In The gospel of the flying spaghetti monster it says that you must accept his noodliness to be saved. WHY DO U REFUTE? He is the only way. Christians will not get beer volcano and stripper also. The gospel of the FSM clearly says 'Ye shall not hold other gods before me.' That includes the christian lord, why do you feel you are above him? When you meet his noodliness in the afterlife what will you tell him? I'm sry I didn't believe in you now give me my beer volcano??? I DONT THINK SO BUDDY!
Just accept the FSM in your heart and you will be saved.
RAmen!!!
2006-09-05 11:36:22 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
How can I know.....the gospel of the FSM states it quite clearly. not really up for discussion. I also can feel it in my heart.
2006-09-05 11:39:34 · update #1
The bible says the world is in eternal hell because some guy ate an apple...how can I take tht seriously?
2006-09-05 11:43:29 · update #2
gospel of FSM=Much more sensible. I would repent if I were you guys.
2006-09-05 11:45:03 · update #3
It's incredibly sad how much stupidity goes on here!
2006-09-05 11:40:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 5⤋
Top Ten Signs You're a Fundamentalist Christian
10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.
9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.
8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God
7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!
6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.
5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.
4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."
3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.
2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.
1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian
2006-09-05 20:19:48 · answer #2 · answered by Leilani L 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ramen brother, Ramen. I'm still waiting on my copy of the Gospel of the FSM, so do me a favor and see if there's anything in there about being able to make a special request in regards to which stripper we get... I there is, I want â¥Mira⥠to be my stripper... :)
2006-09-05 22:27:29 · answer #3 · answered by elars1989 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't like beer.Is there an eternal lake of wine?That would be more my style and worth believing in something again.I will beg the FSM for forgiveness if I can have wine with my pasta.I mean,they do go better together...
I will even give up pizza.I have always preferred spaghetti,anyway.Especially since I first learned to spell it correctly.
2006-09-05 18:40:10 · answer #4 · answered by kimberli 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
ROFLMAO! Dude you got some freakin issues. Oh, and if you beleive as the wicca, as I do. All paths lead to god. Oh, yeah, even the Gospel of the flying spaghetti monster will get you there eventually, if that's what you put your faith in. So don't threaten eternal damnation, no one wants to know that, because they probably already know about it!
2006-09-05 18:41:14 · answer #5 · answered by ianr1984 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The Flying Spaghetti Monster is a false God.
Worship Vegemite - it's the spackle that holds the universe together. It's older than dirt and can be found everywhere.
2006-09-05 18:41:01 · answer #6 · answered by Lunarsight 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Even the Flying Spagetti Monster can`t convince me that there is a hell.
2006-09-05 18:45:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first what u are saying is mad rude. as a christian and this goes for all people god gave us a free will. if u don't believe in him, that's u but others might. plus what u are writing is blasphemy. u should accept all people because he creative all of us equally and god wants us to respect one another and as it says in the bible " love thy neighbor as u would love thy self."
2006-09-05 18:48:46 · answer #8 · answered by Johnny Lovely 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Mmmmm Beer Volcano... *drooling*... aaaagggggggg...
How can I forget, every day I'm on R&S, someone reminds me...
2006-09-05 19:41:28 · answer #9 · answered by Kenny ♣ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope everyone gets touched by His noodly appendage!
RAmen
2006-09-05 18:42:50 · answer #10 · answered by Miss. Bliss 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i was planning on spending my after life in the Valhalla Spa and Resort with other vikings ...but what the heck...i like beer better.
2006-09-05 18:43:40 · answer #11 · answered by iv 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋