Why didn't Noah just swat those two mosquitoes?

Answer 1

LOL
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Answer 2

He knew that the sound of somebody fighting a mosquito and slapping themselves repeatedly at 3am in some grotty travellers "hotel" in Thailand or India would be incredibly funny to anybody in the next room who had brought a mosquito net with them. There's always somebody that wants to impress people and say they don't need mosquito nets or malaria tablets because there are more natural ways of dealing with such problems.

My favourites of these have been the French spoken ones. Not because I like to hear the French getting bitten but because there are some French spoken men who really can't chill out and have to try to impress everybody by saying how immune to mosquito bites they are because they have blood that is much richer than the average person. This isn't a trait of the French, just the trait of a real pain in the butt. There are other bonuses with the French speakers though........

What's funny is when the mosquito starts on him and you hear him slap his own shoulder hard enough to sound like a whip and whisper a sweet curse to the mosquito.

The mosqito flies away.

Two minutes later, the same thing happens again.

Over a two hour period, our good friend and neighbour gets bitten with increasing frequency and eventually becomes psychotic with rage screaming at the top of his voice in French that he will hunt down every last mosquito in Asia until they are all dead and then go after any other flying insect and make a giant fly kebab out of them.

When this happens, i stay up all night and wait for our hero to get up in the morning to go to the bathroom or to sneak out of the hostel/ hotel, unusually early to avoid the attention of those he tried to impress the day before. As soon he's in no mans land between his door and the bathroom or just having locked his own door, I ambush him. I casually but speedily exit my room and ask if he's OK and look intently at the huge red bites he's been scratching all night. With great concern I ask if he thinks maybe the mosquitos here like rich blood and maybe he's not immune to the mosquitos here.

Sometimes they just sprint as soon as they hear me starting to unlock my door (even though i've mastered the art of unlocking hotel doors at high speed for just such occaisions) like they know what's coming.

Like I said, it's not because I dislike the French. It's because they just swear and curse so well even when slapping themselves all over to try to catch that damned mosquito.

Noah was obviously a visionary. He may have thought that gnats and mosquitos would prevent people from pissing in the river that everybody else drinks from.

Answer 3

Booooooo Noah

Answer 4

Never mind that. Where in the middle east did he find 2 polar bears? Or Aardvarks for that matter. and that doesn't even start to consider the animals that he didn't (couldn't) know about like bacteria and viruses.

Answer 5

Yeah and why didn't he dump the elephants overboard. I've got one trampling around in my front garden right now. A big pink thing weighing I guess 2 tons.

Answer 6

The mosquitoes made a first-mover advantage - they passed on malaria to Noah so he didn't have any energy to attack.

Answer 7

Have you seen those mosquitoes in bay of Bengal after the big flood.

Answer 8

If Noah had been truly wise, he would have swatted those two flies.

Answer 9

It would have disrupted the delicate biological balance in the world.


I'm right with you though, I hate mosquitoes.

Answer 10

They'd of had to fly unfed for 40 days, and the male would've died on the ark, 'cause they suck plant juices! Hmm, there's something fishy about this ark thing.

Answer 11

Noah had bigger things to think of, such as DINOSAURS. Of course you all know how useful they were to Noah, right? See below.