He COULD be married..why does he behave this way??

Question

I work with this guy at a sports bar who barely speaks any English, and I speak Spanish roughly so we do communicate. We are around the same age and he is always so sweet and helpful and gentlemanlike. He always gives me direct eye contact and even when we are not talking he will just stare straight into my eyes, he also looks back at me when I walk away from a conversation and he turns his head. He touches my back and shoulders a lot and pinches my sides and is always joking around and trying to make me laugh and says "muy bonita" My friends have even noticed and tell me he looks at me a lot when I don't notice. He is one of the most genuinely kind people I have ever met and our connection is insane. When I look into his eyes I just feel "it". You know?? Chemistry?? the "sparks" and connection and everything. The only problem besides him only speaking Spanish is that I heard he could be married. This is from an unreliable source and he doesn't wear a ring which means nothing, I know

by the way he acts, but I'm going to treat him as he is. I am a Christian gal so it would be against my morals and beliefs to cheat with a married man, so I would never DO it or consider it. Also, I am saving myself until marriage, so no I'm not interested in a sexual relationship with this guy. I just genuinely care about him..but I know that nothing can happen. Why does he do these things??! Thanks for any help/advice and God bless!!

Also..am I horrible for feeling attracted to him??

Answer 1

You can feel attracted to someone. There's no shame in that. You don't know for a fact that he is married. You could just ask him if you want to know.

Language isn't a definate barrier to marriage either. My brother and his wife have different native languages and they learned enough of the other's to communicate very well. You learn to accomodate and adjust for love.

Answer 2

Hear, hear! I'm not Christian myself, but I have known enough Christians to know that this is not typical of the majority. Same with the mean Atheists. Both extreme sides of the fence tend to be jerks on Y!A. I think it's because the more friendly and Christlike Christians just don't yell as much. Christians and Atheists: if you want to represent your groups as good, intelligent and kind, think of that before you type. I can't imagine any groups as dismayed as moderate Christians and Atheists by the behavior of a mean little few. And ich, do you have any idea what schizophrenia actually is? Because I assure you, nothing in the Diagnostic Manual looks anything like what he said. Although, based on what he said, I'd say that's a compliment to schizophrenic people.

Answer 3

Maybe his charm and flirtatious manners attracts you. Maybe you check to see if has a ring on his finger, if he does maybe he
is married.
If he is married his wife might be in other country.
Maybe you could ask if he is married if you have any serious doubts. Don't try and avoid him because then he think something is wrong. Just tell him you true feels and see where it goes.
I hope this help. take care and good luck in finding out.

Answer 4

Run...faster...Don't fall into temptation. he is not Sweet and kind, he is pursuing you. A man that is married and is nice and kind to another woman other than his wife is a predator. Tell him in a very firm manner that it bothers you to treat you that way. How would you feel if you were the wife. Most Latinos, Hispanics are not faithful especially if they are not Christians. Save yourself for another christian man, single men that is. There is nothing but heartache,and sin in just thinking about it. Keep running.

Answer 5

Your attraction is normal and nothing to feel bad about. You've done nothing wrong. His behavior sounds, simply, European to me. If you want to know if he is married, come right out and ask him. If he says yes, at least you will know. If he says no, and if you believe him, you can rightfully pursue a relationship with him if you are interested. If you don't believe him, sit at a table when you go to that sports bar and order your drinks from the cocktail waitress. Or find another bar.

Answer 6

You should not feel horrible if you are attracted to him, we are all human after all. Have you asked him if he was seeing anyone?? What about his friends?? Do any women stop in just to talk to him about things that are not related to work? Does he try to learn English so the two of you can communicate? ( I am a Mexican who is bilingual and think it would just be a lot easier for him to for his own sake ) Do you know anyone who speaks Spanish and could ask him directly or maybe even overhear conversation if he is?? Good Luck and if he is not the one I know there are even hotter guys out there for you.

Answer 7

You need to be careful in a situation like that. Alot of mexicans and even some puerto ricans, come to the mainland to work and leave their wife and family back home. It is not uncommon for their girlfriend to rudely discover that their boyfriend is much older than they said they were and have a wife and family they didn't know about.

Answer 8

i believe in soulmates...or at least a deep connection between people. maybe he hasn't felt this way about anyone before so he's indulging in this with you.

i mean some people find their soulmates after several relationships.

but yet, i can't speak for him and say this is real for him or just a passing moment. maybe you should have a talk with him, find things out from his perspective. you'll feel much better instead of all this guessing.

Answer 9

obviously he is attracted to you. there are several rules of conduct while at work that he breached. take him aside and speak why he is doing this,while having a witness somewhere in the background. perhaps he is about had it with his present marriage. sounds as if you are unknowingly provoking his come-on with your body language or manner of dress. If you feel chemistry between the both of you then follow through and have him take the steps to end marriage if both of you are committed and love each other. He can also be checking to see if you are wanting to be promiscuous, if so have him lighten up and tell him its a no go as he is married. good luck!

Answer 10

Hi girl,
I don,t like the way your story sounds,you better becareful.there is no way you can find the truth about him and nothing tells you he is gonna be honest if you ask him.I suggest you keep your heart for another sweet guy.


PS:i don't understand why you allow everybody to pinches your sides!