with everything that I have been thru with my parents I find it hard to love anymore.
2006-09-04 06:17:28 · 11 answers · asked by dark rockchick 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i know that without them I wouldn't be here but as a parent you have to do more than just give life.In the 25+ years I have been here i can count on one hand how many pleasant memories i'v had with them,
2006-09-04 06:19:08 · update #1
Love isn't a decision you make. Love isn't in the brain. Love doesn't depend on how they treat you. Love is unconditional and unjudgemental. You can dislike someone and still love them. Love doesn't mean letting them do whatever to you. Love means you are in a position to want what's best for someone else, no matter what. To love someone is to hold them dear in your heart even though they've caused pain. Love is not staying with an abuser, rather wanting what's best for that person, especially if it means walking away. You said you can count on one hand the number of happy times you've had with your parents. If you think love is only about the happy times, you're not knowing love's true meaning. Love can mean living through the most painful and evil things, but not letting go of the feeling in your heart that somewhere, buried deep inside the pain, is a spark that brightens your life. A spark takes a millisecond, and it may be the only one ever, but it's there. Love is about hope, and I hope that you find it in your heart to hope for the best for your parents. Being 25, it's time to let go. You are not going to get the apology you want.
Three questions:
Did your parents do you wrong? Yes!
Did you deserve it? No!
Is it time to get over it and move on? Yes!
It's time not to be miserable any more.
2006-09-04 06:35:06 · answer #1 · answered by Ice 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with you.
My dad, I'm on good terms with, really good terms. I love him and I appreciate him more, because I know soon that I'm going to lose him. But I despise him very much when he drinks, because he's just not the same person. He's aggressive and he's mean, he's stupid and arrgh, I dislike it a lot. I dislike how he gets upset and thinks that the only thing that seems to matter is work, but he hasn't done that so much of late.
I can tolerate my mother, and speak to her, but we usually argue a lot. I dislike her greatly, even hate her. She treats me poorly and acts like a huge child around me, arguing with me and stooping to levels even lower than I do. I get frustrated and shout at her sometimes, but she'll shout right back, things like "WHATEVER", and she just seems like a huge child. She refuses to get and keep a job, and she never believes ANYTHING I say to her, even though I've always told her the truth. Just, some things are really important I tell her, and she never believes me.
I can love my dad and appreciate him, maybe the fact that he's dying is enough to put it into perspective. But until my mother makes more of an effort to grow up and to stop being so cruel towards me, I don't think I'll ever get along with her.
I really hope you have better luck with your parents, though :(
2006-09-04 06:26:03 · answer #2 · answered by Little Girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hated my father until I was 20 and frankly, I just woke up one day and decided I wouldn't carry that chip on my shoulder anymore. And that's when I began seeing him for what he was, understood why he was the way he was and honestly, our parents are not perfect. They are human beings as well. They have their share of unhappiness and sorrow that sometimes get unloaded on us kids. I still dislike my dad but I no longer hate him. I'm sorry you feel that way about your parents but maybe take a step back and see them thru an adult pair of eyes and see them as people not as parents, maybe you'll understand what happened to them and why their unhappiness is rubbing off on you. Good luck, my prayers to you.
2006-09-04 06:26:31 · answer #3 · answered by Equinox 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am very sad to hear that you have such a bad relationship with your parents. I lost my father when I was only 11 and I think that makes me appreciate my mom even more. I had some bad experiences but I think that it only made me stronger. I still have fights with my mom but I also argue with my husband, children, boss, neighbours but it is like every relationship, you have to work on it.
2006-09-04 06:29:31 · answer #4 · answered by hermom 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I love my parents; each of them had a very bad parent. My father dealt with it by cutting the bastard out of his life. My mother dealt with it by trying to make her mother love her - for decades. It brought a lot of pain into our house, to watch our mom treated so badly. As she's gotten stronger, she's drawn stronger limits with her mother and hangs up the phone when her mom gets abusive.
2006-09-04 06:20:22 · answer #5 · answered by cassandra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dislike what they do or have done at times but I don't hate them..
I too was abused when younger but have put it behind me,I dislike them for it but don't hate them for it..Cuz I know I would be alot diffrent if they were diffrent.
2006-09-04 06:25:48 · answer #6 · answered by steve 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I love my parents and I don't know how you could say something like that!
2006-09-04 06:23:26 · answer #7 · answered by ♥ xx3 maddie x3 ♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dislike both my parents at times but then i love that at times but i know what you mean
2006-09-04 06:23:16 · answer #8 · answered by I_Love_You_13 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hate your parents for raising such a tuls !
2006-09-04 06:24:20 · answer #9 · answered by Jethro 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i hate my parents from time to time
2006-09-04 06:23:53 · answer #10 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋