every night when he is at work he always call me to check if averything is ok,im tired of it ,it shaken me from bed i feel my heart jump everytime i wake from the phone ring.many times i told him that all is ok but still he keeps asking over if the fridge is close the faucet the door im getting crazy everytime he goes to work
2006-09-04 07:53:17 · 18 answers · asked by chloe 2 in Health ➔ Mental Health
You are describing symptoms of someone who worries excessively. I can't tell how much of a problem it may be in other parts of his life, but a person who needs to check on things constantly to make sure things are ok...is experiencing a type of obsessive compulsive anxiety disorder. No matter how much you try to calm him and tell him things are ok...if he can't get his head to calm down, you efforts are futile.
While I wish I could tell you that the problem will be easy to fix. It may not be.You may want to tell him calmly that his behaviors are unnecessary and bothersome but he isn't doing it because he wants too. He is calling you because he feels like something bad is going to happen if he doesn't make sure.
I am quite familiar with this disorder. I have lived it. I had a husband that had the same problem...just manifested a little different. While it is possible that this can be fixed with some cognitive therapy and recognition that he needs to overcome that urge to "make sure", it is possible that he has a serotonin disorder that needs treatment with medication.
Try not to get frustrated. Try to understand. And then get him some help. It is a disorder that can get worse, and already it is starting to drive you crazy.
You may be tempted to put ear plugs in...but that will make him worry more. He has a problem and it is something that is starting to affect you. Don't let it get out of hand.
2006-09-04 08:03:03 · answer #1 · answered by kishoti 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You have already been awakened a number of times so try this for a week. Just say, "Please stop calling at night. You wake me up and that bothers me. Everything else is fine." Then the next day tell him you know that he is trying to be helpful and be protective, but it seems to be working in the opposite direction. If that doesn't work, he has serious problems. Then you can use caller ID and not answer his calls unless you just want to turn your ringer off or unplug your phone. Towards the end of the first week I would tell him that you plan to do that if he can't control himself. [chances are he is the one who is having trouble and is lonel at night at work].
2006-09-04 08:09:23 · answer #2 · answered by DrB 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He just misses you and wants to hear your voice. Have you tried calling him before you go to sleep? That might help at least reduce the calls. If nothing else just tell him your exhausted and need some sleep, and that you'll call him again when you wake, or see him when he comes home, whichever comes first. It can be annoying at times, but at the same time it's sweet and shows he cares.
2006-09-04 08:01:08 · answer #3 · answered by hayaa_bi_taqwa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mine does this too. Take the phone off and go to bed. They need to learn how to make it alone without you with them all of the time. It's their problem. Like Ginger said above, call him and tell him you are o.k. and tell him you can't sleep when he keeps calling all the da^^n time. Zoloft sounds like a good med for him.
2006-09-04 08:47:43 · answer #4 · answered by Patty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you already told him not to call then tell him from now on you will not answer the phone in the middle of the night anymore beides the fact he is interrupting your sleep, and turn the ringer off
2006-09-04 08:04:21 · answer #5 · answered by bbt843 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
obsesive compolsive dissorder??? he may have left those things out of his "routine" once and now calling u to check has become another routine. tell him ur a woman not a machine, if hes so concerned come home and check for himself but for now on take the phone of the hook
2006-09-04 17:48:18 · answer #6 · answered by chlo_bo69 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is insecure and controlling. He feels the need to know what you are doing when he is not with you. Both of you go to a counselor before his behavior gets worse.
2006-09-04 08:00:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him what he's so afraid of. Don't answer any of his questions until he gives you an honest answer. If he's stubborn about it, hang up the phone. Keep doing this until he gets the message.
2006-09-04 12:17:39 · answer #8 · answered by tkron31 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unplug the phone. If he's so worried - he'll keep coming back fromwork. When he realises what a waste of time that is ... he may stop.
2006-09-04 07:55:34 · answer #9 · answered by july5_uk 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like your hubby has an OCD prob. and needs to go to the dr to see if this is the case and tell him to stop callling or turn off the ringer at night
2006-09-04 08:32:22 · answer #10 · answered by oceanlady580 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋