Relationships are about sharing life & it's best with a friend. Values for a life partner are also very important. If I get all of this and get turned by her I’ll be very happy.
Typically I've been attracted 1st, 2nd got to know her as a friend, 3rd, sex & the chemicals. The chemicals kick in 4a year then I'm great at being a friend so that lasts 2years (3 yrs). Then typically there has been something wrong, i.e: shared values. This hasn’t quite clicked & end up going in different directions & splitting up with resentment
This time my approach is going to be:
1) who am i attracted to, physically, chemically, sexually?
2) what are their values, are we compatible?
3) dreams and future stuff?
4) can we be good friends?
if these are all OK then sex, because it's the sex that gets me into a relationship which isn't really going to work well long term.
Let me know what you think specially women in between ages of 28 -38 think it will work or what is wrong with the approach
2006-09-06 02:51:12 · 5 answers · asked by lifeontrack2006 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Human race has evolved so much in the last fifty years and we all want so much out of life, in the past I think sex happened and then society had you stay together even if you hated each other for decades. Life is to short for that these days.
Of course my plan is the theory, good intentions don't always hold out :). Depends upon my discipline and my ability to hold on for delayed gratificiation.
Really is this far too complicated approach, or do you think its going to work, let me know, I value your opinion.
2006-09-06 02:52:47 · update #1
I date in and around London Uk which is pretty sophisticated and I'm worried that London girls will want sex really quickly, which is great but not necessarily going to forward my plans.
Of course I love sex but first and foremost want to settle down.
2006-09-06 03:03:46 · update #2
This is the way I think a long lasting relationship works. Basically, you must have chemistry to start any kind of relationship, whether it be friends or more. And I dont mean just physical chemistry. If you are compatible and make each other happy, that is what matters at first. Being friends is very important. Understanding each other is very important. You just have to "get each other". The physical part of the relationship might not always be there at first, but once you get to know somebody you can become very attracted to them even if you were not before. You do not have to have the same goals, but be willing to help the other person achieve theirs, vise versa. If you love somebody for who they are, and love to be with somebody, the sex will be great forever.
2006-09-06 03:06:02 · answer #1 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Friends and get to really know the other person, without sex being involved. Sex distracts from objectivity.
Relationships move from interested friendship to a more serious level. Stop, evaluate whether what you both want is the same. Don't guess or assume, ASK. If moving forward with same picture in head, have a happy life. Good luck
2006-09-06 02:57:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just relax, be yourself and true love will come to you! but, the sex issue, well maybe you should hold that at the bottom of your list, think about it-maybe even till marriage! this is something special, shared with someone you truly love. good luck
2006-09-06 02:58:11 · answer #3 · answered by scott's wifey 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it should work for you, but i certainly wouldnt discuss this with a woman that you were dating right away
2006-09-06 02:53:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try putting chemistry first---if u do not have the chemistry together---then u have nothing
2006-09-06 02:55:05 · answer #5 · answered by sunbun 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋