I had a really bad day today. Do you have a good joke or something? First person to make me laugh gets the points!
2006-09-04 15:11:05 · 19 answers · asked by Kajunfriend2006 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
A man is traveling the country and he stops by an old Mom and Pop store,he goes in to get a drink and notices a jar full of money on the counter,he asks the store owner "What's with the jar?" Well says the owner,if you do three things I have wrote on the jar ,you get to keep all the money.So the man goes to read the 3 things and finds that 1st he has to drink 3 fifths of Tequila.Next he has to fight a big dog ,then he has to have sex with a 93 year old woman.He ponders this for a moment and then decides he'll do it.He asks the owner for the liquor and quickly drinks it down.With a bleary eye he asks the owner to point him to the dog.He goes in the room and instantly you can hear snarling and growling and yelping.This goes on for a 5 minutes then all goes quiet as the man comes out and asks"Now where is that old woman I'm supposed to FIGHT? Ba bomp bomp....
2006-09-04 15:21:49 · answer #1 · answered by hippiegirl672003 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Goochie goochiie gooo... ahhhh ba ba ba ba....
meeewww... mew! mew! Mew...
ahem... I'm sorry, I'm being insensitive. You are having a bad day.
Your boss is gay! How dare he treat you like that.
I told you that b@tch was crazy.
Men are dogs!
Okay now? Okay back to where we were.
WOoooooooooOOOOooooooOOOOOOOoooooo.
*Rinng riingg....
Momo?
Sorry, Momo is not availible right now. Can I take a message?
Yeah, can you just tell her that....WAhhh! BOooooooolooooooooooga. Balloooooooooooogggaaa.
Umm.. okay... and you are her...?
Best friend. We have so much in common. She and I. People say we act just the same. *raspberry blow*
Alright, well.. I'll let Mr. Stevens you called know right after she finishes her job interview with him.
Hey, Shanks a lot. Don't forget to floss.
Uhh.. alright goodbye.
Tsai Chiang. Asta la vista. Bon Voyage. Sianara. Toyota!
*Click*
Bye...
2006-09-04 22:29:50 · answer #2 · answered by Ilooklikemyavatar..exactly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
An elderly couple was driving across the country. While the woman was behind the wheel, the couple was pulled over by the highway patrol.
"Ma'am, did you know you were speeding?" the officer said.
The woman, hard of hearing, turned to her husband and asked, "What did he say?"
"He said you were speeding!" the old man yelled.
The patrolman then asked, "May I see your license?"
The woman turned to her husband again, "What did he say?"
The old man yelled back, "He wants to see your license!"
The woman then gave the officer her license.
"I see you are from Arkansas," the patrolman said. "I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the ugliest woman I've ever seen."
The woman turned to her husband again and asked, "What did he say?"
The old man replied, "He said he knows you!"
2006-09-04 22:13:46 · answer #3 · answered by nobody21 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a really worse day today. Do you have a good joke or something? First person to make me laugh gets the points! how pointless....
2006-09-04 22:12:57 · answer #4 · answered by love u like a fat kid loves cake 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Tickle,Tickle. Did that work?
A little boy is out for a walk with his Dad when they come across 2 dogs doing it. The son says Dad what are they doing? And the Dad tells him they're making puppies. Later that night the son walks in on Mom & Dad making love, and the son says Daddy what are you doing to Mommy? The Dad says we're making a baby. And the son says well turn her over I want Puppies.
2006-09-04 22:12:59 · answer #5 · answered by Myke BoDean 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Bagel.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yGn9Kqz4IL4
2006-09-04 22:12:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Three girls are sitting around, totally bored so one girl suggests that they make up nicknames for their ideal boyfriends and name them after soda pops.
"I want mine to be 7-Up, 'cause 7 days a week he's up."
"I want mine to be Mountain Dew 'cause when he's in between my mountains, we'll be doing it."
"Mine's gonna be Mikes Hard Lemonade."
"You can't do that. Here we are talking about soda pop and you're talking about a hard liquor."
"Exactly."
2006-09-04 22:59:55 · answer #7 · answered by Simply_Me 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
a pirate walks into a bar and has a steering wheel in his pants.
the bartender looks and him and says "why do you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says "arrrrrr there its driving me nuts."
Does that help you out any.
2006-09-04 22:14:43 · answer #8 · answered by morris 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I asked the 8 Ball and it said that is not possible.
Nano Nano.
2006-09-04 22:13:27 · answer #9 · answered by froggy010101 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Big Bro: That planet over there is Mars
Little Bro: So that other one must be Pa's!!!
2006-09-04 22:12:39 · answer #10 · answered by WORLD CLASS 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋