my 5yr boy is stealing amd lying at school?

Question

Need help my 5yr boy has started lying at school and stealing.
He got caught stealing some ones lunch and his excuse was my mum don’t make me lunch which is so not true who would send there kid to school with out lunch any so I thought it was because they had nicer lunch than him, so I made sure he had a lot a food and all yummy to eat but didn’t work he still told the teacher that I didn’t make him lunch so the teacher had to make him some. And every now and then he brings something home from school that’s not his and has no reason for having it. It thought it was attention seeking but not I give him my full attention I’m at my wits ends and its so shame when I hear from other mums that my son doesn’t get feed
How do I stop him lying and I don’t approve of beating my kids vilnes is never the way

sorry cant spell Violins

i have punished him he has no tv no toys and just a bed in his room at the mo and the school has only 20 kids in it and the teachers say hes not get picked on and his dad is around he wants to chop off his fingers its getting that bad(but he wont but u no what i mean)

Answer 1

Maybe it's an authorital issue. Sometimes kids don't take authority seriously...

a LIGHT spank isn't violence.
I think it's necessary that a kid knows that something bad will come if he does something bad.

This could also be a moral issue.

Answer 2

When your son behaves like that you shouldn't be worried about the behavior more than your son.What happens in this boy's life?Find out.There could be so many reasons.First of all,stop punishing him and give him back his toys.Punishing doesn't work as you can see.Now imagine if older kids steal his lunch and he is afraid to tell you or tell the teacher so he blames you because he is sure you won't harm him if you know he has blamed you.But if he tells about the older children,he may be afraid they will beat him.I don't say that it is the problem(I'm sure it can be everything) but that's one suggestion which helps you imagine what may happen in your son's head.Talk to him.don't blame,criticize or ashame him.Just ask 'curious' questions and don't be worried.The child will feel if you want to blame him only.Just ask him something like "I need your help.Can you help me understand me why do you say at school that you don't have lunch since I have made you?"(don't forget - you are just curious and smiling) or "I was thinking about the 'lunch-problem' and I have some suggestions.Do you want to talk about that?",then you say "When 'goes' your lunch when you say the teacher you don't have one?" and other like that.But remember - the boy must feel that you are just curious and won't punish him again.He may also do it because he is mad(of all these punishments) and he saw that if he does it,that's a real problem for you.So,now he has a 'weapon'.He knows how to make you mad if you punish him.And he may seek attention.He has found a way to conquer your attention.If you punish him,now he has a way to revenge.Think about all it.Maybe he doesn't need punishments and he needs positive discipline.Buy some books to read about discipline and you may find how to cope with such kind of situations.If you need more information about positive discipline or want to ask something about your case,write me - [e-mail] The answer will be quick:)

Answer 3

Well, from what I see of how people raise kids these days, it ain't a big wonder! I don't believe in beating a child but, when I was a youngin, if you bit, you got bit back! If you broke things, you got your things broke! When you got sassy, you got a backhand across the mouth, not a hard one, but enough to know you didn't do that! When you were bad, you got one slap across the bare *** that you didn't forget! And people wonder why kids grow up like they do today......too many parents try to reason their way through this crap and it ain't workin! You don't reason with a kid! Your the boss or have some of you forgot that? The whole shift towards the new methods were due to some people abusing their children.....look around....has the abuse stopped? Don't think so! The new methods didn't quell this problem a bit! It DID however create a new generation of disrespectful monsters! I might add, go back to the old methods and watch ADD and ADHD disappear! Get a grip on that kid now or you never will!
P.S. I personally dont care how you raise your child but beware! If you dont wake up and smell the roses lady, it will be far worse as time goes on! Its time to stop pampering and babying his little butt!

Answer 4

I think children young like your son might just be acting up.Has there been a big change in your lifestyle for instance a divorce, a move to another city where he knows no one, a death in the family or someone really close to him etc.It seems like he has some sort of misdirected anger and sorry to say it seems like it is directed toward you. Maybe again I can be wrong.

Another thing too, how do you handle it when he misbehaves like this??? Sometimes parents can be too good that it becomes a detriment to their kids. Funny, but sometimes when parents do not really put down their foot , the kids feel that they are not really loved because there are no consequences to their action.

I hope you all the luck . please find a way to nip the problem before it is too late. Have you spoken to his pediatrician. Maybe she can direct you to the right person to help you out. GOOD LUCK

Answer 5

I agree with the poster who said to take your child to a Child Therapist. There is something underneath that is causing this issue. Lying is a serious problem that requires therapy. This doesn't need spanking.

Talk with the teacher...she should already know that he brings a lunch, unless he is losing it or throwing it away before he gets to class. Tell her he brings one from home and have her double check for it when he gets there. Get to the bottom of where his lunch is once he gets to school. She needs to let you know what's happening on her end. Communication with his teacher is essential in helping to resolve this problem.

I had a son who would stash his homework somewhere and say he didn't get any and his teacher would say I sent it home with him. I later found it pushed under the seat of my car amongst other places.

I don't condone spanking for just anything. But I do believe in it when you need a drastic response for a serious infraction...such as endangering their safety...i.e. crossing a busy street without you.

FYI I..... had a Juvenile Court Judge tell me to take my son home and spank him...just not leave permanent marks or bruises and to use an open hand, 3 swats. Spank on the butt not the face.

Answer 6

if he is stealing try making him give who ever he stole from something of his so he will know how it feels to lose some thing stealing is a hard habit to break make sure there a consequences to his actions and remember he is five he doesn't really know what is going on you could try calling the teacher and have her check his bag every day so she knows its there or just buy the school lunches for him then they will know the truth it s more healthy then giving him the treats he wants .if all else fails there are other punishments

Answer 7

why no longer quite scare the sh*t out of him do not beat him merely ask the safe practices gaurd in college or the regular to call the police officials next time he does it or in case you recognize a cop ask them to pass to college that day and watch if he's not eating pbj for lunch that you packed him then have the cop arrest him and take him all the way down to detention middle even even if it really is until eventually eventually you get there they could have him crying and could under no circumstances attempt this back also you'd be practise different childrens that it is not precise to thieve interior the approach and that i guess your son will quit stealing if that doesn't paintings then beat him reason if the police officials and getting srrested cant replace him then you opt to finish somewhat searious training at domicile i'm confident maximum police officials will be prepared to attempt this for you in case you clarify to them that you've tried each and every thing and are at a lost and also you do not desire him to be a theif latter in life if a cop understand s that they are helping someone replace now even as they're youthful it is going to advise they wont ever see them back and do not agonize in the journey that they e book him it really is in worry-free words a misdimeaner and could be off his record through the time he turns 18 strong success and desire it quite works i understand it takes curage yet trust me he will be scared did it with my 6 year previous lady who had a simular situation and he or she doesn't even imagine about taking without asking now strong success also because it really is so on the point of halloween you should employ a police officials uniform and performance a buddy who your son doesn't understand like some one which you paintings with to pass and act like a cop merely undergo in recommendations the hand cuffs strong success

Answer 8

You need to punish him. Take away TV, video games, toys, etc until he learns that lying is not acceptable. If you do not get to the bottom of this it will only get worse. Is it possible that he is having a hard time adjusting to school? Is he being picked on? When a child is being picked on in school they will act out. Find out first before punishing him if this is the problem.

Answer 9

I totally agree with DR. HOUSE, but, there are these "advocates" who will turn you in for the slightest little tap!!!! These type of people are the ones who make it hard for us to discipline our children like they should!!!!!! I hate these people because they turn in the ones who give their kids a good swat and the ones who really get beat--no one pays attention to them!! How twisted is that???? I have the same probs with my son and that boy gets his hiney tore up--but not "beat"..... I just think that we need to get back to the old days when children actually respected their parents and there wasn't some Child Services breathing down their neck!! Good Luck!!

Answer 10

what a shame
try and speak to his teacher.
Hand the lunchbox to his teacher in the morning, and at break and lunch time allow the teacher to open the box in front of the class and ask your son what he would like to eat first.
or meet him at lunchtime and have lunch together and explain to him that u have to do this cos he is lying all the time.

Answer 11

Where is his father? It seems like he needs some kinda of male influence in his life. Seems like he lacks in the respect category. He just needs a good male influence in his life, if his father is not there, and is not a good influence believe me he's probably a lot better off with out him, but maybe he can have your father or a brother as an influence instead!