Why do these children want children of their own?

Question

Under-16's are to be given free contraception AND the morning after pill at school without consent of the parents. And in certain cases they can get even get abortions without their parents ever having to know.
England has the highest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe. A lot of girls are not even 16 before their 1st is born. I know of a 20-year olds with 3 kids of which 1 in primary school already!
What is happening? Why do these children want children of their own?

Oh, this was on the radio today if you wondering ...

Answer 1

My experiences have shown me one important aspect that is always overlooked when dealing with teen pregancy - I speak from experience - is a teenager's need for direction, to be genuinely needed and of course, for that love that only a child can bring, plays a large part. To be important to someone, your child, can be life changing for most people - unfortunately it comes with so many overwhelming responsibilities that it soon becomes a problem. Having a child is not like babysitting or playing with a doll - I think that is what alot of young mothers initially think. I was a young mother myself and was desperate for a child very early in life because my own family life was so disenchanting. I was lucky in that I was determined to work through all it and became a successful mother and professional person and married a wonderful man. I'm in my 40's and I still see the reasons girls do this. I think sometimes they are also trying to break away from childhood and be an "adult" but in getting pregnant, with such a complete lack of insight as to what parenting entails, show themselves to be still very much children. I think these things play a big role but there are lots of other reasons like carelessness or fear of rejection, so they go ahead and have sex with some boy when they were totally unprepared. I was left high and dry with a child that I was delighted to have tho the stigma and the strain were formidable. As a mother, a sister and person from a family of six girls, I think I've got some good insight for you. Hope it helps. Every person strongly needs to be needed, loved and be important to someone and have a definite direction to be happy and fulfilled.

Answer 2

Several reasons it could be:
They are unloved and desperately want something that will love them
They really don't understand the concept of contraception and therefore think 'it won't happen to me'
Some see it as an easy way of getting a flat, money, support from govt etc
Some don't even care and think it's great to be pushing a pushchair round town with all their little gang.
I feel sorry for all the babies born of teenage mums, I mean wot sort of life do they have ahead of them with kids for parents.
Although I am sure there are some very good teenage mums out there, where it was just an accident and having a baby has made them grow up and realise just how difficult and responsible having a child is and have learnt from this.
Teenagers ought to be making the most of their younger years, going out, enjoying themselves and working towards careers not having babies.

Answer 3

I think that there is a problem at home. Many girls want to feel loved and want to give love but if they are not getting it at home, they look elsewhere for it. Sometimes the peer pressure gets to them and they want to experience what their friends are experiencing and it just happens. I was 16 when I got pregnant and I wasn't trying to have a baby. I couldn't talk to my mother about sex because I was the oldest and she just said Don't do it! I would sneak around and oops what was done in the dark came to light! I am now 30 and my oldest is 13 and I am making sure that I handle things a lot different with her. I have to break the cycle before it starts! Talk to your children!!!

Answer 4

I disagree with some of the responses given here with regard to kids bad behaviour being the parents' fault. There is something I always say, you give birth to children but you do not make their minds. How is it that a parent can have 6 children & raise them all in the same manner & one becomes like he/she was the spawn of the devil? This is no reflection of the parent. In response to your question there are many young girls today who see it as a statement, for some reason unknown to us in the adult world, to have a baby trudging everywhere with them. Never mind they get frustrated & feel burdened, they just want to say that they have a baby. It's unfortunate that some of these babies are going to be neglected & end up in foster care or worse. I think the fact that the laws are so lax now, & these kids know it, they take pleasure in the fact that parents can no longer take the full measure of parental rights as they once used to.

Answer 5

A lot of girls become very maternal at a young age and crave something to look after. They see all these other mothers (young or not), looking happy with their babies and assume that they want one at that point in their life, whether its practical or not. Some of these mothers regret taking the plunge this early while others have no regrets whatsoever. It varies from case to case, but one thing I do not agree with is the denial of contraception for children as young as this. It is not the availability of contraception that is the problem, it is simply our ever changing society that promotes maturation in children at a younger age. Girls are more aware of fashion, body image, style, peer pressure and relationships between men and women at a much younger age. They challenge themselves to be older, to wear clothes that are too old for them, wear makeup, and push boundaries when it comes to boys. Boys themselves feel pressure to 'go along' with what the girl is prepared to do - if they 'chicken out' of doing anything, they will only be teased by their friends.

The problem is that through television, magazines and other forms of media, we are pushing the age of sexual maturation younger and younger, as children are increasingly exposed to ideas which they think they must accept and adapt towards.

Answer 6

I don't think they realize how much work children are them we they have them they don't really want them. Not all but some. I have a 20 year old friend who has 2 children. Her 2 year son was showing signs of autism and she decided she wanted another one so she quit taking her birth control without her husbands consent and now has two. She tells me shortly after she doesn't now how I manage two. Its like they don't even consider how much work it really is. They are too young. I had my first at 25 then my second at 26 which was not planned. But to plan them when you can not even handle one is insane.

Answer 7

They do not WANT to have kids. Far from it.
99% of the cases are accidents. But the one - the 20 year old with 3 kids - it is sheer ignorance. This kid needs serious talking to.

The hormones at that age are raging. The urge to merge is given by Nature. So, things happen. We can't stop that feeling.

We as adults should put corrective action in place. Sex education is the key. The teens think one has to have penetration in order to get preg. They should be taught how pregnancy occurs even in casual engagement.

Other ideas as morning after pills and contraception is a good. Abortions? well, it is controversial. I will say go for it. It is NOT a means of birth control but to avoid the ills that are associated with early, unwanted pregnancy. Society as whole benefits from it.

You cannot segregate boys and girls until they reach 20. Who is to bell the cat? It is downright impossible.

Answer 8

Contraception is good in my opinion, but should go hand in hand with education and moral teaching. The pregnancy rate would be much higher if the contraception was not available.
As to why they want them, goodness only knows, its hard enough when you're an adult and have a supporting partner, it certainly can't be an easy ride for a young teen.

Answer 9

Society in England as a whole has made it possible and not something to be ashamed of or a taboo. In other countries, it is a shameful thing. 16 yr olds should still be in school then proceed to college or the university. After graduating, they will get a job/career. Getting married and having children should come later.

Answer 10

Honest answer............benefits and council housing.

The more kids you have the bigger the house/flat you get (especially if they are different sexes).

Benefits are quite good for teenage mums too.

As a teenager who doesnt think that not having to study anymore, or work hard for anything, getting money and a mega cheap place to live (free from parents) is fantastic!

They just obviously dont think it through......sleepless nights (often no father around), expenses of children, no social life etc.

We have the highest rate of teenage pregnancies cos we give them everything they need (some even get their houses furnished, and new baby furniture for each child thereafter). Lets be realistic.....who gets all new cots, changing stands, baths, wardrobes etc for each new baby.......exactly, most of us that pay our way use hand-me-downs, but teenage mums get it all new each time (and probably sell the old stuff rather than give it back, or better still, re-use it)!!!!!

They probably wouldnt keep popping sprogs out if they didnt get all these things from the tax payers!

Sorry to be blunt, but it bugs the hell out of me! (and OK, not all teenage mums are like this, but most of them are (generally the chavs))

Kids having kids eh?!