i have a mortgage with my Ex boyfriend. he has decided not to pay his share of the mortgage so my parents are paying his share. i still live at the flat. we are hoping to buy him out. he is very bitter about the break up and wants to come to our flat with all his mates for a drunken weekend despite me not agreeing to this. ive told him that im not happy with this and that he can come up on his own when things have settled as he does get violent and nasty if drunk. i dont really want him to come up at all but whilst hes still on the mortgage, even though hes not paying, i cant really refuse. he will not listen to me so im arranging to change the locks as i fear for what he might do. am i doing the right thing?
2006-09-05 00:10:28 · 31 answers · asked by XCuteX 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Get a restraining order and refinance it and get your parents as co-signers on the loan. You do NOT have to have him over just cuz he's on the mortgage! That's RIDICULOUS!! You can even take it to court and SUE him for the money he hasn't payed.
Good luck.
2006-09-05 00:13:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
For a start change the locks as you said. The weekend he is meant to come with his friends GET OUT of the flat, stay away, just in case he boots the door in, make sure you leave a window just open that he is not likely to notice whilst outside or inside the flat, so that you can get back in if he decides to change locks too, you can always get a lock smith in if ya don't have the choice with the window BUT it will cost...in the meantime seek legal advice and get a restraining order on him, then if he turns up trying to get in the flat call the police and they will arrest him on the spot and detain him till next day. He will soon get the message
2006-09-05 00:49:26 · answer #2 · answered by Denise W 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yup!
Change the locks, and keep reciepts of payments made by yourself and your folks!!
Make sure you put some Beefy locks on, and that you have some friends over that night!!
The deal is simple. If he is due to pay and stops, and you keep records supporting this fact, any solicitor can get you out of any legal trouble he might put you through!
I think the easiest way out would be to sell the property and split any profit made (Minus any payments he missed.) and then to try and get a smaller place on your own with your share!
Of course you income will be lower alone, and therefore you won't be able to borrow as much, but you should have a good history, and I'm sure the same mortgage people would offer you a good deal.
Let me know what you think or if you have any direct questions for me. brightonguy101@hotmail.com
Mikey B
2006-09-05 00:16:51 · answer #3 · answered by Mikey B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are. He may have paid the mortgage but it doesn't give him the right to terrorise you. I would change the locks and hope he takes that as a sign that he is not welcome. He just wants to get at you and try and make you feel some of the hurt he is feeling. Contact a solicitor and your lender as soon as you can to resolve this. The problem is if he is behaving like a **** bag it's going to be hardwork. If he has stopped paying the mortgage the longer you pay it on your own the more of the property will belong to you.
2006-09-05 00:16:13 · answer #4 · answered by Barry Von Leotard III 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If your in fear of him then you need to get a restraining order, I don't think he has any rights to be there if he isnt paying his share of the mortgage.. Maybe you can talk to a lawyer about buying him out since you two arent together anymore and he isnt keeping up his share.. Good luck
2006-09-05 00:20:03 · answer #5 · answered by Tracy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know what country you're from but in the states its illegal to evict someone or change the locks on a person that's on the lease with you, unless your life is endangered. If he refuses to pay rent you should consult with a lawyer and see what your legal options are. I wouldn't do anything drastic as changing the locks cause that will only piss him off and things could probably get messy.
2006-09-05 00:14:24 · answer #6 · answered by sexy_n_chicago 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Change the locks. Call your local citizens advice for help - especially since he isnt paying his half of the mortgage. I'm pretty sure that reduces his rights to the property and he is not entitled to have access. But check with them.
2006-09-05 00:18:01 · answer #7 · answered by Leiani 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to change the locks for sure but you also need to take out a protection order to keep yourself safe... If you get one of these orders he can not come on to the property... Even if he has some claim to the home he can not harass you and make you feel unsafe, remember you are residing there and while the order is in place he can not come there... If he does you call the police...
2006-09-05 00:16:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
your doing the right thing.. however may i suggest when the locks are changed you stay away from the house on the night he's supposed to come over. if he tends to get violent when drunk you don't want to be there. if he gets in he gets in but theres no point risking getting hurt yourself. also contact a solicitor and mention to the local police who will maybe speak to him before he does something stupid. good luck.
2006-09-05 00:26:06 · answer #9 · answered by raymond m 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ABSOLUTELY he has no right to just invite himself and his mates in there. When he arrives and discovers he cant get into your flat - if he turns nasty call the police and get them to sort him. You also need to see a solicitor about getting is name off the mortgage certificate.
2006-09-05 00:14:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋