How do you make a toddler leave?

Question

I try everything to get my 2.5 yr old ot leave the playground and in the end here I am 9 months pregnant literally dragging him to the car. I try telling him Daddy's home now let's go see him. I try telling him your milk is in the car let's go get it. Itry if you don't listen I am giving you time out when we get home. I try speaking to him in a stern voice. I try picking him up but he just dives down. I just don't know what to do. I have to drag him by the wrist and wiggles around so much I feel like I'll brake his wrist.

I know people are going to tell me to take away a toy or put in time out but what do I do at that moment when I need to get him in the car?

No bribing with candy people, normally I am leaving for dinner and don't want him to have junk. Also I rarely take him to the park in my condition so if I didn't take him he actually would never ever go.

Answer 1

you wont break his wrists. Sorry to say it but drag him and tell him you are disappointed in him as well. It is just a phase, a sucky, sucky phase. Good luck!

Answer 2

My daughter does not like leaving the park either. Its normal for him to want to stay at the park or outside and play. Its also healthy for him too. I would not offer punishment for him not comming. I would suggest saying next time we will not be able to stay as long.
I would suggest bringing him once or twice a week. As a mother of 3 I know this can be a challenge. But you can do anything you really want to do.
Give him a fair amount of time at the park/outside time. I ushually give min. 30 minutes on really cold days, and anywheres from 1-2 hours on a nicer day.
When its almost time to leave let him know "in 10 minutes we are going to leave", then "5 more minutes" , " I am going to set the timer" then we need to leave. Doing this lets him know its almost time and he will less likely fight it.
Ask your husband (if hes home) to take a turn taking him to the park or outside to play. More often then not daddys are great for play! Maybe he could take on the once a week turn, and your son would love it.
Also just to be on the safe side, always bring a strollar with you into the park. This will allow you to keep hold of him between the park and the car. Umbrella strollars work wonders.

Answer 3

Do you let him know you'll be leaving soon? Transitions are very hard. I wouldn't bribe him without milk or daddy or threaten time outs because those are all in the future an dhe lives in the present.

Every mom has finally turned around and walked away, (while using those eyes in the back of her head), and usually the child runs after her when he sees she's serious.. Sometimes it comes to that, even with this method that we always used and was highly effective:

15 mintues before we need to leave, I say - we're leaving in 15 minutes. (I used to say, "That's 1/2 of a Barney [episode.]" Then, I would say, "Ten minutes until we leave." Then, "Five minutes until we leave." Then, "It's time to go, say goodbye to the playground." "Good bye swing, goodbye slide."

This is usually 100% effective. Sometimes you also have to grant his wish in fantasy, as they say in "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk."

Example- he says, "I want to stay, I want to stay, I want to stay." "Ohmigosh,you say,"I wish you could stay. I could build you a house right under the slide and...." This helps a lot, too. He then knows you are on his side. You care that it's hard to transition. There is absolutely no reason to punish, threaten, or bribe. no reason to make outings a drag because of the ending, no pun intended!

Answer 4

Why dont you try giving him a 10, 5 and 2 min. warning. Tell him before you get out of the car that when you say it is time to go home he needs to listen and get up and leave with you or you will not bring him back to the playground again. Be serious with him and make sure he understands BEFORE you get out of the car.
If he starts to throw a fit when you say its time to go, squat down to his level and look him in the eye and ask him if he remembers what you told him in the car. Tell him if he doesnt quietly walk with you back to the car then this will be the last time he comes back to the playground. Ask him if that is what he wants. He will say "no", then you can say, "ok, then lets walk back to the car, Daddy is waiting for us at home, since you are choosing to be a good boy we will come back on _____."
At this age he wants to know why have to be the way they are. Sometimes you have to spend a little longer explaining things to them, saying them over and over again so they can fully understand.

Answer 5

I have this same problem with my 2.5 year old. I started looking at what time of day I was bringing him to the park. Later on in the day was becoming problematic, so we just started going earlier in the day. I think he's probably tired and hungry and over-stimulated at that time of day, and also there seems to be a lot more kids around at that time.

Being 9 months preggers doesn't help, but you just gotta pick him up and bring him to the car. Good luck!

Answer 6

Set the ground rules before you go.

"When it's getting close to time to come home, Mommy will give you a warning that it's almost time to leave. When I say it's time to go, you need to come with me right away."

Make it clear when you are leaving and give him warning. This will help him with the transition.

Give a 5 mins warning, a 3 mins warning and a "last thing" warning where he gets one last trip down the slide or one last push on the swing, etc. You can do a "5-4-3-2-1-BLAST OFF!" on the swing, something like that.

Encourage him to say "Bye bye" to the slide, the swing, the park itself, whatever he likes most.

Answer 7

How about taking him to the park a little earlier n the day? That way a small bribe ( I use a Popsicle ) won't ruin his appetite. And eventually, you can stop bribing. I could anyway. I just say, "next time" and it works. Maybe I just have a great girl. (I KNOW I DO!!)

Oh! And warnings work wonders. "15 minutes and we have to leave okay?" Then 10, 5, 2 more slides and it's time to go. That works too.

Answer 8

My middle girl would give me fits and starts about leaving places. I could not get her to get into the car when it was time to go. I was somewhere safe and a friend was nearby (I was also pregnant) and I said goodbye. Got my oldest into the car and buckled in. Closed the car up and started the car - she screamed wait and came running. Now when she starts to dawdle I can just say good bye and walk away I know that she is not far behind because she knows that I have in the past left her.

Answer 9

explain to the child why he needs to leave the playground it is time to go home. I know you enjoy the playground but we can come back tomorrow. children at this age are trying to get independence by telling him that he needs to help you he might be more into leaving. don;t punish it wont work in the long run. I am a daycare worker and this is what i do with the kids when they dont want to come in for snack or nap time. they are smart and realy eager to please you.

Answer 10

I would suggest bringing one of those egg timers. Set it for how long you like, When the time is almost up stand next to him so he can hear the ding. Then tell him its time to go. If he kicks or screams take away 1 park day for that wk.
PS: explain to him that today we are going to play at the park for X amounts Mins. when you hear the ding its time to go (give him like 5 or 10 min warning) Bring stickers or a stamp every time he leaves without a fuss give him a sticker or stamp his hand.

Answer 11

Maybe you need to look at why he doesn't want to leave. Are his friends still playing? Maybe you could talk to him about it. I know he is young, but I used to talk to mine and he understood a lot more than people would have thought.

Some kids are just difficult. Maybe you will have to keep dragging him until he gets the idea. Or maybe your husband could talk to him - or even go get him for you until you have the next child.

Whatever you do, always keep letting your child know you love him.