my uncle just died of cancer?

Question

im realy sad about it and i dont want to go to the fuineral cause i dont want to cry infront of my whole family he ment alot to me.im only in 7th grade

he died of lukiemia and he became anorexic because he couldnt feed himself or swallow the last time i saw him was a mounth before he died when he told me he had cancer i thought he would be fine but the last word i said to him is stop being annoying and i feel so bad now. If you have any information about cancer can u tell me please.

Answer 1

There's nothing to be ashamed about crying at a funeral for someone you loved.

Answer 2

I never go to funerals. Just a policy I have.
I like to remember people the way they were alive, not with everyone grieving. Sure I have gotten a lot of complaints about it, I always come up with a pretty good excuse.
When my cousin died from cancer I didn't have an excuse, so I just was honest and told every one I wanted to remember her the last time I saw her, not with a bunch of people all sad.
Later I have though, on my own gone and had my own personal grieving moments, a memorial of sorts, when I put flowers in the ocean and say goodbye.
Don't worry you wont be a nut when you get older if you don't go everyone has their own way of dealing with death.

Answer 3

I am so sorry to hear about your loss honey. Dont fret though- while the pain may be intense right now, and you may not want to go to the funeral, your uncle would have wanted you to go.

My mom passed away 4 years ago on New Years from cancer. It was hard going to her funeral and i cried for a very long time. Crying did me no good however and I had to stand up and face my family.

Your family cares about you and you are all there to support each other in your time of loss... depend on them- let them be strong where you cant!

Answer 4

Tuesdays with Morrie - good book.

Never be ashamed to cry, you shouldn't feel strange crying at a funeral or anything else. In fact I spent the last 3 days crying in front of different people because Steve Irwin died.

Really sorry to hear about your uncle too, by the way. My Uncle died close to my birthday because of Alcohol Poisoning.

Answer 5

*hug* go to the funeral, it'll help you along coming to terms with it. you won't be the only one there crying either, and even if you were it is nothing to be ashamed off, but healthy and good - when we lose someone who meant a lot to us, we get sad and we cry, that's all there is to it. i know at the moment you probably feel like you'll never be happy again, especially as you probably saw your uncle die over a long period of time and felt sorry for him, cancer is cruel like that. over time, however, the sadness will go and you'll remember more and more fun things you and your uncle did together. first these memories will probably make you sad again, but you'll find that eventually they'll make you smile because that's what your uncle did. you'll learn to celebrate his life instead of lamenting his death, and that's the way it should be. this process will start with the funeral because that is the one chance we living have to give the dead our respects. take it as the one chance you still have to tell your uncle how much he meant to you, and afterwards you'll be proud of yourself because you didn't chicken out of it and you did all you can to show your uncle your love right till the very end and beyond it. if you don't go some part of you will always feel guilty, and some part of you will always wonder what it would have been like to go. so, go, cry, talk, laugh when you feel like it - and you can laugh at funerals, they tend to be the best ones. your uncle wouldn't want you to be sad and alone, he'd want you to be proud of yourself and he'd be happy to see you there. good luck! :-)

edit - i just read your detail there. of course you feel bad now for having told your uncle not to be annoying, but, believe me, he knew you didn't want to hurt him. you are how old? twelve? 13? he wouldn't have been a good uncle (and he obviously was or you wouldn't be so sad) if he had felt hurt by that and taken it seriously, you were still too young to know or say anything better. my grandmother died of senile dementia when i was 17 and if i had another hour with her i'd do a whole lot of apologising for all the things i told her as a child and teenager. only, now there is no point in feeling bad about it, we can't change what we said to them and if they were any wise they knew we were too young to know better - believe me, most grown ups do because they were once children and teenagers too. so, don't feel bad. use the funeral as an opportunity to apologise and you'll feel a whole lot better already. about cancer - even though a lot of people who get it now can be cured and turn out fine in the end, a whole lot of people still don't. some forms are almost always curable now, if detected early enough, and some almost never are and will kill the sufferer. a positive thing you could do once you feel a bit better than now - with your wounds so raw still it would probably make you feel worse - is to find out about different kinds of cancer and the warning signs for them, so that if you or any of your family and friends show any of these symptoms you can tell them to go to the doctor and maybe save their lives that way, wouldn't that be great? another great thing you could do in your uncle's memory is to become involved in a cancer charity, you could maybe stage a fundraiser at your school for cancer research, cancer care etc. or ask your local cancer charities if you can help. all these things will help you with your grief and, most importantly, will mean your uncle hasn't died in vain.

Answer 6

I am really sorry for the loss... Deepest sympathy for you and your family...
I think you should definately go to the funeral because you should let out your feelings.
Everyone else there will also be crying.
I also think that your Uncle would be happy if you went.
No one will judge you if you are crying at a funeral...
Funerals are sad and everyone will be crying.

Answer 7

I am so sorry for your loss. Unfortunately, death of loved ones is a part of life and we are never prepared for it. Talk with your mother or father about your feelings, cry when you need to, and decide with your parents whether or not to attend the funeral. The funeral is really for the living to help them grieve. My heart goes out to you and your family.

Answer 8

Sorry for your loss. My sympathy goes to you and your family.
There is nothing wrong with crying over the loss of a loved one. Going to the funeral and crying is part of the grieving process.

Answer 9

attempt to place aside the timing of your loss, for which i'm so sorry for you. this is larger that which you bear in techniques the happiness he gave at the same time as he became into alive. maximum grandfathers, have an exceedingly specific relationship with their grandchildren, because of the fact they relive their life by them. focus on your training, and enable your instructor be attentive to of your loss. it is amazingly significant on your instructor because of the fact it is going to tell in develop that there'll be a loss of concentration, on your section. Time will heal the harm which you're feeling now after which you will savour the cases which you spent jointly.

Answer 10

I know it hard my dad died of cancer when I was a kid but don't worry about your family they will love and support. If you don't go to the funeral thats your own decision but you need closure and his memory will always be with you.

Answer 11

I'm sorry to hear about your uncle.
He's in a better place now & he's no longer suffering. Believe me he already knows you didn't mean anything by that comment. When you pass over you automatically understand things.
Everything that confuses you here all makes sense there.
Just talk to him as you would have done when he was here. He can hear you.