I have this Best friend who signed up for the Navy, but before he left he asked me to marry him. But I have to wait 5 YEARS! Until we both get our carreers. We have been talking for at least 5 months (everyday). He barely left 2 weeks ago and I feel so empty inside. We kissed that day he left and I have never felt the way I did for him about anyone. He is such a great person with beautiful dreams and he's so honest. I am sure he would be great at being my life partner. But Im also only 18 yrs old and he is also 18. And i definetly don't want to make a mistake with the whole marrying him. To wait or not to wait... that is the question. HELP!
2006-09-06 11:09:53 · 15 answers · asked by Khat 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
It IS possible to make a long-distance relationship work. Don't leave him just because of the looming time period ahead of you. If you love each other, give it a try. But it will probably be very difficult. If, after a while, you don't think you can be faithful to him (or vice versa,) then be fair and break it off. If you're both still available when he gets back, then who knows what could happen?
I waited for my boyfriend for almost 2 years while he was on the other side of the country (Army.) It did work. We talked every day, emailed, etc. and we were able to see each other for the occasional 3-day weekend. He always showed his appreciation for me, and we were both faithful the whole time. He got back 4 years ago and we're still together.
To make it work, you have to be faithful, loyal, show your appreciation, and don't guilt trip him all the time about being gone.
2006-09-06 13:27:51 · answer #1 · answered by Heidi 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your feelings are normal considering the situation! This of course is a question that only you can answer! Both of you are pretty young!
People do marry while in the service! Give it time, you'll come up with the answer!
5 years is a long time to wait. People do change from 18 to 23,
both of you could have a completely different outlook on things by then!
By then you could love one another more or maybe not be able to stand one another! Life has a way of changing things!
Life is always changing, Wishing you guys the best! God Bless
2006-09-06 18:54:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it a try. You're both young enough if you spend 2-3 years together, and it doesn't work out, it wont be the end of the world. He'll be home on leave and you can probably go see him.
Now, on the down side, having dated a Navy guy, don't be too trusting. He may say all the right things on the phone, but while he's thousands of miles away, you won't know what he's doing. And the same goes for you. That's just what happened to me, he may not be a jerk like the guy I dated - at least I hope not for your sake!
Good luck!!
2006-09-06 20:27:29 · answer #3 · answered by Kelly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you guys should have an "open" relationship until he's out of the Navy, and see if in 5 years you guys are even feeling eachother THEN you can be committed, you may even call it quits before then. You are both young, and many a military man have fathered children abroad during their stint surving our country. This is when you should be discovering who you are as a young woman and what you want for yourself in life. It's to soon to start thinking about forever with someone and putting your experiences with love on hold for 5 years for something that may not even work out in the long run or perhaps the short run. Think about it, even he should be doing the same, especially if he's going to be in the Navy. He's only been gone for 2 weeks, yet already you are doubting your decision. That means that you should listen to your instinct. It may be hard to admit you've reconsidered but you won't regret it!
2006-09-06 18:17:33 · answer #4 · answered by GirlUdontKnow 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Give it a bit of time and see how much love develops between you. 5yrs is not that long if it means you'll be happy the rest of your life. !8 is a bit young to get married so waiting would be good idea even if he wasn't in the Navy. And he will be able to get leave and come home so just give it some time and see how things work out. Best of Luck to you both.
2006-09-06 18:14:21 · answer #5 · answered by shelshe 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nooo, I would not wait for ANYONE for 5 years. Are you kidding? Don't get shackled into a make-believe relationship; go to school, develop friendships, date - experience everything this world has to offer - before you're ready to make a mature full-hearted committment. Relationships are about being close, dealing with the person face-to-face, discovering each other - not about painting a wishful picture of a person who only exists in your imagination. There's nothing wrong with falling in love, but it certainly would be foolish to commit to someone who's not even going to be around.
2006-09-06 18:17:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you have to wait for 5 years? Marry him now, if that is what you both want.
2006-09-06 18:24:41 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you can wait without getting into another man then yes. i have been in the situation and we did get married so................. it's on you. those guys tend to want to come home to how they left things so if you ask me, give it a try. you can always break up. just wait on the whole marriage thing. until he has a ring and some plans to move you to the same state.
2006-09-06 18:30:17 · answer #8 · answered by denavirgo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO I would not. 5 years is a long time and a lot could happen in between. besides, i've known a lot of guys in the armed forces who cheated on their girlfriends.
2006-09-06 19:42:55 · answer #9 · answered by chapped lips 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you both have careers to start, now it will take time and no he will not be gone for 5 yrs straight he will have leaves here and there, he will also dock at different ports through your country, and you probably could travel and meet there when he is on shore leave
but thats upto you and its your choice
2006-09-06 18:26:25 · answer #10 · answered by free2chat_tou 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋