How do you get your 3 year old to stay in his own bed?

Question

My son slept in our bed til he was 2. When my second son was born I never let him sleep in our bed. So I started making the first child stay in his room. Every hour I get up putting him back. I had hoped he would have gotten the idea that we want him to stay in his own bed by now. He is 3 about to be 4 in November. Is there any special trick to help him stay in his own bed?

I started making him stay in his own bed in January of this year. Still waking up every hour putting him back.

Answer 1

No just patience. When he get up the first time tell him that it's bed time and tuck him back in bed. Second time tell him good night and tuck him back in. Third and any additional times just put him back with out saying anything. Don't get angry or talk just put him back. You will probably have to stay out side his door. If this doesn't work try sitting beside his bed but don't talk to him. Move your chair closer and closer to the door as the day go by and eventually you will be out the door.
I had the same problem with my daughter. Putting her back and leaving worked for me. The other solution worked for my sister.
With my daughter, she put all her stuffed animals in the bed and after that she never gets out. They surround her and I think it makes her feel safe.

I hope this helps.

Answer 2

I don't know, my sister in law is currently struggling with that exact same problem, but I can tell you a couple of things that may work with your boy. Make his room as comfortable for him as possible, like let him decide the decor and what things he wants on the walls or the shelves, give him the option of a nightligt or not and whether or not he wants the door open, you know little things that will make him feel okay about his room. Mainly, it seems that if you give your son an incentive to stay in his room then he might take the bait. Yes I know that technically this is bribery but as the mother of a toddler you must admit that it works. If he stays one night in his room then let him go and pick out a new movie or something, if he makes it a week then take him to do whatever he wants and continue praising him for his progress, make sleeping in his own bed fun. I can't say for sure if it has worked or not but my neice is doing much better than she was. Good luck and I hope you sleep better soon.

Answer 3

That's a hard habit to break mom. It's why parents are always told NEVER let your child sleep with you. They develop strong insecurity issues and are often afraid of being alone. There are quite a few things you can do to help him.

First, lay on his bedroom floor in the dark and look around the room. Remove anything that looks even remotely scarey. Then for a few nights, sleep on his floor next to his bed. A few more nights, closer to the door. Then a few more nights in your room with the door open and you in your own bed. Before bedtime, have a special quiet time just for him. Don't make a big production out of it. A simple story and firmly say bed time. If all this fails, he is old enough to work on a reward system. Say if he makes it through one night, he gets extra special time with just mommy playing a game. If he makes it through another, maybe a trick to the park. Eventually his sleeping in his own bed, is going to become a habit as his body begins to adjust to the new sleeping pattern.

I wish you well.

Answer 4

you may think this silly, but it works... put your son to bed in his own room, with the kisses and all, then sit on the floor , or even lay, doesn't matter, about 4 feet from him. ( of course with the light off). just sit there, totally ignore him, this is very important, no eye contact, no talking, nothing. i find it easier to hang my head with my eyes closed. he may cry and throw a fit, that's okay, ignore him. The only time you acknowledge him is when he gets out of bed. Then you simply (still no eye contact, or talking) put him back into bed, and return to your sitting position. You may have to put him back in bed several times, but he will eventually go to sleep. The key is to not talk to him or look at him. Then the following night , repeat the same thing but sit a little closer to the door, each night, repeat the same thing until eventually you are out of the room. This may take a while, and a lot of patience, especially if he is carrying on like you are trying to kill him or something. Be strong, this technique has worked for me on my 3 kids and their kids as well. Good Luck

Answer 5

He must be getting mixed messages about it. Please be very compassionate with him....create a ritual that soothes him..what is his favorite book or story? ....Give him a bath every nite before bedtime and make it fun, put on his favorite pj's, go read a story with the favorite blankie...It sounds time consuming but in no time he will be staying in his bed!! He needs a set routine to feel comfort and secure in his bed. Reward him when he does well with praise the next morning. Tell him how big he is. He may be feeling lonely also now there is a new little one.

Answer 6

Well, try talking to him and find out why he wants to sleep with you. Explain that he has a bed of his own to sleep in. Have you tried to lay next to him and then wait till he falls asleep to leave. Or.....how about letting him have some old PJ's of yours. Perhaps they will provide the security he is seeking as he comes to your room ( we used this when ever my grandson was to spend the night and it really worked). As things get better and better ( his sleeping in his own bed longer), you should recognize his effort and make him feel special for his accomplishment. Remember, all children develop as their own pace. Continue making every effort to communicate with your son and really listen to his reasons why. That should help you to decide what to do. Best of luck!

Answer 7

Duct tape.......

Actually just reinforce your stand. He gets out of bed....put him back in his own bed with a explanation. Yes it will be tiring, but in the long run a pay off.

Do not offer rewards, he may use this as a form of extortion or bribe for future good behavior. But take away a favored thing or item for bad behavior, with the promise of return for positive behavior.

Answer 8

keep putting him back to bed..... and maybe use a trick or 2...... make a special stay in bed, be a big boy basket or box.... put small inexspensive treats, such as small toys, books, fruit roll ups, and IF he stays in his bed , he gets one in the morning.... make it clear that you want him to stay in his bed because he is older and growing up.......tell him baby brother sleeps in his own bed too.... tell him that if he stays in his bed for a few night, use language and words he understands, he will get a special treat.... such as a game or trip to the movies.... think about what suits him and your life styles..... you and dad will have to stick together on this issue, so talk it over......... God bless

Answer 9

Just keep putting him back in his bed. Explain that what his bed is and what your bed is. It will take time because you allowed him to feel your bed was his and now he most likely can not understand.

Don't get mad. Keep bringing him back to his bed telling him that what is his bed. Give him a kiss tell him you love him and you return to your bed alone.

Again this will take time and you need to be strong and keep your temper. Remember it is not his vault that he thinks your bed is his.

Answer 10

you do not bother with him. if you ever watch those nanny shows, they do not give them an option and the ignore the child. They child will get tired and have no choice. It may be hard the frist few nights, but after a week it will be the norm