How do you honestly respond to liers and cheaters?

Question

I know that most people talk a pretty big talk...........but how do you really deal in your own relationships with liers and cheaters that you have been dating for a really long time? I really need these examples to help me through something really rough........ I thank you for your honest responses........... Blessed be.......

Answer 1

IT HURTS BUT I THINK THAT IF THEY CARED ABOUT ME AS MUCH AS I CARE ABOUT THEM DISHONESTY WOULD NOT BE IN THE PICTURE. I SIMPLY WALK AWAY. CLEAR THE AIR AND THEN JUST PUT THAT PERSON BEHIND ME. THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO VALID REASON FOR AN ADULT PERSON TO LIE OR CHEAT.

Answer 2

When someone shows you their character you must believe it because the only thing worse than having fooled yourself as long as you have is trying to fool yourself even longer. Here is some stuff that might help.

The first thing to do in a situation like this is realize there is a pattern to the healing process, first there is a lot of anger, second there may be a period when you have sex with your partner a lot in order to 'stake your claim' or win your partner back, then the real affects of what has happened set in and thats when you know whether it is something you can deal with or not. I didn't realize this and made mistakes and big decisions while still going through this process and they turned out to be the wrong decisions. I feel that if I had known about this pattern I could have seen things more clearly.

As far as continuing the relationship or not you first need to determine whether or not getting over it is something you should do. I saw 7 things that can help you determine this:

Is it an isolated incident or a pattern of behavior? (including past relationships, even if its the first time he cheated on you has he cheated on other gf's)

Does he own it (take full blame) or does he make excuses for why it happened?

Does he REALLY grasp the damage he's done to you and your relationship or does he just pay it lip service?

Is he sorry for the choice he made or sorry that he got caught?

Is he willing to do what it takes to clean up the mess he made, whatever it takes and however long it takes? or does he want to deny it and move on?

Is it out of character for him or is he insenstive about other things too? (respects your feelings, treats you with dignity, etc)

Is it a legacy or a new behavior? did he grow up in a family where this happened? if its what he learned thats a big clue.

Once you've gone through these and IF you determine that the answers all favor a successful relationship then you take it one day a at a time, if its a history or a pattern you leave and realize that it is the idea of the relationship that you 'love' and not the reality, surely you don't define being loved as someone that devestates you emotionally and doesn't care that he did. you have a lot of thinking to do, but don't worry it WILL get better and you will be ok! Good luck, I hope this helps.

Answer 3

I deal with them honestly. If I know they are lying, I don't freak out. I look them straight in the eye and ask them, "Why do you feel as though you have to lie to me, don't you think that I know the truth?" (This gives them the feeling that they've been found out. I use it even when I don't know anything). Then the next question is, "Why, did you do it?" (This is asking them to explain their actions) and you wouldn't believe what comes out.
I have no time for cheaters, liars are a different story. I like putting them on the spot. But, there's a type of liar that no one should put up with and that's a "lying cheater". People lie for many different reasons. Cheaters are just cheaters and they always hurt the one they cheat. Whether it be in cards or a relationship. If you are a person that can put up with cheating, more power to you. You truly are a weak person. And in with that, you are cheating yourself.

Answer 4

If you are dating someone who is cheating and lying to you and you know about it but they think you don't.

How else can you respond to the abuse then to get away from that relationship and be respected and know you are Worth more than that.

An example would be to stand up for what you feel is right and let that person know that the lies and cheating is not out in the open and see the reaction and walk away. No explanation needed, it will also be a lie!

Answer 5

If a my man cheats on me, I tell him to not let the door hit him on the *** on the way out. Sweety, once a cheater, always a cheater and I will never take them back. And for the lier part, if you catch them in a lie and they still denie that it was a lie.....dump their ***. If they lie about stupid little things that you catch them in, just imagin all the big things they may be lying about and you just haven't figured them out or caught them in it.

Hope that helps....Good luck!!

Answer 6

Keep being honest. Ask the significant other real questions that pertain to your insecurities. Based on the answer you're given, question that some more. You can basically feel someone out if they're lying to you. See what kind of answer you get, but don't accuse anyone...it's always best to ask and give them a chance to tell the truth (benefit of a doubt). They'll eventually tie their own knot and hang themself!!! (Get caught in a lie)

Answer 7

Granted, facing a situation such as this one in a long term relationship is one of the hardest things to face, but it must be done. Self respect is the key thing here. Short term or long, confront the situation head on, be strong, and keep your self respect. Good luck, hang in there.

Answer 8

First, resolve to believe that this about them, not you.

Second, remember that they are liars and cheaters. This a a reflection on THEM. If you continue to resent the lies and cheating, you will only be harming yourself. Let go of it, and move on.

Forgive them. Far easier said than done, but you will bear the resentment until you do.

Answer 9

the slient treatment. then he will get nervous and wants to talk with you. then the first word out of your mouth is "Let break up" then he will be begging for a second chances. If not, then you can end the relationship with the cheater anyway.

Answer 10

you forgive them and move on you honestly don't ddeserve to be repeatedly lied to and cheated on your worth more than your wait in gold and your man/guyt shoulf know this and behave responsibly i suggest you start tieing things up and looking for the right one who won't care about telling you the truth because he knows that's what you want and he's fine with being himself that's the kind of guy most girts need and deserve someone truthful and open not decieving and cheating i mean your good enough to wait for right?

Answer 11

definite, He rewarded Him this way : The deceiver have been given deceived . Jacob paid for that by thinking he became getting Rachel , purely to awaken and discover it became Leah , working 14 years for Rachel, having the hatred of his brother Esau . And all the junk that Lebon did . God is definitely no longer mocked, by any ability a guy sows, that still shall he get carry of. yet God is merciful and forgives .