I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old. They like to play make-believe a lot but lately I get tired of a certain sort of play they do. They start off with a story and want me to be a character in the story. That much is OK. But they they do this "OK mommy now say this" "OK mommy now say that." and if I try to make up my own part of the story they say "no, you're supposed to say this."
I played it for a week or two and now I'm really not into it and have told them I don't want to play it quite like that any more. I would rather either let all of us make up our own parts or play a different game.
I also noticed that last time my daughter's friends were over she tried to do that to them and it ended up with everyone being frustrated.
I'd rather play kitchen or trains or play with their other toys. I don't want to keep her from using her imagination but I don't know how to play in this way without getting annoyed.
Any feedback?
2006-09-05 13:26:18 · 15 answers · asked by Faith 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I'm not saying I don't like playing with my kids. I just said I didn't like this particular game.
I love playing other games with them.
2006-09-05 14:12:56 · update #1
This is an excellent opportnity to instruct them on fair play, reciprocity, and social skills. Even play can be a time to learn, and it's your job to teach them! Tell them that they wouldn't like it if you told them everything to do and say when playing, and let them know that it's not okay to be "bossy" with their friends, either. I think it'd great that you play with them, but teach them, too.
2006-09-05 19:58:52 · answer #1 · answered by wendy g 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your little girl is too bossy for her own good. Tell her that it's a lot more fun when everyone gets to contribute to the story. Make a deal with her: she gets to play one, and only one story her way, and then everybody else gets their turn to do the same thing. Offer her a special privilege AFTER a successful playtime, when everyone has been able to have their way at least once. Don't avoid this issue by playing other games, your daughter needs to learn to give and take, or else she will become a bully later on, and make life unbearable for those around her.
2006-09-05 20:40:30 · answer #2 · answered by Chatelaine 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find her a friend or a reletive her age remember if there are no other kids then you are all she has. Give her some barbies and tell her that she can make up the voices for each diff doll. This will allow her to have them say and do what she wants them to. Also try to include her in the household chores take charge and let her think that it is a game or race but have her help you clean. Tell her that you want to play mommy games and that is your turn this will also help when she has friends over and they say that they want to do it. I was a pre-k teacher and it always works to let them think that they are doing what they want to do like pretend but make sure your in controll.
2006-09-05 20:32:46 · answer #3 · answered by Mrs.Hobbs 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you're a much more patient mom than me. I just say "no mommy is tired and doesnt want to play anymore! LOL
I think you have to turn it around on them too so they know what it feels like to be treated the way they do too.
It's up to you how much time you're willing to spend with them. If you want more time to yourself you have to find a way to keep them occupied with other things. My kids loved music, tapes, singing, videos, and computer games believe it or not. They were playing learning games on the computer as early as 2 and you know what? They're all gifted now...so something to be said for getting those little minds to work early. :~)
2006-09-05 20:48:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not a bad mother at all. It's perfectly normal to not want to play make-believe with a child that's controlling. It's also very normal for a child to be controlling at her age. A suggestion of mine would be to go ahead and talk to her about it at a time that she wouldn't be distracted. Use big words, and allow her to ask you what they mean.
You can also play make-believe on the way to the store, in the store, on the way to school, at the park--anywhere will work! Just be sure to remind the children that you don't appreciate it when they tell you how to do things, and it makes you feel pretty crummy. I'm sure they'll understand.
2006-09-05 20:39:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My kids did that to me too, and I got really tired of it really fast. I just started improvising and telling them what to say. When they said that they didn't like it, I explained that's how others feel. I've seen less and less play like that. My kids are 17, 9 and 5. They'll grow out of it.
Oh, you're not a bad mom, use it as a teaching moment.
2006-09-05 20:36:51 · answer #6 · answered by MamaSunshine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should enjoy playing with your kids. Focus on the joy your kids get from the game not your own. You're not really bad. Just lacking enough patience which is a shortcoming.
2006-09-05 20:39:07 · answer #7 · answered by Romeo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not a bad mom.
parenting is not supposed to be easy and you don't have to be a part of all their games because you ARE an adult and not a child.
You know her best, so you decide if she needs to be more flexible or whether you need to just see it as a bossy stage.
You're NOT a bad mom.
2006-09-05 21:04:34 · answer #8 · answered by Marcelle S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have some fun.
Get a tape recorder.
Get some comics.
Each one take the part of one of the characters.
Each read the parts into the recorder with expression in ones voice.
Play it back.
2006-09-05 20:35:01 · answer #9 · answered by ed 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is terribly boring, they really need to spend time (especially when they get into that mode) with others their age.
Use that as an excuse to leave the room and hit the Jack Daniels
Where's the hubby? Need one?
2006-09-05 20:29:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋