I have a daughter with a girl other than my wife. I pay child support for my daughter even though i have never seen her. The Mother will not let me see her, but yet i am paying child support. I have spent thousands of dollars on attorney's trying to get visitation rights but the mother does not comply with the agreements. She makes no effort to let me see her at all. So i am to the point that i feel like I am paying child support for a daughter that i have never seen. How can i get out of paying this support
2006-09-04 21:03:15 · 19 answers · asked by Tim F 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Murder.
2006-09-04 21:08:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
I'm not sure where you live but in some states, child support and visitation rights are two different orders. Are you on the birth certificate? If so, check into the "No kidnap law" and see if there is one in your state. If so, she can not stop you from coming to see your daughter unless she has a judgment stating that you are not allowed to see the little girl.
Provided that you have a judgment with visitation rights, and she is not complying. Take the police to your daughter's school or to her home. The mother can not stop you from seeing your daughter if the law and a judge says you can see her.
2006-09-05 04:12:45 · answer #2 · answered by Lynda C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello!! :o) Assuming - of course - that you ARE an OK guy [and not an abuser of any description] I can't help but think that you DO have a leg to stand on. You and that 'girl other than your wife' signed a legal contract. And like any legal contract - BOTH parties are bound to abide by what was agreed to. Your lawyer is failing to do his/her job by not bringing this matter up before a judge. It would be like me paying you for a car - and YOU not giving me the car!! The agreement between that 'other girl' and yourself is that YOU agreed to pay child support and SHE agreed to visitation rights. Talk to your lawyer. Or better yet - find a new lawyer. But like others have said - do your best NOT to make it seem that you regret supporting your DAUGHTER. You simply want the mother of that girl to live up to her part of the bargain. AND if worse comes to worse - insist on proof that she really is your daughter. [But never talk to your daughter about any of this - if and when you DO see her] Good luck. Craig!! :o)
2006-09-05 04:58:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure it's your child? You've had the test done?
Visitation through the Courts, is a Court Order.
To not do so is to risk fines, and or Jail time. The
Mother doesn't get to "not comply".
So something is wrong with your story.
Let's see, a child out of "Wedlock" and you're
paying the price. Sounds like on purpose.
In my State, you do what the Court Judge tells you to do.
Here, Judges have taken children from the
Mother, and given them to the Father.
Make certain she's your child. Find out why the Court
Order for Visitation isn't being carried out.
If she's your child, have proof that you fought to see her.
One day she may want to know why she never had you
in her life.
2006-09-05 04:48:31 · answer #4 · answered by elliebear 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can sign up rights on her. Which means you don't pay anymore child support and you have no rights to her at all. But if you have court documents stating that you have visitation rights and shes not complying she can get into trouble for that, call your local child service office and talk to them about it. If you live in Minnesota good luck cuz when your a man here you get screwed, Seen it way to many times
2006-09-05 04:10:04 · answer #5 · answered by sarahkay1 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just try to remember that the child support is going to the child, not the mother. I think that's why it aggravates guys from paying. They usually hate the mother. I paid child support and my ex made way more money than I did. Plus, my children were paying him from their jobs. I just paid and kept thinking it was for the good of my children. My kids know I love them and that's all that matters to me. When your daughter is 18 she can find you and start a relationship with you and she'll know you did the right thing.
2006-09-05 08:27:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Try for joint custody, if that fails, you'll have to keep paying child support. Remember, it's for your daughter... once she turns 18 (or 21, depending on where you live) she'll legally be an adult and free to do what she wishes. If you really want to see your daughter, you will be willing to wait for that length of time.
2006-09-05 04:22:58 · answer #7 · answered by Astrid 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all if she is not doing what the court ordered you need to let them know at your next family hearing she has to do what they ordered or she can get locked up. Or if you want you can just drop your parental rights to the child and you will not have to pay. She won't let you see the baby anyway.
2006-09-05 04:11:54 · answer #8 · answered by PRE-PRE 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My hubby and I have been in exactly the same situation and we continued to pay CS because it was the right thing to do. It's not the child's fault that the mom is so mean so don't punish the child by withholding support. One day your daughter will figure out what her mom has been doing and want to get to know you. My hubby's daughters did after 12 years of estrangement.
2006-09-05 04:12:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Pay the child support. Unless there is a reason she is keeping your daughter from you (such as drugs and alcohol) then consult an attorney for visitation rights.
2006-09-05 04:07:37 · answer #10 · answered by tw0cl0n3m3 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Ask a lawyer, maybe if you don't pay they will take you to court and re-asses the visitation rights at the same time. But check first.
2006-09-05 05:31:34 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋