i m 42, well settled in life, but depression prevails my happiness, what should i do?

Question

no finencial problem, two grown up daughters, loving husband but some kind of emptiness is there

Answer 1

Depression is more common than you might think. It dosen't mean there is anything wrong. I can simply be a chemical imbalance. In todays world thats very likely to happen. Sometime talking with a counsler may help, but sometimes you might need something from your doctor. But don't freak, it dosen't mean you would need to be on it for ever, just to help you get over this bout of depression. I am 42 also, and I went through this two years ago. I was only on the medication for 6 months. It may take trying a few to find the one that works for you, but don't give up. Also, I joined an internet support group and boy did that help. Knowing there were other folks out there that understood me and what was happening to me really helped. Reaching out to others can really be a lifesaver. I sure hoep that something here in these answers will be of help to you. If you ever feel like chatting about anything, feel free to email me. I hope you get to feeling better!!!

Answer 2

I feel for you. Depression is such a difficult thing, by turns crushing and tinting your whole life grey. However, the possibilities are exciting once you begin to battle it.

The first thing to do, as many have suggested, is to see if there's a physical cause. Our bodies are delicate biochemical instruments, and sometimes if things get just a little out of whack it can result in depression. Low blood sugar, a lack of exercise, stress, an outright physical issue - all of these can cause the rain clouds to come.

If seeing a physician doesn't result in any answers, the next thing to do is to see a counselor. See if you can explore when the depression started, when it's worst, when it seems to lift a bit.

These are things you can start to think about on your own, too. See if you can pinpoint where the emptiness is centered. Is there something you've privately been longing to do but haven't? Can you get a sense of whether the emptiness is about your job, your relationships, your education, your dreams?

When you're feeling most depressed, what are you thinking about? Try to write these things down. They may provide clues about a way out.

And I do believe there's a way out, and that once you find it - perhaps with the help of some others - the depression will begin to lift and life will feel fulfilling.

Best of luck to you!

Answer 3

It seems to me like there is something that you have NOT done yet. Was there something you put on "hold" for either your career, your husband or your daughters that YOU wanted & never got back around to doing it????
I feel that since I married later that I pretty much figured I was ready & I am VERY content at this time in my life. I pretty much DID what "I" had wanted to do, so I have no regrets.
DON'T let depression take you over. Sit down & write it all out if you have to. Are there unfullfilled dreams??? etc.
You say your husband is loving, does he also listen to you? Does he help meet your emotional needs?
LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF!! WHAT DO "I" NEED TO BE HAPPY OR TO MAKE MYSELF HAPPY??? WHAT DO I NEED TO DO OR SEE OR ???????
Good Luck!!!

I just went to read your "profile" & I noticed that one of your questions asked if women in their 40's could fall in love.......
Is that your REAL problem??? Are you in love with someone who isn't your husband & THAT is the reason for your depression??? I'm NOT judging, HONEST!!! But if that is the problem I think you need to REALLY examine your relationship with your husband. What will I lose if I decided to stay? What will I lose if I choose to leave? Do NOT have a fling!!! Affairs hurt WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE & people will ALWAYS look at you differently!!!
I am NOT speaking from personal experience on this, but I do know a friend who had a FLING!!! & she lost her husband, her kids wanted NOTHING more to do with her, nor do I. Even her mom & sisters saw her differently & treated her that way.

Answer 4

are u working?if not then that could be the problem.may be u wanted to do lots in life but ended up just taking care of the house & the kids.& now that they r independent u are left with lot of time at ur disposal & very little work.so now u dont know what to do with ur time.the daughters r grown up so they must be going for classes.so no need to teach them also.try & find some ngo in ur area.u can go & spend some time there.u can try making friends also but that wont help much bcos u can meet them only in the evening.or u can try learning some thing new.like embroidary or something like that for which u couldnt find time earlier.

Answer 5

No wonder if it happened to you.Sometimes a very Happy person is not Happy in real sense.You are falling under that category.In such situation I would advise you to read books on Philosophy or about God or do something good for under privileged people if possible or create a own group for the cause of society as we owe many things to them.However In short keep yourself busy or make a friends on net which will in turn removed your emptiness.

Answer 6

I got depressed two years ago i could hardly do anything without bursting into tears I went to doctors, guidance counselors and friends for help. I took the medicine they perscribed it helped a little but didnt make me feel the same as i did before there was still an emptyness there. I started changing parts of my life and keeping myself busy with things that satisfy me. Like work, relationships and just spare time. I know its a hard thing to deal with you just have to keep fighting it till you figure out what helps! Please get to feeling better!

Answer 7

You don't seem to have any obvious external causes. It could just be a chemical thing. Luckily, there are drugs that help. See a doctor and give it a try for a while. Often, when you get out of your depression, you start to do things which stimulate you and you can get off the drugs. It really helped my wife, and that helped our marriage and our family.

Answer 8

There certainly is some reason of depression.Its only you who knows it. So think over it. Treat tyour depression yourself.
Keep happy. Go outside the house. Do meditation. You need peace also. Love your family and devote your time in household actvities. Make friends ,never feel jealous and donot hate anybody.

Answer 9

I think you need to identify what is making you unhappy. Contact me, I am a life coach at [e-mail]. We can get through this together and help you find happiness and overcome the emptiness inside.

Answer 10

may be kind of .. menopausal syndrome or something .. i suggest you a psychiatrist help .. dont hesitate .. treatment definately helps you a lot .. its kind of stigma over consulting
a psychiatrist etc .. but its quite normal .. if u caught fever u wud go to a physician .. if ur mind caught sumthing ..go visit a psychiatrist .. as simple as that .. i hope evrythings gona work out for u ..expert help is all u needed .. they wud suggest evryhting including any drugs (if needed) counselling .. behavioural modification .. yoga .. meditation etc .. so its already late .. all the best..have fun