If you have a whiny baby...?

Question

What are you supposed to do? I read an answer here that said you "need to just hold them all the time". LOL!! So, I guess adults don't need to poop, piss, eat, and TCB? WTF??? I agree that babies need TONS of love, but goodness, is 15 minutes of crying so mom or dad can go to the potty or eat something child abuse? Maybe they need a break, simple as that. Or, should they just run to the kid anyways despite that fact that they need to cool down?

Where is this manual of perfect parenting? Is it an E-zine? Can someone send it to my e-mail? Thanks in advnace. I have yet to find a way to eat hot chow and safely hold a baby. Please foward this secret. It could quite possibly be the biggest find since the Dead Sea Scrolls.

Answer 1

i'm gonna to share something with you my ex-mother in law shared with me when i tried the whole never eat, never sleep, never take bath, never clean method. and to whoever else is reading this.

THE BABY WILL NOT DIE FROM CRYING!!! yes babies need to be held and comforted. but if they continue to cry despite the , something else is wrong!! plain and simple.

DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP

DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK ANY QUESTION NO MATTER HOW STUPID.

NEVER TURN DOWN ANY HELP OFFERED

ALWAYS TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS

Answer 2

Well I have to say I am right there with you on this. My daughter is so demanding of my attention and she is 21 months old. She has always been like that. Whiny as you say is what she is. I love her to pieces, but would like to have a few minutes a day to eat and go to the bathroom without her crying while i am sitting on the toilet. Eating is not even enjoyable. It is a wonder why some of us mothers lose so much weight after having children. I know that some days I barely eat. Simply because when I finally get that quiet moment to sit and eat I am so exhausted and want to lay down and close my eyes. Right now she is what seems to be the terrible 2's. She is thinking she is the boss of the house. Some days I don't even want to go anywhere with her because I know it will not be enjoyable. Lately it seems like everything is a battle with her. Sometimes I do feel like I must be doing something wrong as a parent when she acts like that. We have to realize that not every child acts the same. They all have their own personalities. There is nothing wrong with putting your child down and letting her cry for a few minutes while you eat, go to the bathroom, or just need a break. In fact it is better to do that then to let yourself get so frustrated that you lose it. Being a parent is the hardest job their is. Their is no perfect parenting. Love them is the most important thing.

Answer 3

Maybe I don't get the question.

Some babies just need to cry. It can sometimes be a way of expressing frustation. If you need to go to the bathroom, then go to the bathroom. If you need a shower, then go take a shower. If your baby cries, take him with you. There's no shame in bringing a baby with you in the shower or putting him in a swing by the shower.

If you need a break, then get someone to help you take a break. If this is you, then it sounds like you're to the brink of exhaustion. Check with the doctor to see if it's not reflux or something more serious. If something doesn't seem right, then go see the doctor.

We had colic for 3 months. I know what crying non-stop does to you. However, we changed formulas and everything has been great ever since.

Answer 4

Depends on the age. If a tiny infant, it does need a whole lot of soothing and holding and making sure it's full and dry. But certainly feel free to put the babe down for 15 or 20 min. behind a closed door so you can have a meal in relative peace. If it's colic, it may go away by age 3 or 4 months. If it really screams a lot, consider food allergy. Could be allergic to formula, milk, or mom's milk. Docs can assist with that assessment. Try to get some relief from a friend, relative, or neighbor or you'll go crazy. Also the bouncy carriers and rides in a car can calm them down when they have colic-it was the only relief we got when our oldest was tiny. We'd take her out on rough ranch roads and she would settle down, often for the night. Good luck.

Answer 5

There are a couple of fgood books out there, but none of them will answer all your questions. I'll list the ones that I have liked. There are no such things as perfect parents, and it's okay to try different things. Your baby crying is NOT an indication of bad parenting. (Except in extreme circumstances of neglect, which this obviously isn't.)

If your baby is young, you might have a collicky baby. Two types of colic- gastrointestinal and neurological. Basically, doctors don't really know WHY collicky babies cry all the time, but they think it's part of how they respond to their development. If your baby is collicky, there are some "tricks" to helping her, but really only time heals it. Babies stop the collicky symptoms sometime between 3 and 6 months. (I know, pray for the 3...)

My doctor told me that babies cry when they experience anything new. It's the only response they know. She told me to start letting my son CIO at 5 weeks. I felt this was way too young, and did hold him to let him sleep for a long time. It was the only way he would fall asleep the first 6 weeks- in my arms. But when he was awake, not trying to fall asleep, I would use the swing to help him. By 11 weeks, he was falling asleep by himself in the crib, and sleeping through the night. So, although it seems of little encouragement now, it WILL get better.

You are on a hormonal roller coaster right now, on top of being tired and healing. You should only hold your baby as long as you can emotionally handle it. If your baby cries, in your arms or out, it is A-OK for you to take 5-15 minutes to yourself. If you find yourself getting angry, or thinking of hurting your baby, walk away. Nothing can happen in 15 minutes that will permanently harm your baby, if she's just crying. But a hormonal woman CAN do things that she normailly wouldn't when she hears a constantly crying baby.

Hang in there, and know that you are not alone. And it will get better. And it IS worth it. You might actually consider doing it again. =)

Answer 6

Depends on how old your baby is. Remember - before a baby learns to say anything (usually starting with NO!!!...lol) the only way they have to communicate is through different general sounds. So, your baby might be whiny simply because she's not particularly happy at the moment -- doesn't mean you have to hold her all the time. Now, if this is non-stop, it could be colic... they grow out of that. Still doesn't mean you have to hold her all the time. Find things she likes that distract her. My son loved the baby swing and the play pen. And sometimes, it IS time for a nap even if they don't want to.

Answer 7

How old is your baby? Newborns sometimes don't want to be hold. (my neice) Anyway, when it's time to eat, place them ina car seat or carrier and put them close to you. The sound of your voice should be enough to keep a wail-fest from erupting. Make sure there is nothing around the little toes or fingers, burps are done, diapers fresh, not too hot or cold. It sounds like common sense, but when you have a screaming baby, sometimes it's easy to forget to check that stuff. Also, if you are formula feeding, DON'T SWITCH BRANDS OFTEN. Their tummies are a lot more sensitive and can get gas and bloating and pain more than ours.

Hang in there!!

Answer 8

I had a whiny baby the doc said if they are changed fed and you know your have done everything you can to comfort them then put them down let them cry and then go back about 15 to 20 minutes later check them reassure them and let them cry again Repeat the cycle as often as needed or as long as you can stand it. It is nerve racking at first but breaks the pick me up pains and eventually they know they are not getting held every second of the day. just make sure you go check them rub their back a little comfort them then walk away again. It worked for mine. good luck

Answer 9

it's not going to hurt your baby to cry in fact my dr said it was good for them because it builds up there lungs...haha as if you really need them to inhale anymore air to let out a louder scream...but its good for them it teaches them hey mom needs time from me too and gives them a reason to sit in there crib and look at all the cool stuff you bought for them while they were in your belly...you cant comfort them for the4 rest of there lives eventually they got to learn to do things on there own.......lay the kid down and eat a hot meal!!! take a piss and maybe even a crap all at the same time lol they arent getting out of that crib trust me!! lol

Answer 10

I agree with flamigo, the baby swing is definitely the way to go.. if my baby gets fussy and we've fed, changed, burped and rocked him and he's still crying, there's nothing else for us to do.. if the crying gets too bad we put him up in his room.. he quiets down eventually, but lucky for us it doesn't happen too often...