2006-09-05 21:06:49 · 22 answers · asked by Trinity 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
and groom?
2006-09-05 21:07:16 · update #1
I'd probably consult the family of the couple that's getting married and let them decide whether to tell them right away or wait till the day after. It depends a lot on how close the dead person was to them. I wouldn't want to ruin their special day, but it also doesn't feel right to lie to them. It's a hard situation indeed.
2006-09-06 01:58:35 · answer #1 · answered by undir 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the most considerate thing to do in the circumstances would be to speak with a member of the bride or groom's family (hopefully, if available, a sister or a brother, since the mothers and fathers will often be busy with wedding preparations and would not have the time to fully think the situation through). They would be closer to the bride and groom and would be better able to determine whether the bride and groom would prefer to know about the guest before the ceremony, after the reception or after their honeymoon.
If I were the one making the decision alone on when to tell the couple, I would either let them know after the reception, if it were someone close enough that I would know they would either want to attend the funeral or change their honeymoon plans. But if I thought they were not close enough to change their plans, I would wait until after the honeymoon, but make certain that family members knew so they could send a card or flowers, or make some gesture in the new couples' names.
But there could be some couples who would prefer to know before the wedding and to possibly have a few words spoken in honor of a guest who could not make it on their special day.
2006-09-06 07:44:24 · answer #2 · answered by JenV 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, I would wait. But if you are sure the bride and groom were close enough to the guest to be upset if they went off on the honeymoon and missed the funeral, I would tell them later, at least after the ceremony, and maybe after the reception.. When in doubt, ask the bride's mom or grandma before they leave for the honeymoon.
2006-09-06 04:14:16 · answer #3 · answered by riversconfluence 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wait to tell everyone after the bride and groom leave the reception. I would not want to be the buzzkill for the wedding. Odds are the bride will find out before that. Things have away being found out.
2006-09-06 08:28:05 · answer #4 · answered by damisaunders@sbcglobal.net 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Not unless is was immediate family, like their Mum, Dad, sister or brother, I would wait and maybe tell them as they were leaving the wedding reception at the end of the evening, as they maybe going off on honeymoon, and might want to arrange a card/flowers etc if they were also not going to be able to make the funeral. I think checking first with the parents of the bride makes a good deal of sense too.
2006-09-06 04:58:14 · answer #5 · answered by Breeze 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well that's a very difficult a situation. taking into account the amount of money and energy people fork out to get hitched, i would normally not want to spoil it for them.
It will depend on how close the guest is. If their very close to the would-be married couple i'd let them know after the exchange of the vows, at least they would be already married and the others guests can go and party if the newly married choose to mourn the dead.
The food would not be wasted and the couple can well carry on with their life after the funeral of the guest.
If he/she is not too close, then i will inform them after the party.
Sorry if i am being cruel.
2006-09-06 04:17:42 · answer #6 · answered by Rosita 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It would all depend upon who it was and their relation to the bride and groom.
If it was just a friend or distant relative, probably not. But if you were the first to find out about a close friend or family member, they may want to know why that person was not there.
Unless it was critical, I would wait until after the ceremony.
2006-09-06 04:09:58 · answer #7 · answered by Searcher 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Ha ha ha ha, what if the groom died on the way to the wedding? Would you tell the bride or just let her wait there?
Ha ha ha ha ha, she would probably start complaining about what a jerk he is and then she'd say things like "This is SO like him, the bastard" and then she'd find out that he's dead and she'd break down in tears and feel really guilty for the rest of her life. Ha ha ha ha ha.
(By the by, I'm getting married on Saturday).
2006-09-06 05:35:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Yes, I love to spoile the day for any self centered witch on HER wedding day.
Now if it is the wedding day for the bride and groom, I would wait to tell them.
2006-09-06 04:10:30 · answer #9 · answered by yager19 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Yes because we should tell a true story to the bride & we should not to tell a tall tale !
2006-09-06 06:34:24 · answer #10 · answered by LATEP ! 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋