After reading another question, it made me think of how many women I am related to or good friends with disconnect themselves form everthing they were before the relationship they're in. With that said I am left to believe that their man is the reason behind this. I have experienced these type of woman stay in the house, not even call, not to mention how they don't socialize anymore (I believe it's because they feel inferior to other women in the presence of their man, speaking from experience)! I just think it's outrageous to wrap yourself up so much in a person that if they leave you have shunned everyone so much that no one wants to be bothered because they know it's just a matter of time before they get another man and fall into the same routine! I have generously cut back on anything that discredits my relationship however, I am still full of life and personality, am out going and definately not so insecure that my man can't go out with me nor can women come over when he's home!
2006-09-05 04:15:15 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
oops take out the with before the word disconnect and change the form and add from
2006-09-05 04:19:09 · update #1
Let me edit that last sentence I am not insecure so I don't mind if women (friends or family of mine) come over around him or we go out together with him. Trust me, doing this because the relationship is new has nothing to do with things
2006-09-05 04:24:25 · update #2
aaaannnntttt, wrong answer it's not about growing up! I am in a relationship of 3 years but unlike my best friend, sister and cousin I don't put "HIM" first, I put us first and then consider him, they don't come to family reunions, cookouts, not even out to dinner on girls night out (clubbing we don't do), not even attend my daughter's First Birthday party, now tell me how that would jeapordize a relationship all of the three have been in their relationship for 3 years, 11 years, and eight now what's the excuse they don't even call! I myself though am laid back and enjoy the same things as they do!
2006-09-05 04:37:40 · update #3
I agree with you, it's because they are insecure, it's what they think will keep a relationship going. These type of women remain in this insecure cycle and they don't even know it. If they get out of one relationship, they get into another that is similar.
Don't blame it on their man... they are doing exactly what they believe is expected of them.
2006-09-05 04:26:20 · answer #1 · answered by J j 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Although I think men often influence this change, the man isn't always responsible. I know lots of women who feel obligated, with or without pressure from their man, to devote the majority of their time and energy to the relationship. The only time they'll ever get involved in any other kind of social situation is if there is NO possible way they can dedicate that time to the relationship. A lot of women I know worry about making their man jealous, and out of what they feel is respect, they decline other social interactions (especially if other men will be present).
2006-09-05 04:18:57 · answer #2 · answered by JudasHero 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like the men you are talking about are abusers. They control the woman by degrading and threatening them and keeping them from their support systems. Once isolated, the woman has no resources of her own, and is trapped. Usually these women have low self esteem to begin with, and only feel like they are important if they "have a man."
Society has done a poor job empowering women even after the women's lib push in the 70's and 80's. There is still a large contingency of women who feel like they need to have a man, and part of this is that they are having sex younger, and giving birth younger, and are saddled with a child, and have no marketable skills making a man necessary.
And, so they story goes.
2006-09-05 04:25:19 · answer #3 · answered by kids and cats 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you're in love you become wrapped up in the other person. all of a sudden sitting at home in front of the television with your love is ten times more exciting than going on a shopping spree with all of your friends. You end up sharing a bond with that person that no friend or family member could ever understand/compete with.
That's not to say you should cut other people out of your life, it just happenes slowly. It doesn't mean you don't care about those people.
With me, I had my friends but we were never that close. It was no one's fault but they were my friends since high school and I just didnt fit in with them anymore. So when my relationship developed with my bf, I felt like I found someone who wanted to listen to what I had to say, etc. He was my best friend.
Now that we broke up, I still don't want to hang out with my friends; so it's really just a combination of factors.
2006-09-05 04:25:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
To many women joining to a man means throwing themselves into their relationship and fitting around the life of their mate. This often plays out as leaving their former lives behind.
Its not right, but this is something many do without ever knowing why.
2006-09-05 04:20:30 · answer #5 · answered by Jeff W 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can see your point of view and also know that when I became in volved it was like this. I usued to be single for so long I did single things and had single friends. I had tried to incorporate my single friends in my new found relationship but they wanted to club. I didn't feel comfortable and wasn't in the hunt game. Because of that I was left out. So I see how that can happen.
2006-09-05 04:18:47 · answer #6 · answered by Karrien Sim Peters 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I asked this question... of myself. Once I started to date my bf, he never told me I couldn't see my friends and family, but I started to "disconnect" myself from them because I realized (on my own) that they weren't as supportive as I thought they were. I have dreams and goals that no one understands but my man, and no one is more willing to accept these things as he is. They judge and are quick to "nag", but he on the other hand gives my dreams serious thought and wants to see them come true just as much as I do. If my friends and family could be like that, maybe I'd be around them more. But my situation has nothing to do with your theory about feeling inferior. My situation has more to do with choosing to feel respected and revered over feeling nagged and judge by so-called friends, and people I am related to by no choice of my own.
2006-09-05 04:23:16 · answer #7 · answered by Leggz 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you have it all wrong its respect. you have to respect the relationship and not put yourself first. I think women do this better because they are not as selfish as men, i think women know to let there past family/friends know that i love him and want to be with him and they surround them self with others that respect the fact that she has a man.
2006-09-05 04:25:05 · answer #8 · answered by bigmj75 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Has it ever crossed your mind that these women are happy to stay in with their man. It's called growing up.
2006-09-05 04:27:31 · answer #9 · answered by sarah k 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I would say they are devoting all their time to see if a relationship could work rather then socialize.
2006-09-05 04:19:35 · answer #10 · answered by omvg1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋