I have a stash of condoms at home that my boyf and i have kept for emergencies as i'm on the pill such as when i'm on antibiotics or whatever, i found one was missing the other day, i mentioned it to him and he calmy just shrugged it off and said well it's not me i don't have the time and plus i love you, but i don't think it could be his sister as she would not know where they are and it is just not here, she is not sexually active anyway, plus when he does go out he does stay out all night sometimes and says he stays with one of the blokes from work he is with, sometimes i just get a bit suspicious, am i being a fool to believe he stays at these blokes houses or not? HELP!!!
2006-09-04 01:49:56 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
his usual reason for staying out all night is either that he is too drunk and that he is out around where he works and these people live nearer his work so it is easier to stay at thiers and go straight to work sat morning, i know this plausible but i just wish i knew these people and it always seems to be someone different, people that i have never even heard him talk about.
2006-09-04 02:17:06 · update #1
A womens intuition is a very strong thing that shouldnt be ignored. Usually there isnt smoke without fire so I think you should talk to him again about it. Also if you think it could be his sister why dont you ask her too at least then you will know one way or the other.
I hope he isnt cheating on you but if he is get rid of him quickly and move on with your life. Its his loss.
2006-09-04 01:53:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 6⤋
I'm sorry but I don't believe this bull about staying at a mates house just because it is nearer and easier. In no circumstances should you put up with this, tell him to get himself home on a night. No excuses, you want him home. I My husband and I have been together 12 years and we have only had 4 nights apart from each other, and that has been when I was in hospital having our children and another operation. Why would he want to go out on a night then go to work the next day and then not see you until that next night. Start talking to him, and tell him that you don't want him staying out. Put the romance back in your relationship but the main thing is that you must talk to each other, go out together, a trip to the cinema, walks, have sex in the car or in the woods, romance each other again, but don't put up with the fact that he stays out on a night, I don't care what anyone else says it DOES cause problems in marriages and relationships. Good Luck and be strong.
2006-09-04 16:25:49 · answer #2 · answered by radiant 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did he ever promise to only have sex with you? Too many women assume that having sex with them means no sex with anyone else. This is true only for a marriage or other contractual promise. Do not assume anything.
Assuming that you do have an exclusive relationship, first check with the sister. She may not be sexually active but just curious as to what a condom looks like or she could have had a friend who wanted one.
Once you eliminate all other possibilities, approach your boyfriend again. Tell him how much this is bugging you. If he denies taking it again, push by asking how he thinks it could have disappeared.
In any case you need to talk with your boyfriend again. If you are really this suspicious then he needs to know about your tending toward jealousy. If he did take it and lied to you about it, you need to find this out now and not later (perhaps when he doesn't take another one and has unprotected sex with someone else). Remember that for some guys "I love you" means "Open your legs."
If the two of you cannot speak to one another openly and honestly then perhaps you should not be in a relationship which is close enough for the two of you to be having sex.
Either trust him or end the relationship, but gather your data first.
2006-09-04 09:10:26 · answer #3 · answered by Richard 7 · 7⤊ 1⤋
You need to sort this out in your mind - otherwise you are going to go crazy. It is very destructive having this sort of suspicion round in your mind. It will blight your relationship unless you deal with it.
Staying out over night is a worrying trend, whether or not he is playing away, not least because no doubt you could do with a fun night out on Friday too.
I think you need a fundamental review of both your feelings and the relationship to see where it is going - but don't start by focusing on one "missing" condom because you may have miscounted your stash.
2006-09-04 09:47:57 · answer #4 · answered by Roadrunner 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm amazed that you keep that accurate and close of a count on your condoms. Wow. Please Lighten up. Any number of things could account for the "missing condom". Don't just automatically assume that he is cheating, unless you have other evidence of proof or fact. What if your boyfriend masturbated while wearing a condom to see how it felt? What if one dropped out of or behind your stash? Why accuse him IF you don't have any other proof or reason to be suspicious?? Again please lighten up, there are so many more bigger problems than a missing condom. They are not that outrageously expensive; just buy more.
2006-09-04 09:04:08 · answer #5 · answered by CuriousGirl 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If you have all these doubts about what your partner is telling you,then I think you should address the matter with him. If you do not like him staying out all night , then ask him to change his behaviour. Would he like it if you were out all night? You must not let these doubts though drive you to the point of jealousy as you may drive your partner away and after all he may be telling the truth.
2006-09-07 21:26:10 · answer #6 · answered by sioux 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First off he may have used it for masturbation purposes (Look it happens). Though it would be good if you could just check up on his mates he is staying with. If he is sleeping around he's just not worth having. Find out and put your mind to rest
2006-09-04 08:57:01 · answer #7 · answered by coldginuk 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
maybe you lost count on how many times sex happened, who knows, but if your into counting the condoms then you must not trust your boy freind and when told he has stayed at a friends house you again question it,
you might want to re-examine your relations withhim if you have all these pit falls
2006-09-04 08:56:16 · answer #8 · answered by free2chat_tou 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
give him the benefit of a doubt because he can be telling the truth and trust him he's not cheating on you when condoms are disappearing all the time that is when you start to worry and recheck them you could have simply counted them wrong
2006-09-04 08:55:16 · answer #9 · answered by Rivelle W 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You do say you have a stash. Does that mean you actually counted them prior to you noticing this. I would not worry
2006-09-04 08:55:10 · answer #10 · answered by jock 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why would he use one from the stash? wouldn't i be much easier and safer if he just bought new ones when he stays out all night?
2006-09-04 08:52:45 · answer #11 · answered by JoeP 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋