how can i learn to listen?

Question

i find myself talking about myself too much, how can i listen more?

Answer 1

simply shut up and do it. you dont have to babble all the time.

Answer 2

Real listening is an active process that has three basic steps.

Hearing.

Hearing just means listening enough to catch what the speaker is saying. For example, say you were listening to a report on zebras, and the speaker mentioned that no two are alike. If you can repeat the fact, then you have heard what has been said.

Understanding.

The next part of listening happens when you take what you have heard and understand it in your own way. Let's go back to that report on zebras. When you hear that no two are alike, think about what that might mean. You might think, "Maybe this means that the pattern of stripes is different for each zebra."

Judging.

After you are sure you understand what the speaker has said, think about whether it makes sense. Do you believe what you have heard? You might think, "How could the stripes to be different for every zebra? But then again, the fingerprints are different for every person. I think this seems believable."

Tips for being a good listener

Give your full attention on the person who is speaking. Don't look out the window or at what else is going on in the room.

Make sure your mind is focused, too. It can be easy to let your mind wander if you think you know what the person is going to say next, but you might be wrong! If you feel your mind wandering, change the position of your body and try to concentrate on the speaker's words.

Let the speaker finish before you begin to talk. Speakers appreciate having the chance to say everything they would like to say without being interrupted. When you interrupt, it looks like you aren't listening, even if you really are.

Let yourself finish listening before you begin to speak! You can't really listen if you are busy thinking about what you want say next.

Listen for main ideas. The main ideas are the most important points the speaker wants to get across. They may be mentioned at the start or end of a talk, and repeated a number of times. Pay special attention to statements that begin with phrases such as "My point is..." or "The thing to remember is..."

Ask questions. If you are not sure you understand what the speaker has said, just ask. It is a good idea to repeat in your own words what the speaker said so that you can be sure your understanding is correct. For example, you might say, "When you said that no two zebras are alike, did you mean that the stripes are different on each one?"

Give feedback. Sit up straight and look directly at the speaker. Now and then, nod to show that you understand. At appropriate points you may also smile, frown, laugh, or be silent. These are all ways to let the speaker know that you are really listening. Remember, you listen with your face as well as your ears!

Thinking fast
Remember: time is on your side! Thoughts move about four times as fast as speech. With practice, while you are listening you will also be able to think about what you are hearing, really understand it, and give feedback to the speaker.

Hope this helps as their is nothing worse than listening to someone that is self-centred, becomes verrrry boring.

Answer 3

You first must stop thinking about yourself and trying to relate everything the person is saying as some reflection, inspiration, or justification for your morals, thoughts, appearance, financial status, etc.

Next, as the person is talking and then finishes...don't think about responding, let it settle in and connect what just came out of the person's mouth to them as a person. Then, try to say something to encourage that person to continue getting their view/communication across. You'll walk away feeling more of yourself without saying much about yourself.

It will seem hard at first but try it for a while.

P.S. If that is too hard...then if you find yourself talking about yourself...immediately connect what you are talking to yourself and redirect it into talking about the other person or a way to make the other person feel they were are involved in the communication process and not just a sounding wall.

(Example (Say you are talking about your weekend and the great big fish you caught......."uh oh your talking about yourself again" ....so ask the person your talking to if they have ever been fishing. If they say yes, they ask then where, etc. "If you start talking about where you been fishing without them asking, then you screwed up again" but it's not too late because you just caught yourself so just apologize for interrupting and ask then to elaborate......then intergrate my first example and so on.............

Answer 4

Shut Up. Only ask questions about the person your talking to. Just don't listen try to hear what their really saying.

Answer 5

study the effective listening in communication.

speaking and listening play major parts in our lives and has a greater parts in our communication.

communication is useless if effective listening is not realized!!!

Listening is technically the conssciuos effort to hear or the process of attending closely to be able to hear or to be heard by meaningfully combining the results of what you hears, understands, and rememders..

Answer 6

First, good that you recognize that about yourself. Many people never do sadly.
First, the person who you are conversing with is interesting. (whether they are or not) Ask questions that build on what they have said. They talk about their pet- ask the name, where they came up with the name, the breed- you heard that such and such make good pets- etc...
Second, reply to them using part of what they said-
Keep your comments about YOU to a MINIMUM. Concentrate on that.

Answer 7

it's been my experience that if i repeat throughout the conversation what the other person is saying, it helps me to listen

Answer 8

when u start to listen more to others,u can learn from other's mistakes or experiences n become a better person,so its always gd to be a listener

try to let others finish wat they want to voice out before u start enjoying ur speech,gd luck :)

Answer 9

Start caring more about other people and what they have to say. Hugs! Von!

Answer 10

I've found that that is one of the many uses for duct tape. =)