agenda about pot, but I thought it might be a good thing to mention.

Answer 2

If you believe that there is a good or strong possibility that this online friendship cuold turn into a real-life meeting and friendship they you need to tell him. If it will strictly be an online friendship, he does not need to know.

If/when you are ready to tell him about it, try to work it into natural conversation. Don;t just come out with, "Oh, by the say, did I tell you that I have MS and I sometimes walk with a cane?". Instead, gently inform him as you talk about hobbies and activities that you both enjoy doing. If the subject of hiking or rock climbing comes up, that would be an ideal time to say something like, "I would love to be able to do those activities but I am limited in what I can do because I have Multiple Sclerosis.

If he cares, he will ask more details and accept you as you are. If he is not able to deal with it, you will no soon enough and you can focus your energies on somebody who will care. I hope, for your sake, that he still values the friendship even after he learns of your situation.

I wish you both all the best!

Answer 3

A week? A Week? Do you pay no attention to whats going on around you. MS aside, it is the height of foolishness to make any assumptions about someone you've known online for just a week. Caution is the byword when dealing with strangers at anytime but especially those you come into contact through this medium. Right now you can't even be sure he is a he. If after 6 months you are still having an ongoing dialog with this person then you will know better what you can and can't say. And please, when seeking this kind of advice in the future, do so from those you know you can trust, not the world at large. Only those who already love you have your best interest at heart.

Answer 4

A week of chatting on line doesn't make a relationship, that's for sure. I also have MS and i don't see it as a big deal.I don't hide the fact i have it.it just doesn't always come up.If it were someone i thought i might like to have a relationship with , i would mention it, but not in a negative way..I would point out all the things you CAN do and not worry about the things you cant..I guess if this guy is really into extreme sports it might limit your activities together, but if it's somebody that really matters and cares he will find a way to make it work

Answer 5

Of course, you must be honest and upfront about things if you think there is a possibility of releationship, and if he can not deal with the MS then he is a jerk and you need to find one that is willing to stick with you through thick and thin as the disease progesses. My boyfriend knew of mine prior to us dating, and we have been together 6 years and he is very very supportive and understanding when i am having a bad day.

Answer 6

This is where you find who your true friends are. Those who stand with you will always be your friend and possibly more Those who fade away into the night, they will be the ones who were not your friends in the first place. and that is the type of SO called friends you do not need.

Answer 7

I would want to know, before the friendship gets too far along. At your stage it doesn't seem to have too much current effect. But if things continue he may be hurt when he finds out, if he has built undoable expectations. I feel truth and openness pays off.

Answer 8

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Answer 9

Yes, you should tell. It shouldn't be something you're ashamed of. Besides, if you just met this guy it's better to find out if he's narcissistic now rather than later.

Answer 10

Have you met him in person? What is the difference if you tell him? Unless, you are trying to have a relationship with this guy. You need to be honest.