how do you even begin to swallow something like that. how was i not good enough.
2006-09-04 17:41:37 · 34 answers · asked by Me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This is one of those very painful learning experiences that you need to learn from and move on.
Instead of torturing yourself about believing it was your fault - realizt the truth - he has major character flaws. He cheated on you (and will likely cheat on subsequent partners). He hurt you (and will likely hurt other partners). He is the one with the problems and you cannot blame yourself for his actions.
Keep in mind that his actions do not represent the majority of men in this world. There are a lot of good, caring, loving and DEVOTED men out there who will treat you with the love and committment that you deserve.
It all starts with good, open communication. You both need to be able to talk to with each other openly and honestly about any issue. You need to trust each other and respect each other in conversation and in action. If you can accomplish this (as many successful couples have) then you will greatly reduce the chances of having another man cheat on you again.
I wish you a quick recovery from the broken heart and I wish you all the best!
2006-09-04 17:50:46 · answer #1 · answered by mgctouch 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, there are details that are not known. When you got together did you show interest in him 1st or him to you? How long was it before he got a between the sheets mambo with you? If you pursued him and gave it up to him fairly quick and did not make him work for it. He was was most likely NEVER vested in the relationship anyhow. For him it was just a source or reliable sex(which had to be good because he stuck around). It wasn't that you were not good enough. You did not do a good enough job to show him that it was worth all his lunch money plus any he could raise by selling off his video games and collecting bottles. If it was no more effort than spending half his allowance, so to speak, what value did he see from that? You short changed yourself. He just used it to his advantage. Next time make him earn it.
2006-09-04 17:55:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awww..... hunny its gonna be hard but you need to remember that you arent the one who did something wrong. What he did was cowardly and mean. He is the bad person in this. If he wasnt interested in you he should have told you. He is probably in the asshole phase where he wants his cake and too eat it too. I say you get a hold of the girl if she doesnt know about you and then you both dump his ***. Then he will really regret hurting either of you. One day the right guy will come around who isnt into playing games and will treat you right.. and as far as him I am a firm believer in Karma and he will get his hunny!
it takes time for the hurt to go away but in a few month or maybe less you will feel better.. go out get dressed up so you can remind yourself just how desirable you are!!
good luck dear!
2006-09-04 17:48:33 · answer #3 · answered by www.myspace.com/yourmomentofjen 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
GIRL!!! Some men are just cheaters. They are unable to commit to a woman, and often not able to commit in other aspects of life. Don't feel like you were not good enough for him. He was just disrespectful and should have told you. Also don't feel dumb ot naive because you had no clue....he was probably really good at lying and covering his a**. Believe me he has had experience doing this before if he got away with this that long. You probably loved him and trusted him and your heart nor soul would allow you to think he would do that to you! PLEASE don't dwell and absolutely don't take him back. He plain and simple don't love you ar have respect for you as a person. TAKE CARE
2006-09-04 17:50:16 · answer #4 · answered by kari 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I completely understand where you're coming from. When you give yourself to someone you love and trust and they break your heart like you meant nothing, it can knock a woman to her knees. Try taking time out of the dating game. Try going out and just hanging out with a million different men. I'm not saying have sex with all of them, just let them all show you what you're looking for in a guy. They don't ALL cheat, despite what everyone wants to say. And some of them will even stop their cheating ways if they really love a woman. It just depends on how much they have matured. It gets better, trust me.
2006-09-04 18:29:37 · answer #5 · answered by rawkinpunkbabie86 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The question is why was he not good enough for you. Do not put the blame on yourself for him being unfaithful. You are to good of a person to believe that sort of thing. Even if you were the type to withhold sex and nagged him everyday that does not give a man an excuse to cheat. Move on and get him out of your life and walk away strong.
2006-09-04 17:45:14 · answer #6 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Mak
Don't look at it from the 'I'm not good enough'. I've noticed that attitude on some friends that were cheated on. Have more trust on yourself (and none on him).
He cheated on you probably because he wanted more easy thrills. Probably, the girl he used to cheat on you was more easy, not better. And that's a whole different story.
Good luck, and I hope you forget him soon..
2006-09-04 17:46:44 · answer #7 · answered by Roberto 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if he was cheating for 6 months and you stayed with him, you got what you deserved. the first time you found out you should have hit the road and never looked back. and for not being good enough, you should tink he is not good enough for you and did you a favor so now you can find some one that worthy of you!!!!!!!
2006-09-04 17:47:16 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's nothing to do with you being 'good enough'. Tons of guys have been known to have affairs with girls uglier not as good a personality as their legitimate partner. He probably didn't even mean to hurt you. Male desire for sex is built in like a hunger. Sometimes doesn't much matter who is feeding them as long as they are getting fed. Not an excuse jsut trying to show you another perspective.
No matter how you do it I hope you have a happy life. Sorry on behalf of the male species.
2006-09-04 17:45:30 · answer #9 · answered by teef_au 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
By just moving on. If he was cheating on you for 6 months and you didn't notice it, you didn't want to noticei. So now is the time to just noticeYOU.
2006-09-04 17:46:46 · answer #10 · answered by Ellen J 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋