when i was 13 years old,i found out i was adopted.
i didn't relize it before,my real mom was 30 years old when i found it out.she told me in person b/c she was "supossedly" at the time my cousin but really was my mom.i am still related to the people that adopted me only its kinda vise versa. is it crazy at 13 to finally find out?
2006-09-06 13:55:58 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You're so lucky..........I mean it.
2006-09-06 13:58:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, but they should have practiced telling you before really telling you be using a journal or something. What words to use etc.
They should have told you what adoption was at 3 yrs of age then told you around 4 or 5 when you were able to comprehend that sort of information.
They might have not done the right thing but then they may have not been able to tell you because of the lack of know how.
I have a brother that was adopted and he was told at an early age, he also is isolated from the family now out of his choice.
In conclusion I guess there's no right or wrong way to tell a child this sort of information. It will turnout to be a shock no matter.
2006-09-06 14:03:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No dear, not crazy. My best friend was adopted and he didn't know until he was 19 or 20, he was trying to find out who his birth parents were and his adoptive parents wouldn't tell them. He went to the court and they wouldn't disclose the info until he was 21 (isn't that retarded?) but he finally found out anyway. He KNEW his birth mother, she waitressed at a restaurant that he went to a lot. He has a relationship with her and his biological dad and his family, and still loves his adoptive parents, calls them Mom and Dad and all are happy now that the big secret is out. It was traumatic for my friend how he found out, he went to a file cabinet to get something else and the folder just jumped out at him.... I hope it wasn't so bad for you finding out! I've often wondered how kids felt when another family member adopts, but I'm sure they thought it was best for you and that is a big and very loving decision. Try to understand and not be hard on them. Sounds like you a have a lot of family members who love you! How fortunate you are. Hang in there, sweetie!
2006-09-06 14:01:14 · answer #3 · answered by Giovanni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's just me, but a "real" mom is the one who raised you. The one who gave birth to you is a "biological (or bio)" mom. I'm glad that you know and are friendly with your bio-mom. She probably had someone else in the family adopt you because she was a young teen and couldn't handle it. It's nice that you are related to your adoptive parents. Don't worry about it. Just enjoy your life and be happy you are so loved.
2006-09-06 14:15:21 · answer #4 · answered by Ms. G. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hello,
You are lucky to know who your mom is and that you have contact. My husband doesn't know either paren and he's lnown since he was 8 yrs old. His adopted father knows who they are but won't tell. He stresses that he is my husband's father and no one else. His mom doesn't remember since she is an acoholic. For me, it's hard to understand why his dad is like this. We have two kids and don't know what kind of medical conditions his parents may be carring or inherited to pass on. I envy you. Make the most of it. I am sure she loves you as much as your adoptive parents. Hey, you just have more parents then some of us that's all so you can get more love all around.
Best of luck
God bless
2006-09-06 14:03:54 · answer #5 · answered by aggedflame 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, they should have told you sooner. I was adopted and have known ever since I was old enough to understand.
I have never had any issues and you should not either as long as you feel like you have a good loving life. At least you know your birth mother. Now it is like you have 2 moms.
2006-09-07 09:18:20 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be thankful that you have a loving family. It sounds weird that your cousin is really your mom but at least she kept you close in the family, that show's she really cares about you. Obviously she had some problems at the time but thankfully, you know who your biological mother is......... some kids never know.
Smile and be happy!
2006-09-06 14:00:08 · answer #7 · answered by my2cents 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is difficult. but be happy that you didn't find out at age 50 or later.when you have lived your entire life almost.now you can establish a relationship with your birth parents if YOU want to. You are here because GOD,your birth mother, and adopted parents wanted you to be here.enjoy life ok.youre 13 it will be ok
2006-09-06 14:06:42 · answer #8 · answered by cuteGIRL01 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you have to understand that they do love you because you were adopted and the cousin thing, well it's hard to get a young child to understand that sometimes to show our love we have to let go and hope that they ( the children) will have a better life that what the person or persons that adopted you out could pervide at the time.
2006-09-06 14:07:55 · answer #9 · answered by mia t 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey be glad now that you got two moms instead of one, think about the children who have none, look at the positive side of things than bragging on something that is not worth while, grow up !
2006-09-06 14:01:37 · answer #10 · answered by Adrian S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your "mothers and dads" rather are your mothers and dads. merely because of the fact they are no longer biologically related to you does no longer mean that they do no longer love you, and that they lovetheir organic and organic toddlers greater desirable than you. They wanted yet another new child sufficient to go out and supply one that wasn't going to have a guess otherwise a house. you're able to experience cherish that your mothers and dads accompanied you. It ability which you're much greater particular to them. Your youthful sibling could have been conceived as an twist of fate, and perchance your mothers and dads have been bowled over to ascertain that they could have greater toddlers. merely considering that they had a new child when you does no longer mean they do no longer love you. As on your delivery mom, who in definitely actuality isn't your determine, because of the fact she did no longer develop you, love you sufficient to grant you a greater appropriate existence. i comprehend you are able to desire to be feeling adverse, and such as you're no longer good sufficient for her, and that she could desire to hate you, yet you're able to comprehend that that merely isn't real. She enjoyed you sufficient to grant you to 2 loving people who might cherish your existence and that i've got you ever one which you deserved. Your existence hasn't been a lie, because of the fact your mothers and dads are your mothers and dads. The dictionary definition of determine is a father or a mom. you're able to no longer experience that your existence is a lie, you're able to experience enjoyed because of the fact your mothers and dads care sufficient approximately you to tell you the actuality approximately your previous.
2016-09-30 10:12:34 · answer #11 · answered by sashi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋