It's normal to hate your parents. Now what?

Question

My parents and I have not always gotten along. My brother demands their attention. Right now, he's getting D's in school, not doing any chores (he doesn't have any) and barely passing schoolwork. My parents do "school" with him every night, and it's usually an hour and a half. With them BOTH.

Meanwhile, I babysit my three other brothers and sisters, take them places (with the help of my parents), get average grades, do my schoolwork, and hours of countless time has been given to me. No. It hasn't. I never get my parents both together, I have to do all the babysitting and don't get paid squat, (barely anything), and I overall have no idea what to do.

WHAT SHOULD I DO?
Please be serious and note that talking & running away are both out of the picture.

Should I demand their attention or sit plainly in the corner, waiting to be seen well silently brooding my anger? I am 16 (going to get my temps next weekend.)

Parents, what would you do? Teenagers, what would you do?

Getting worse -.-

Answer 1

It's not wrong that you want more of their attention, but I have to say that I'm sure your parents REALLY appreciate you being so responsible. And I'm sure your responsiblity will pay off in the long run, like when you want to go out and do something...they might would actually let you go because they trust you. They're focusing all the attention on your brother because it sounds like he needs help. Purposefully adding to their problems but unnecessarily crying out for attention. I would just want some payoff for helping out with your siblings so much. I'd go up to them and say "Since I babysat this week, can I go out to the mall?" or whatever it is that you want to do. Maybe even get a job as a way to just get out of the house for a little while, you know? Then you can save up some money and do with it what you want. MANY people use their jobs as a way out of situations they don't want to be in. Good Luck.

Answer 2

What's wrong with your brother that he demands their attention? Does he have a disability?

If there is truely something wrong with your brother and he need the special attention then you shouldn't be complaining. I'm sure your parents do as best as they can.

Either way, I would ask your parents for a minute of their time to talk privately then share your feelings with them. I'm sure they would like to know if you have been feeling left out or hurting in any way. I don't think they do it on purpose.

And, do not do anything bad. That may get your parents attention, but it's still bad attention. Would you rather have their love or be on restriction for a bad attitude?

Answer 3

I think it is normal. Tell your parents that you need one on one time too. If talking is out of the question, then I suggest you let it go. Brooding won't change anything and neither will holding on to the anger. Instead try spending your time applying yourself to schoolwork and extracurricular activities so you don't end up at home babysitting so much.

Answer 4

write a note on how you feel. Words seem to make you feel better just by writing them down and leave it in a card or bowl of flowers. Kindness gets you better attention than does anger. They will just relash.. Really this works, sit down write a letter about how you are feeling, tell you folks that your only a kid once and they are molding you into the person you are becoming. Then say, you need there attention because you don't like what your seeing.. ANd it will spark conversation on a positive note and by picking or buying the flowers, or in something else it will work. Darlin, good luck to you. Read your bible too. Lots of attention is paid to you by God, you just have to listen.

Answer 5

Quit your boo hooing.
sure youd love some recognition but others need more help then others.I bet your parrents are releaved and proud of you,your dependable reliable helpful mature enough to leave your siblings in your hands they know your capable a quick learner.Those are things to be proud of of your self.
There is a lesson to learn here---it isnt about you but what you can do for others and not have to be reconized for it.
I know we all want to but in the end it isnt all that importent when you sinceily do and give for the sake of others and the good of the team or family or community.we make a big mistake when we do things exspecting a just reward.
And the best thing you can do other then talking maturly and honestly to your parents is just live your life doing and being the best you can,putting others first and looking out for the welbeing of others and youll be more respected and apreciated then youll know and youll be the better person for it.Building good charicter qualities and life long ways of good persoality traits and habbits.
But also be honest withyour self and do heart checks to be and stay sinceire.God knows a persons true heaqrt and intentions.
When you stand before Christ on judgement day he will hold the scales of justicde in his hands and he will say well done at this or that and he will give you your just reward in the end if not in your life time of blessings.

Answer 6

I went thru this phase when I was about your age. could not stand my parents, thought anything would be better. Talking did not help, brooding did not. Its seemed liked I fought with my mother non stop. it did not get better. I think all teens or most have to go thru this. It is a growing process, we are reaching for our independence, yet we cling to our parents for approval and guidance,not wanting it when they offer. Trust me, in a few years this will pass...yes it is very difficult. But after the "growing pains" my Mom became my best friend. We are still close. Now, my daughter is feeing these growing pains. I can see the difficulty in her emotions when dealing with me. Like she doesn't like me miuch right now. And I am a good Mom., would do anything for her. No easy answer, except to say....life truly will get better. Its just so tough getting there, but get there you will. I promise.

Answer 7

You hate your parents for having too many kids and making you babysit. You feel like they are taking advantage of you and stealing your childhood. When my mother had twins my father told her that I was not her private nanny and she would have to take care of them by herself. He said this because he was the oldest in his family of 6 children and had to take care of the little ones. I suppose this is how it is in larger families. You are feeling jealous of your siblings. You have a right to be. So you have an aunt or grandparent that has time to spend with you? Join some clubs, get a hobby and study more (average grades are really not good enough in today's world) Good Luck

Answer 8

You do not see it now and may not believe me, but this is making a better person out of you. It is making a wonderful person of you. Yes, I see you point. Maybe while Mom is fixing supper, you could go in and give her a big hug, tell her you love her and could she give you a few minutes sometime. Sneek in beside your dad sometime and tell him the same thing. They really do not realize what they are doing. They love you very much but are so caught up in other problems (your brother for one) that they do not realize that you are there because they know that you will come through and are responsible. Good luck. Smile.

Answer 9

I would demand there attention but in a decent way. I would tell them I am here also. I didnt ask you to have me, but you did, so please dont push me into a corner or make me feel used and worthless. I am a human being also and have feelings and dreams. Dont shut them or me out. I want a relationship with you both of you and most of all I want to feel like part of this family.




I left home and married at 16 for a similar reason and let me tell you it wasnt much better. My husband left me for another woman 1 yr after our first son was born and we fought alot. Try to work it out for you otherwise hold tight till you finish school then hunny make a better life for yourself.

Answer 10

Sounds like maybe your parents are overcompensating for your Brother. I'm sure your parents appreciate your responsible nature. And to be sure, find a diplomatic way of asking them that without pointing out your Brother's deficiencies.