Do you think that physical discipline is necessary when raising a child?

Question

I do not mean child abuse, but physical contact, such as a light smack or hit to a child that would not cause bruising, but only minor and temporary pain. I do not believe in child abuse, i am simply curious to find out the beliefs of the public on physical discipline when raising a child. Please don't take this question as something else.

Answer 1

This is a very polarizing question. People in both camps feel very strongly. I happen to be in the no physical punishment under any circumstances camp. I could make my case to you and you could read the opinions of others, but why not look at what the experts say? If you've read any childcare articles or books, you've probably discovered that opinions vary widely on topics like sleep, feeding, scheduling, etc. But childcare experts and pediatricians pretty much universally agree that physical punishment is wrong.

Okay, I will elaborate on my opinion. I think physical punishment is short-sighted, lazy parenting. Disciplining a child is not something done reactively, when the child has done something wrong. Disciplining a child involves teaching, over time and repeatedly (and repeatedly, and repeatedly) what is acceptable and what is not. Then, following that up with age-appropriate consequences for unacceptable behavior. If you wait until the child has done something wrong to step in and discipline, then you've not done your job as a parent. A child needs to know what the boundaries are, and to achieve that, you need to be an active, present parent. I think people who use physical punishment are too lazy to invest the time it takes to really nurture and teach their child right from wrong.

I have a two-year old who is a high-energy, curious, willful little girl, but she is wonderful, well behaved and a joy to be around and I have never, ever, EVER hit her, nor could I ever imagine doing so. And no, I didn't "luck out" with an "easy" child. She can be very challenging at times, but parenting is an ongoing process and you have to work very hard to instill lessons, but in the long run, active parenting, in my opinion, will result in a better parent-child relationship, will not damage the child's emotional core and will better equip the child to make informed decisions about their actions - they should act out of what they think is right or wrong rather than out of fear of retribution.

Answer 2

HAHAHA yea everyone that just said how spanking is pretty much bad, Are full of it. They are the ones who raise there kids to be disrespectful, they are the ones that have the kids spoiled to no hill top, make sure you buy your child everything so they dont throw that fit in the store type of people, Well id like to know what you would have thought 50 years ago, when spanking was a part of 99% of households. Goes to show where the world went wrong. Oh yea dont forget the kids that kill, steal, lie and cause damage to others, they are usually the ones that have parents believe everything coming from their mouths. You are the parent NOT the friend....people seem to forget that. You need to put some fear into your kids, They will respect you alot more when they are older. Pay attention to the "elders" ask them what they think. They would have never raised kids to be as disrespectful as todays society. Kids need spankings period.

Answer 3

I am a parent and I do not discipline my child physically. However, I am not against it. Look at the children/young adults in the world today. Compared to decades previous, they are bratty, disrespectful and rude. This is generally speaking. I realize that all of you other parents reading this have "perfect" children. I feel that society takes the matter of spanking and such much too seriously. Yeah, yeah. Psychological damage, yatta yatta. My dad spanked me when I was bad. I never bleed. I never bruised. But I do respect my father. Period. You need to do what feel right for you and your relationship with you children. Personally, I find yelling to be far more fearful for children than a pat on the butt. Good luck!

Answer 4

Physical contact is child abuse in my opinion.

No one has a right to place physical body parts on another to inflict pain.

If you don't want your mother/father/sibling or even friend to smack/hit you, I suggest you don't do it to your own child.

If you hit your child and your child starts to hit back, don't complain.

You will only be teaching the child as the child is responding back with the same teaching.

Monkey see. Monkey do.

I was a very young child when I understood this. My mother didn't lay a hand on me until one day and she never laid a hand on me since when I discussed how I felt about it.

If a child is out of hand, maybe instead of blaming the child. Maybe should start to blame the parenting skills. Have to change it and alter it. Not think spannking will do it for you........

Answer 5

I try to use things like time outs, being grounded, apology letters, being excluded from certain activities (not school/or sport activities where these are a responsibility). As a last resort, if nothing works, then a good spanking is given. I would never smack my childs mouth they make hot sauce and soap for the mouth when its bad.

Answer 6

I think it depend on the child and the situation.
Ex. Child keeps running towards street no matter what would you spank them or one day they get out away from you and they end up getting hit by a vehicle. or If they keep trying to touch a fireplace would you spank them and tell them hot it will burn or let them get burned.
Some children are stubborn and hardheaded.
Sometimes talking to them doesnot register.

Answer 7

Of course. I use anything that works. I have 3 children and they each respond differently to discipline. I swat butts, I sent them to sit on beds, I take favorite toys away, I take dessert or weekend trips away, I fuss. I'd never stick to any 1 method because a mixture seems to work best for me. As long as my kids know they cannot whine me into giving in, and they respect me as a parent, then I've done my job. I'm raising my children to become adults. A swat on the butt to correct them now is alot better than what can happen to a wild, self-absorbed adult. Train up a child and all that....

Answer 8

ABSOLUTELY! My parents spanked me and I turned out to be a respectful adult. I swat my son on the bottom when he is out of line. He is generally the MOST well-behaved 3 year old I have ever seen. He only gets in trouble when he is really tired and is throwing a temper tantrum. Kids today walk all over their parents. It's sickening. I refuse to raise a spoiled brat. If he misbehaves, he gets punished (nose in the corner). If he does it again, after standing in the corner, he gets a swat. He doesn't misbehave again. A lot more parents need to spank their kids. There would be less problems in the schools if parents would spank.

One of my professors did a study about children who were spanked. In my class of 200, over half that were spanked also played musical instruments. Out of everyone in the class (upperlevel very hard class) only 15 had not been spanked. She found that the kids that are spanked usually are more successful than those who are not. It was very interesting. She said that's how most of her upper level classes are...mostly filled with people that were spanked when they were kids.

Answer 9

I spank my kids when they need it which is not very often. I found that putting them in the corner works fine with them. I don't see that a spanking ever ruined any child. Seems to me that a few more parents should take that route with discipline. There is definately a difference between abuse and discipline.

Answer 10

A child needs "barriers". Discipline is important. If there is none, if he does as he pleases, where does that end? And who is going to be controlling who in a year or two?