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How do I support them and keep myself from worring at the same time? They all tell me that they know what they are doing and they will come home safely but it never comforts me. What do I do and how do I help them out?

2006-09-05 14:59:38 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government Military

And one of them is also my boyfriend.

2006-09-06 15:42:52 · update #1

I dont want people like What Attitude? answering this question I dont know how she came to that conclusion (if anyone knows please tell me) but I really want to support them while they are gone because a lot of them already left. Thanks again

2006-09-07 12:29:23 · update #2

27 answers

Sounds like they are not being totally realistic to themselves. They might very well not make it home. It's just a harsh fact, especially if they are all sent to Iraq.

I dated someone in the Navy, I worried too while we were dating. He was in Desert Storm. All you can do it take it one day at a time, pray if you pray, and send them letters to try and keep their spirits up. A care package once in a while is always appreciated. Just make sure you check about what you can or cannot send.

When my late husband was in desert storm he said they weren't allowed to chew bubble gum over there or were a certain color. You never know what "rules" they have to go by in other countries.

2006-09-05 15:03:52 · answer #1 · answered by Voice 4 · 3 2

First off I know where you are I grew up basically on a military post and know many many men in the army. First off worry if you must, it's natural but don't let it show too bad, cry if you must throw a temper tantrum but be strong in front of them, always support them. If they get deployed to Iraq or stationed overseas, send letters, emails, packages the smallest stuff counts. And they do know what they are doing they are going to be trained very well (we are the best trained military in the world) and yes they can say they are going to come home but it's not a sure thing as you know but we've lost about 2700 men and women over there, I know people that have been on their third tour so at any one point we've had more men over there that the percentage of times over there and men it's a very very small percentage that anything will happen. And if you are to ask any veteraned troop, the best training for a soldier is to get them green in the boots meaning that the best way to train for war is to stick them right in and learn that way. If you plan on moving with your boyfriend to the base he is stationed then there is always family support groups and counciling to help any issues and if you aren't and still can't take it then talk to someone be it a preacher, counsiler, family, friend, or even a recruiter to maybe help you with the ins and outs of what he could be going through. But always be strong for him and support his descions.

2006-09-10 13:54:13 · answer #2 · answered by am i a mom 2 · 1 0

To support them: write letters, send e-mails, send care packages, if they call talk to them. When they come home go out and have a good time. Just show them that you are a friend and you really admire/appreciate what they are doing or did.

And answering about what attitude said:
There are a lot of people who just hang out with military members to sleep with the whole barracks...barracks hos. They hang around with military and go from one member to the next. Don't take it personal...remember this is the Internet, these people don't know you. So who cares what they say!

2006-09-09 17:12:23 · answer #3 · answered by fin 3 · 0 0

What do you want to do?

These gentlemen all made career decisions about how they want to conduct their life. The things they do, the places they go and the people they meet while in the military will help them to grow into productive, disciplined and successful individuals. There are also benefits associated with military service such as college tuition money, which most people know about. For me personally , I would never have been able to afford to buy my own home without the help of that "no down payment" G I loan.

If I were to meet these gentlemen in person I would shake each ones hand and would say "Thank You" for your sacrifice and service to the country.I am comforted to know there are so many fine young men and women, such as your self, who are willing to keep watch over the country. My family and I can sleep safe and sound at night over here, because of what you and others like you are doing over there.

What do you do? Be proud of them and tell them so.

ps: There is no one stronger and more confident that military wives and girl friends..

2006-09-11 12:46:44 · answer #4 · answered by Peedlepup 7 · 1 1

Believe them, write letters, send packages. My husband is in the Military, and he gave me the crash course on being supportive, and that's the main thing you can do. Don't talk about how worried you are for their safety, and don't talk about how much you miss them. Tell them you're proud of them, and update them on things that are happening. It's a little scary at times, but when I realized that his safety wasn't in my hands, I calmed down a lot. They'll be fine. Oh, and Pray. That's a huge one.

And as for the girl who posted above me, that was not a helpful answer. They're grown men, and they'll do as they feel is right. You should be thankful there are men who volunteer so you can live here and feel safe.

2006-09-06 00:02:12 · answer #5 · answered by PoisonSoomac 2 · 1 0

Congratulate them on their bravery and willingness to support their country.

Nothing can eliminate worry except your own mind. Keep in touch with them; that is probably the best support...a letter from home.

---

To the person that gave this question a thumbs down. You are a disgrace.

Are you so blinded by your ideology that you can't read and understand the question? Do you see the words military and support and immediately hit that thumbs down? It was not a question about Iraq, Islam, Bush, terrorists or immigration. You are more than a disgrace. You are a traitor to humanity.

2006-09-05 22:12:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3 0

My husband is also in the military serving down range in Iraq, just be very supportive, they are grown enough to make their own decisions, send care packages when you can, and write alot of letters, that is one of the most important things to do, most of the soldiers have internet access, so e-mailing and IM are good sources to use to keep in contact. Just let them know you stand behind them, and are praying for their safe return.

As for the other military wife's entry above mine, it is so important to let them know you miss them, if you don't then most men (or women) won't think you care that they are even gone. I make it a point to tell my husband how much I miss him and want him to come home.

2006-09-06 06:54:43 · answer #7 · answered by battleswife 1 · 1 0

They seem to know what they're doing and what's in store for them. Why do you think they need your help at this point and time?

Worry, is a useless pastime, there's nothing you can do to change anything by worrying, so get past it!

About the only thing I suggest you do, is keep the letters from home coming, on a regular basis. If there's one thing that's really important to grunts, it's mail from home. Keep it upbeat, and make sure that when they're done reading your letters, they feel good about it. In the meantime, get a hobby, or a dog, or a b/f. Anything that will keep your mind from dwelling on your friends.

2006-09-05 22:10:22 · answer #8 · answered by briang731/ bvincent 6 · 1 0

Honestly, there is no way to keep yourself from worrying. I say send plenty of letters, daily if at all possible, and e-mail constantly. When my sister would call and tell us she was going on another convoy the entire family would be on pins and needles. But then we'd get a forwarded junk mail message from her and we knew she made it back safely. You can goto the family support center on base as well, they have a lot of resources and you can meet other people in your same situation. It does help to know others who REALLY understand your concerns. Send plenty of care packages, and keep your phone close by. hope this helps.

2006-09-11 01:45:01 · answer #9 · answered by azile_wehttam 3 · 0 0

Statistically, they are much safer in the military than participating in many other activities I've seen young men engage in.

The best thing that you can do for them, and for yourself, is writing letters. It sounds super simple, but when you're away from home and everyone you love, even a little card or note can totally make your day. It reconnects them to "reality" and gives you a way to let them know that you are thinking of them. It also is much better than e-mail as they can keep it with them to re-read on a crappy day.

I've even "enlisted" my younger siblings and their buddies to send letters to soldiers friends of mine were stationed with that didn't get much mail.

It will also give you an outlet as you want to keep them fun and positive so it keeps your thoughts in that vein.

Just know that they may not have time to write back, but it will be appreciated.

2006-09-05 22:12:33 · answer #10 · answered by T.I. 3 · 0 0

send them treats in the mail when they are deployed. that helped me. as for the worry. sorry, the toughest job for military personnel is for the ones left at home. you have to just try keeping in touch with them and at least support them and be strong. form a group of people who all know them and have a get together once a week or month and make things for them. things like that. good luck to your friends. I am out of the military in six months for most of those reasons. it is too hard on the ones left at home worrying about you.

2006-09-05 22:06:52 · answer #11 · answered by hey you 3 · 2 0

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