well my mom told me my dad want my dad and i just dont understand what to do i love my dad but now i look at him diffrent because he knew about it and i didnt grow up with him because there devorced but i need help on how to handle this i dont know what to say when people ask bout my dad what am i sopposed 2 say which one or what dad HELP!!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-05 11:06:51 · 13 answers · asked by sunnie 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I'm sorry but my dad died when i was 1 turning 2 and to make it even worse it was on Valentines Day so i hate valentines day and i have no dad. When ppl ask me about my dad i simply tell them that he is not in my life but luckily for you you have a some what of a dad a form of one at least so when people ask you just say who ever is most like a dad for you also they will never know hes not your dad and i know your heart is going through alot of different emotions right now so if you ever want to talk e mail me!!!
always here for you
2006-09-05 11:20:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you grew up thinking and feeling like this was your father, why should things change. Whether he is your real father or not, was he always a DAD to you? I am assuming your real father wasnt around all you life because you didnt know about him, so why should he change things. I understand that this would be a shock but the bottom line is, that you shouldnt let this make your relationship with your dad change. People dont need to know your business either. Why drag out a bunch of stuff that's nobodies busy, if they ask about your dad. What did you say before you knew the situation? Why should your answer change now?
2006-09-05 11:19:38 · answer #2 · answered by edge 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This must be very upsetting and confusing to you and I'm sorry for the pain you're going through. But remember this... we don't all get the greatest dad's or mom's with the mother of the year award. What really, truly matters is how the people who love you treat you and how you treat the people you love. It's that simple. Believe this all your life. Live your life maturely, responsibly, and honestly. When people ask you about your dad, tell them about the dad you know and love. Rejoice in the fact that your stepfather loves and respects you. It's all ok, if YOU make it ok.
2006-09-05 11:19:57 · answer #3 · answered by mJc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's going to take a while for this to settle down in your head and start making any sense at all. Don't rush yourself. Know that being a "real father" isn't about who contributed the sperm to the egg. The man who helped raise you and was there for you is your "real father". The term for the other guy is your "biological father", and there's no need for you to call either one of them anything different than you always have unless you want to. Good luck, and I'm sorry you had to go through this....
2006-09-05 11:15:59 · answer #4 · answered by wrennightwind 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand why you'd be confused having a secret like this dumped on you. It altered the truths of your life and that is a confidence shaking experience. Here's what I think, FWIW.
Your dad is the man who was there to help your mother raise you, the man who spent time with you, the man who loves you, the man who is still there wishing you didn't have to go through this.
2006-09-05 11:13:34 · answer #5 · answered by Otis F 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry for your confusion. It's a bad thing to do to play with kids emotions that way. What I hope you do is let the guy you thought all along was your dad, be your dad if you love and appreciate him. We all need dads very, very, very much and I hope you let him be your dad until some better candidate comes along.
2006-09-05 11:30:13 · answer #6 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey, this happens all the time. I don't know how old you are. but since you have grown up with this man treating you as his
biological daughter, raising you, taking care of your needs, I'm pretty sure that to him, you are his real daughter. And you have always known him to be your dad, so why should things change. He is your dad in all senses of being. Cherish him for being there for you. and try to get on with your lives.
2006-09-05 11:23:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your Dad left you and your stepdad is real good to you, just think the lord that your Mother found a wonderful Dad for you. I think should just answer them with My dad is a good man.
2006-09-05 11:15:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh...well...I'm really sorry. Well I have a father and I know he's not my real father and I love my father now but I want to at least know real father's name was or maybe even know what he looked like. The worst part is he died before I was even born and I know my mom will never ever tell me anything about him. I guess we both have problems with our fathers...
2006-09-06 10:46:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was very cruel not to tell you the truth sooner. Your "real" dad is the one who raised you and took care of you. The other one was just a sperm donor.
2006-09-05 11:12:47 · answer #10 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋