He finds it small - how can I help?

Question

I have a boyfriend who thinks that his penis is too small to be able to make any pleasure in a woman's body. He developed this huge obstacle in him and not wanting to put it in any more.
Any ideas how to convince him?
(He's doing stuff but not that one...)

One more thing to add: it is small but when erect I don't think there would be any problem when "inside" - I just don't know how to convince him to try it at all!

Answer 1

I think it is safe to say a lot of men feel insecure about the size of their penis, just as a lot of women are insecure about their breast size, sure the penis is not as visible but it has a lot more to do when it comes to sex where men can worry about performance – really it is not so much what they think about how women will think, more how they will measure up to other men.

Also remember men are constantly told 'Bigger is better' - you'll notice on male health sites for example a load of banners and ads for penis enlargement, imagine if they had advertisements for breast enlargement implying you can only really pleasure a man if you have huge breasts on a women's health site – people would kick off! Men don't really have that sort of empowerment and support to say that bigger isn't necessarily better.

For one point out to him that yes penis size matters, if it did not we wouldn't have such a wide range of sizes when it comes to dildos, some women do prefer a larger penis, but obviously you like him how he is – I will assume here that you love him, if so that it something else to remind him of as often as possible.

Women's bodies are built more to enjoy forms of sex other than penetrative penis to vaginal sex, if he performs well outside of penetrative sex then there is not an issue in terms of how he pleasures a woman's body. Only around 30% of women orgasm from penetrative sex, sex in other forms are more important when it comes to pleasure, perhaps it might be an idea to let him build up his knowledge and confidence in pleasuring you in other ways, let him know how much he does pleasure you before trying to get him to have penetrative sex again. Other facts and figures would be that women's vagina's often are far shorter than a man's penis, the average length of a penis is 5inches, etc.

When it does not come to pleasure it comes down to emotion, the connection between two people, remind him of this as well, don't force him to have penetrative sex with you, but talk it out with him, tell him you enjoy what he does do, you love him how he is and you like the connection you two have when you do have penetrative sex with one another.

Become a penis worshipper, I don't just mean in the bed room but in general, really appreciate what he has and soon he will come to appreciate it too – within your general life try to adopt an attitude of respect towards penises, for example avoid using the word 'small' around him, never make comments about his performance or penis that are negative, when you do talk about sex avoid 'you should' or 'you don't' instead use more positive words.

Be careful about things said or done that you might not immediately associate with the penis and when it does come down to sex get him to be very open about how he is feeling – don't let his other sexual acts work as a way for him to avoid penetration, I've known many men who do this as a way to concrete their own ideas about inadequacies with regards to their penises.

I'd also say, is he actually small? If he is you might want to praise the benefits of a small penis, take a look at places like http://www.smalldickmagazine.com for support for him, if he is average or large then think about how you may feel about your breast size or waste size – a lot of women think they are fat when they are not, the theory is the same, treat his problem in the same way as you would treat a female friend with body-issues, constantly support and compliment.

Another tip is to get him to read, not just about his body but yours as well so that he hopefully feels less inadequate about his penis and more confident about how he pleases you. A few book suggestions for the both of you, and web sites you might want to take a glance at...

Books;
Talking C*ck by Richard Herring
Dick: A User's Guide by Caroline Costa and Michele C. Moore
The Penis Book by Joseph Cohen
The Book of the Penis by Maggie Paley

Sites;
http://www.penissizedebate.com
http://www.mraverage.com
http://www.richardherring.com/talkingcock
http://www.upsaid.com/thepenis
http://www.penissizelinks.com
http://www.imagesize.com

Answer 2

Find a new BF with a bigger penis. If he thinks it's small, it probably is. Also this is probably just the tip of the iceberg so to speak, with a whole host of other insecurities he has.
Don't waist your time, move on and enjoy life with positive joyful people.

Answer 3

Okay, I'm not a guy, but I am a girl who likes other girls. Breasts, in particular. In fact, most of my guy friends think I have the brain of a guy because I always think just like them. So here goes. Breasts the size of tennis balls are a nice size and you shouldn't be ashamed of them. They've got to be about a B-cup, right? Personally, I don't like girls with really big boobs. D-Cup is fine. Anything bigger than that is just too much. Besides, girls who have boobs bigger than a D-cup are usually just fat and that's why they have big boobs. Most guys I know, feel the same way. Don't get me wrong, guys (and myself) don't usually like really small breasts, like AA-cups. But yours are definitely not small and I assure you that guys like them. And don't be ashamed to wear the WonderBra when you want to look extra sexy. I'm normally a big B or a small C (before I got pregnant) and I wear a WonderBra sometimes just to give the girls a little extra boost and look really nice in a low-cut top. So don't worry, I assure you that your boobs are fine.

Answer 4

ok my last boyfriend was like this, tell him the average size of a mans !erect !penis is 5 inches, if he is a bit smaller as long as your satisfied enjoy him. But i just told my last boyfriend to shut up and get on with it, if there is a problem you'll tell him.

Answer 5

firstly lets get one thing straight(unintended pun)are you sexually satisfied with him?if he enters you are you happy?.let me explain the size of the penis really does not matter.If you are both comfortable with what you have between you then enjoy but you should really encourage him and tell him how happy you are.let me tell you there are more men with small penises than there are with big ones the average size erect is between 4-6 inches

Answer 6

try to reasure him as much as u can.tell him that its not the size that matters its what u do with it that does. it may take some time for him 2 b convinced but be patient.good luck and i hope this helped

Answer 7

Tie him up, blind-fold him, wait till he is excited or give him the helping hand and ride him, when he realises it works well he'll shut up maoning...Either that or reassure him that it not the size of it that matters but how he uses it.

Answer 8

i doubt if you will convince him most insecure males feel this way they think if they are not splitting girl in two shes not enjoying it dump him and find a considerate lover

Answer 9

Great answer Jadea.

Answer 10

get him a penis pump, other than that all you could do is enocourage him to get back in there