I met this guy Jason at a party two years ago. We kissed before I went
home that night. Anyway, I only got to see him once after that before he
rejoined the army and I had to go back to college. We kept in touch and
actually I'm not talking to him at the moment. Why? Well
Almost a year after we met he told me he was interested in other girls.
(One of whom is a good friend of mine Jenn Hoy and this other girl named
Claire.) I told him I couldn't compete with friends for that. Jenn Hoy
finds another boyfriend so she's happy now. Jason and I decide to be
friends. Anyway, he tells me that he got stationed in Ft. Lewis. I thought
that was cool because I go to college in Washington state. Anyway I see him
when he gets there and we end up making out. But he still says friends.
Anyway we keep in touch after that. Then I find out some friends of ours
got stationed in Ft. Lewis too. ( Aaron and his wife Amber.) So the four
of us hang out. He makes out with me again and still says just friends.
Time goes on. I get added to Jason's Yahoo 360 page.
I'm bored and I'm looking at who Jason has on his buddy list and I come
across Claire. I click to go to her page and I read some of her blogs.
Jason is the only guy she writes about. It says they're in a relationship
and she went to see him this past July. After they spend the week together
Jason says we're friends with benefits and that he and Claire are in an
open relationship.
( Meaning they can see other people.) I ask Claire if it's the truth
because of what he said to me. Claire doesn't email me back. Instead I get
a phone call from Jason saying he's upset about what I asked. He said it
seemed like I was trying to break them up and that luckily he and Claire
are very honest with each other and he would never cheat on Claire.
However I know he's been online dating her and he had a girlfriend in
Seattle at the same time at one point. This is on top of making out with
me mind you. I haven't really talked to him since. My question is should
I completely rat Jason out to Claire so she knows what he's been doing if
she doesn't know already. Or should I just let her figure this out
herself? Im asking because she deserves to know the truth and if he is
doing this behind her back she deserves someone better.
2006-09-05 03:03:12 · 12 answers · asked by Paige 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Trust me if there's one thing I know is that women are sneakier than men. With that said, I know she has to know he's not doing right by her and she chooses to accept this. Trust me if you want to maintain any type of relationship with her just forget about it all. Trust me when a women is in love no one can tell her a damn thing in there best interest without the woman thinking your try to sabotage her relationship and happiness. Lastly, if she's a true friend she'll talk to you about it otherwise I wouldn't count on a hi and bye exchange between the two of you since this little incident (that's why He called you instead of her)!
2006-09-05 03:21:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a rat! "A friend with benefits"... he must have known that you wanted more... sorry hun but you've been had. He's used you just like he's probably using Claire and like he'll use other people in the future.
I can't tell you what you should or shouldn't do but I can tell you what I once did.
I was seeing a guy who had a young child and what he described as "an interfering ex". He described the mother of his child as someone who was emotionally unstable, making manipulative self-harm attempts etc and that was the reason why he did not yet want to be open about our relationship or for me to meet his parents. For months I thought nothing of it. I became annoyed with it eventually and one day, after a year or so... I paid her a visit (in a moment of madness)...
She was a really nice girl, not manipulative nor unstable. They had never split up!!! She had an incling he was seeing someone on the side. We outed him and he almost had a coronary when he realised we were sitting down and comparing notes.
She took him back after all that... I thought she deserved better.
I never spoke to him again. I think you should get over him, as you deserve better. Claire probably deserves better too, but whether she'll have the confidence to leave him and find someone better, who knows. She probably initially won't thank you for telling on him. Maybe she'll be in so much denial that she'll make herself believe that you are jealous and want to break them up?
Its a choice only you can make. Good luck.
2006-09-05 10:18:56 · answer #2 · answered by Placebo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you tell her you would come out looking like the bad guy. She obviously knows that he was messing with you, and it is possible that she knows about the other girl, too. Remove yourself from the situation and find someone new. College is full of dorky-hot smart guys and sexy football players! Go shopping for a new man!
2006-09-05 10:14:42 · answer #3 · answered by CrazyJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why? Is Claire your best friend or sister? Or is it really you just want to stick your nose in where it doesn't belong. Give it a rest, get back into the real world as opposed to that soap opera high school childish crap you've been living.
2006-09-05 10:08:08 · answer #4 · answered by Zelda 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, tell Claire.
2006-09-05 10:07:12 · answer #5 · answered by JillA 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If all you have done in two years is kiss, it ain't worth all this drama.
2006-09-05 10:13:37 · answer #6 · answered by buldawg 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sure you girls talk in the bathrooms about things like this all the time, so just go ahead and do it, subtly
2006-09-05 10:05:48 · answer #7 · answered by rand a 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If she dint Know She Knows now.
2006-09-05 10:13:02 · answer #8 · answered by Pat 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well u already emailed her so she knows.
get away from him he is only using u. friends with benifits is bs.
2006-09-05 10:09:46 · answer #9 · answered by Lady Geo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the truth wii set you free.
2006-09-05 10:10:56 · answer #10 · answered by justmejimw 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋