we had a fight on saturday and i was really drunk. i happened to hit her and now she's throwing me out. she says she doesn't know if we can make it through this but she'll try. how do i make this go away? should i leave and let her deal with this on her own? im getting help from all my friends and today i made an appointment with a councillor so she can help me. i don't know what to do, i love her very much and its hurting me that i hurt her so much. please help me get her back.
2006-09-04 01:24:07 · 22 answers · asked by sibulelof 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes you do have a problem here. you will be lucky if she ever trust you again.. If you can't control your self when drinking stop doing it.. because once starting this you men can't seem to keep your hands to yourself.. something is wrong with you that you would ever hit a woman.. i know i have been married to three people like you and they never changed.
One thing i can say for you if you are really doing it. is that you are getting counciling. your friends can't help you with this you have to want to help yourself.. And it is good she is throwing you out . I praise her for having the guts to deal with it.. most women don't .. they let things go until they are either hurt to bad or someone gets killed.. You are very lucky she said she would try.. try to include her in your counciling after you have been going for a few months. and Stop drinking you apparentlly can't handle it.. And watch your mouth also.. verbal abuse is as bad as the hitting part.. grow up.. reallly hope that you continue on with your counciling you may actually get the help that you need to be a normal person
2006-09-04 01:34:38 · answer #1 · answered by Sandy F 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Michael says so, I say so, you are toast. I've had quite a few lovers and a husband, and drunk or sober, none of them have hit me. I don't know why you did this. Maybe it's normal for your family. And, there are girls who like to be hit.
If you like this girl, stay away from her and work this out.
To get her back: the usual thing that works pretty well for most females is flowers, abject apology. "I was such as asshole, I'll never ever do this again" I love you more than anything" and no excuses ever: a big x through this: "You made me so mad that I couldn't help myself" no no no.
You can help yourself.
The idea is that you are the person who is protective, not the perp.
2006-09-04 08:34:25 · answer #2 · answered by annem k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a pretty tough thing to go through. I am sure she is struggling too. It is really up to you, the next step you take. Seeing a councilor and getting help from your friends is a step in the right direction and shows you care. Remember if you stay in this relationship that you can't forget your past. Someone who stays with someone who cheats, for instance, will never trust, and usually this is a target in any serious fight. The only way to move forward is to MOVE FORWARD. Never bring it up in a fight and put it behind you. Staying in this relationship will be tough, you made a huge mistake. But you can try. Good luck and never do that again!! :-)
2006-09-04 08:36:30 · answer #3 · answered by BostonSportsFan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't want to sound hard but listen to yourself.... you don't know what to do. It just happened that you hit her. She will try. You want it to go away. You are getting help from your friends. The councilors will help you. Everyone else must help you, and you are playing the marter> Come on. Stand on your feet and acknowledge that you got a problem and do something about it yourself. You got yourself into this %@$%. You took those drinks. You lifted your hand for her. No one else. Stand up and be a man. Throw away the booze, go on your knees and beg her forgiveness and if she still want you to go. Leave because you deserve it. Its hard, but at least you will learn a lesson out of this. Depend on no one else. When you create a mess, you must clean it up yourself.
2006-09-04 09:14:52 · answer #4 · answered by shapeshifter_phoenix 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to come to a couple of conclusions.....
1. You are not a happy drunk so you can't drink and have a relationship
2. No woman without serious problems is going to stick around and get hit.
3. Be a man and take what's coming to you. By staying sober and LIVING your promises maybe she will come back to you. Let her go for now.
2006-09-04 08:29:05 · answer #5 · answered by Olivia 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can't make it go away. Sometimes in life we do things we can't take back. Now you face the consequences of your actions.
I hope your counseling session goes well. In the meantime, yes, you should leave. You've already caused her enough emotional and physical pain, haven't you? If you're really sorry, then respect her wishes and GO.
2006-09-04 08:29:18 · answer #6 · answered by Avid 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You never ever hit a woman. I think she's doing the right thing by throwing you out.
2006-09-04 08:39:10 · answer #7 · answered by peterboro_first 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you say, "I happened to hit her". It sort of sounds like its no big deal to you. You sound like an abusive alcoholic and I don't blame her for kicking you out. You need to get into AA and work through all these mental issues that you have. She doesn't deserve an abusive alcoholic guy who yells at her when he doesn't get his way.
2006-09-04 08:30:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You crossed the line with hitting her. I suggest you abide by her wishes and apologize and see if she'll take you back once you show signs you are getting help.
2006-09-04 08:28:26 · answer #9 · answered by JoeP 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well..dude...all i could say is that...in the first place u shouldnt have hit her.....well now tht u've done it.....i think u need to give her some time off on her own.....you know....every person requires some breathing space....you just hav to let things sort themselves out.....believe me....if at all you both really "click" together...iam sure...you both will be back together again...all the best
2006-09-04 08:37:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anshuman C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋