I have 2 older kids which are not his. The older kids go outside to play at a park behind my house & the two year old wants to follow. I am usually overwhelmed w/ housework while my b/f talks on the phone or watches tv. My 2 y.o wants to go outside & when I allow him to go with the older kids (7, 8 ),monitering him frequently my b/f watches from the window & criticizes everthing that happens wrong, then go to the door & scream at my kids and their friends about not watching the 2 y.o. My b/f then makes our two year old come in leaving me to deal with our 2 y.o crying & begging to go outside. I push my housework to the side & take our son outside.My older two are beginning to complain of their little brother b/c when they take him out my b/f is always screaming what they do wrong. My b/f and I argue all the time about this. I worry about how this effects the older two kids and my two year old who begs to me to go outside, but then dad yells no. What can I do?
2006-09-04 14:58:13 · 15 answers · asked by nene 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Don't worry so much about the housework. Take the little one outside.
One of the best quotes ever written," The sign of a great mother is a sticky floor and a dirty oven."
I'm not saying to never do housework, but spending alittle time outside with your child is necessary at this stage in his life.
Tell your bf to "kiss it" he sounds like he really needs to chill.
2006-09-04 15:53:21 · answer #1 · answered by mysweetbrees 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok first of all it sounds to me like you dont get alot of help at all from your boyfriend (if the children aren't his he will be reluctant to assist & if the youngest also isn't his you have very little hope of him helping at all) so this is my advice. I know it sounds really hard but try to make a time planner and include space for your children every day, after all they are yours and you do need to spend quality time with ALL of them, try not to make a big issue out of their play time though as this takes the fun out of it. Perhaps you could buy some toys they can play with in your own yard such as skipping ropes, balls, hoops and even a sand pit. if you take the time to go outside and count the jumps or help build a sandcastle you can help to educate your children at the same time and let the children see that you value them and enjoy spending time with them., go and play with them bugger the house work! organisation is the key to effective parenting. Trust me I have 3 kids too and i'm expecting another. Do your house work while the older kids are at school or get them involved it won't hurt them and it will help them develop skills they will need later in life. You could also try a system with your boyfriend that he help a bit more around the house or with the kids and then you'll have time to go and play, you need to consider what your prioritories are.
2006-09-04 23:01:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he isnt helping with the housework or the kids what do you need him for? 7 and 8 yr olds arent mature enough to be responsible for a 2 yr old dad should step up and go out and play with him or at least help with the housework so you can. i would tell him to do his part or take a hike. you got three kids to take care of as it is, you shouldnt have to worry about him too
2006-09-04 23:12:58 · answer #3 · answered by aarika 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well kids are only little once. Housework can wait. HAve fun playing with you children now because in a few years they won't want you around.
2006-09-04 22:02:56 · answer #4 · answered by mommysrock 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
okay my daughters father was the same way(you did catch that I did not say my boyfriend or husband right???) never had anything to do with her inside or out ..give him the alternative let him know he needs to be a part of the babies life or he need to go ......but be careful I did that and we broke up and he has not seen her in 4 months but that is okay he did not HELP when he was around
2006-09-08 12:24:10 · answer #5 · answered by thunder_rainclouds 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when you have kids and you're looking to be in a relationship with someone... you need to see how he is with the kids. if he's not that into them, he never will be and you should get rid of him. you need to find someone else that will love your kids as his own. your kids come first, and the whole idea about mothers who complain that they need a social life too. i think is a bunch of crap, because ur kids ARE your social life.. so think about that.
2006-09-05 09:39:34 · answer #6 · answered by MamiMe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TAke another look at the BF --- is he really good Dad material.
After all, it has been at least 3 years and he is still a BF, not more?
Kids come first.....
2006-09-04 22:02:34 · answer #7 · answered by mindeeathome 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd reconsider this BF. many men have problems raising their own kids then a BF who can not deal with this will cause harm to those kids emotionally and its not worth that!
2006-09-08 03:17:09 · answer #8 · answered by anjelahoy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him you need his help;he can take the kids to the park or do the housework i bet he will be taking the easy road and taking the kids to the park,he can help you it is his kid too right?
2006-09-04 22:02:52 · answer #9 · answered by happy-go-lucky 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Revaluate the relationship.
If you have to contact child protective services.
2006-09-04 22:04:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋