It was my girlfriend's 24th birthday and one of her good friends got her some kind of low cut or low riding jeans, whatever you call them. I told her friend that I didn't allow her to wear that kind of clothing but that I and my girlfriend appreciated her thoughtfulness. I asked her if she didn't mind if my girlfriend took it back to get something else. Well, then she got all upset at me and said I was controlling, blah, blah, blah. Whatever....anyways, should I have just let my girlfriend take the gift and then have her return it later without saying anything? Or perhaps, let her take the jeans and then have her throw them out after her friend left? I just felt it would be a good idea to let her know that this was inappropriate attire for her and thought it would be good to let her know up front in case she ever asked why my girlfriend never wore those jeans. I hate that her gift made my girlfriend so uncomfortable because she knew me AND her dad would never let her wear that.
2006-09-05 09:03:46 · 39 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Thanks for the 2 points. You controlling freak!
2006-09-05 09:07:08 · answer #1 · answered by esgrimistanaval73 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you were wrong. And if you can't see that then there's something wrong with you. Your girl friend is a human being with her own mind. It's totally her choice to wear or keep the jeans. You had no right to say anything, it was not your gift. You hate the gift because it made your girl uncomfortable - how about you made her feel uncomfortable my making a happy occasion a miserable one. If you treated me that way and my father knew he'd having a talk with me about what I was doing with you. Unbelievable.
2006-09-05 09:36:38 · answer #2 · answered by b's wife 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If your girl Friend really feels the way you do about the jeans,... the I think your girl Friend should have said something. Not you. Girls have a communication, very different.... believe me. When my girl Friend tells me something,... I listen more, because I know she is being honest and I know she is not saying anything to hurt me. Sometimes, the way my husband says things to me,... I get my feelings hurt. I know he is not trying to be mean but men's tones always sound harsh than when women say certain things. Does that make sense? I don't think you are controlling, but to someone who does not know you like your girlfriend does, it may have come off that way. Her Friend was giving her a gift and just got her feelings hurt.
2006-09-05 09:15:52 · answer #3 · answered by Photographer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it's a good thing you did let her friend know this,cause now her friend knows that you are controlling you're g/f..and shouldn't be.She is her own person and should choose what clothes to wear and make her own decisions in life.It was not you're place to tell her friend she cant wear these clothes.If she didn't like the shorts she should been the one to say so not you..I'm 40yrs. old and been married for 17yrs. and can comfortably say that NO man will ever tell me what to wear or what to do as far as that goes.You and you're g/f will not last if you try to tell her how to dress I'm sure you control allot of other things she does.The year is 2006 not 1906 get a life
2006-09-05 09:15:05 · answer #4 · answered by mygrandparentsrthebestintheworld 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
She should have thrown you out. You are not her dad and you are not God. She is a 24 year old woman and has the right to make her own decisions. She could have kep the jeans and worn them comfortably without you having to worry about other guys seeing your precious properties skin. A lot of the shirt styles are longer and cover rmore.
Stop being so controlling.
2006-09-05 09:16:08 · answer #5 · answered by crazydenae 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get over yourself!! Your girlfriend is 24. 24. NOT a child. She doesn't need your or her father telling her what to wear!!
If she goes someplace dressed inappropriately (like if she wears low riders to a job interview), she'll have to deal with the outcome. But SHE needs to make that decision herself.
If you still have a girlfriend after this, get down on your knees and thank God she didn't dump your controlling ***!! If you were my boyfriend, you wouldn't have even finished your sentence before you were out the door.
2006-09-05 09:12:13 · answer #6 · answered by BasketChick 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow. If your girlfriend is willing to put up with your complete bull$hit attitude, then I guess go for it.
I would never let another person (my husband, my father, whomever!!!) make the decisions about what I will wear. This is MY choice, and not anyone else's.
If you had tried that with me, I would have stripped naked, put the pants on, then kicked your a$$ straight out the door, right there on the spot!
FYI, the gift didn't make your girlfriend uncomfortable - your reaction to it did.
2006-09-05 09:11:26 · answer #7 · answered by abfabmom1 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's very controlling, and her dad is in on this too? What is she some possession or fashion doll for you to dress up? You know if you just let her accept the jeans she could've worn a longer shirt over it. But even if she didn't- SHE'S YOUR GIRLFRIEND NOT YOUR SLAVE, NOR POSSESSION, NOR UNDERAGED DAUGHTER!!! You were totally wrong in these actions and it was probably your controlling factor that made her uncomfortable, not a friend who was just try to treat her to something nice!!!
EDIT: This man disgusts me. I went through his other questions that he had asked. Check the titles of these out:
"Am I out of line for having my girlfriend address me as "sir" or "master"? (nonsexual)?
Should I permit my girlfriend to go to the beach without me?
What should I do about my girlfriend's friend who is telling her to break it off with me b/c I am controlling?
Was I wrong to restrict my girlfriend's tv programming?
Was I wrong for smacking my girlfriend's hand?
Should I let my girlfriend eat burgers and fries? (need objective advice)?
What is a good bedtime for a wife or girlfriend? I told mine 10 p.m. lights out and she thinks its not fair.?
Isn't the man supposed to be head of the household??
What are some logical punishments I can give my girlfriend when she does something wrong?
Does a wife ever have a right to not obey her husband?"
There are many more, this man is a psycho sexist and these questions would be proof enough to get him on charges of domestic abuse. I'm serious. He allienates her from her friends, makes her call him master, Gives her an allowance and implements punishments? I wish I knew this guys real name and place of living so I could report him to the authorities. (btw, alienation and seclusion are forms of domestic abuse) Unless this is just one big sick joke that someone came up with to see how'd people react, and in that case he is a psychotic sadist with a sick obsession with human psyche.
2006-09-05 09:10:01 · answer #8 · answered by sondra j 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
WTF? She's 24, she can wear whatever she wants! Low rise jeans are not whorish, or whatever excuse you have. It's not like she's planning to wear a thing with them, and even if she is, it's her choice.
Her dad? Her Dad, wouldn't let her wear them. let me state this again, she's 24. She's not a 16 year old, scneaking out her bedroom window. She's probably out of college and off his insurance, so it doesn't matter what he thinks, or what you think he thinks, either. Her Dad would probably be mad at you for controlling her. And if she has a brother, he'd be mad too.
2006-09-05 11:58:30 · answer #9 · answered by millancad 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
IF your girlfriend agrees with you and her father about what she should and should not be wearing (this is a big if... have you talked about it??) SHE should have been the one to say something to her friend.
For you to say to your g/f's friend "i don't ALLOW her to do that" comes off as very controlling. Relationships are not about what you allow or do not allow the other person to do. They are about watching out for each other's best interests, respect, and compromise. It is one thing to say "I worry that people will not show enough respect for you when you wear revealing clothing." It is quite another to say "I won't allow you to wear that."
2006-09-05 09:17:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Who the heck are you to tell her what she can or cannot wear?. Knock it off, only a young childish insecure person would disagree with a dam Jean. I could see if it were a G-string to wear outside to a picnic. Anyhow, it was def NOT YOUR place to tell HER friend a thing. You should have let her decide that for herself. Woman don't like men to control them,and for the record you are NOT on the same level as her father. Reevaluate your position "boyfriend"!
2006-09-05 09:10:07 · answer #11 · answered by peacfulwar 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋