My husband only gives me 250 dollars a week for fifteen years, why dont I get a cost of living raise?

Question

I am a stay at home Mom, take care of my Dad, he manages the money. He's never given me extra to buy the kids any bedroom furniture or chest of drawers to keep their clothes in, but he collects guns, hunts, stuffs trophy kills and thinks giving me a car to drive is like a gift, rather than a requirement. The money I get is for groceries, gasoline, doctor, prescriptions, vet, grooming. Why does he think that is all I deserve and that he is giving so much. We cost him by water food and electricity and roof over our head. Non maintained roof at that. Is he wrong or am I selfish or something?

for the record, daddy has his own money, hunting is very expensive, and men are suppose to provide enough for food, clothes and definitely furniture, prom dresses shoes etc for kids. He resents us and always has. Tending to my parents made it hard for me to work outside and be there for my kids while they were growing up. I did everything but work, so I couldn't afford to leave him. I am too busy. cut him off years ago. Must show he loves me first.

Answer 1

Go hunting with him and have an ACCIDENT. Then you'll get some money!

Answer 2

If you are married, all of his money is your money too. You need to take some power in this relationship--sit down with your husband and create a new budget together. You need to budget for bills (including all utilities, car payments, any outstanding doctor's bills, etc), groceries/prescriptions, gas for both vehicles, child and pet expenses, incidentals (minor house repairs, occasional eating out or the like), and emergency money. Then anything left over should be divided in two for each of you to have a discretionary fund (his hunting, and whatever you would like money for). You need to know how much money there is, where it is, and what it is being used for. It sounds like you would both benefit greatly from marriage counseling.

Answer 3

Personally I don't think $1,000/mo. is too shabby, but that is only my opinion. Maybe you can get a small part-time job on the weekends (2, 4-hr shifts) and earn yourself some extra money. Maybe he'll offer more per mo. to keep you home if he doesn't like you being gone to make more money. I understand though there is difficulty with having to care for your father. If you have other siblings who are living, you should ask if anyone would be willing to contribute to his living expenses.

Another option is try and get as many bargains as you can to stretch your dollars if your husband is really not willing to increase to amount. If you have a Grocery Outlet in your town - you will save some serious cash on groceries - also a Big Lots will help you stretch out that money too.

Answer 4

With a masters degree you should already know the answer to this question but I'll play along. As long as you keep your expenses down and make good choices, anything is possible. Make looking for a job your 2nd job. Consider applying to temp agencies for further supplementation to your income and call back to each daily for possible daily odd jobs. Don't forget to check job listings in the newspaper, online and at the local WorkOne office. The college you graduated from should also assist you to find a good paying job (sorry, I forget the term most use). Just a few ideas...just don't give up.

Answer 5

If you really see that this is a problem. Talk to your husband about staying home with the kids while you go out and work and bring home the paycheck. Maybe he will understand if you trying talking to him about your situation.

Answer 6

start using the money exactly what its for only dont try to stretch it any longer to make it last...when he sees that the things he's used to are no longer around or are substandard maybe he'll sit up and take notice...then go out and get a job so you no longer have to depend on him for these things....you're heading straight down a path of resentment that could possibly lead to the demise of your marriage...although there never seemed to be a problem before...your addressing it now says there is

Answer 7

You need to talk to him. This kind of arrangement should have been made clear before you married him.

Answer 8

NO HE IS WRONG U ARE HIS EQUAL NOT HIS SERVANT. U SHOULDN'T HAVE TO ASK HIM FOR MONEY THAT IS DEGRADING. YES HE MAY MAKE THE MONEY BUT U ARE MARRIED AND THAT MEANS WHAT IS HIS IS YOURS AS WELL AS WHAT IS YOURS IS HIS. I DON'T THINK U SHOULD HAVE THE MONEY TO SPEND FOOLISHLY BUT WHEN IT COMES TO BUYING THINGS FOR THE KIDS THINGS THEY NEED U SHOULD HAVE TO ASK AND GET PERMISSION.

Answer 9

my wife gives me $200.oo a week and I work my a.s.s. just the same as she does! well thats because I want her to hold the money :p

Answer 10

my husband and i used to have this same issue. start not buying/doing the things that he benefits from. stop buying his favorite foods, stop doing his laundry. tell him that you aren't being compensated properly and you need more money. withhold sex if you have to.