in may i had been raped. so that was may. the guy moved far away and im pregnant. my mum doesnt want anything to do with me and my dad is pretty fed up. so i moved in with my dad, but hes never home and he can barely aford to pay for me let alone another being in the house hold. i wouldnt dare think up abortion because its against my religion. but when i asked about putting it up for adoption, my dad just stared at me and shook his head. i would keep it myself, but after just turning 14 in june, i dont thim im ready to take it on.
what should i do?
2006-09-03 16:03:17 · 13 answers · asked by x3perri 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
You are very mature to know that you aren't ready to raise a child. Adoption is a very good option and you need to sit your father down and talk to him about it. Your mother too, if possible. I am sorry to hear that your parents are upset with you for being raped, but rape is NEVER your fault and I think it's great that you are trying to do the best you can for this baby. If your parents won't help you come to the right decision, you might just have to make it yourself. Contact a pregnancy helpline for counseling in your options.
2006-09-03 16:10:30 · answer #1 · answered by S. O. 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think that you are being very sensible in choosing adoption for your baby. I am very sorry you were raped ...wish I could take away your pain. You are just a child your self and shouldn't have to take care of a child at that age. Look in the phone book for help in your area (either the DR or a place like Planned parent hood should be able to help you find an adoption agency) and have your Dad go with you to make sure everything is legal. There are homes for unwed mothers and they help place the babies after they are born. You could even have an open adoption that lets you visit and have pictures and get to know the family that adopts the baby.
~~Good Luck~~
Love & Light
2006-09-03 16:23:56 · answer #2 · answered by vtlovie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for your situation. It is very sensible of you to know that you are too young to raise a child. Adoption is a very wise choice and there are many people who would gladly take your child and raise it in a happy, healthy 2 parent home. My husband and I are in the process of adopting and I know that there are a lot of choices for a girl in your position. Many adoption agencies can even set it up for you to get help in paying for the prenatal care, and even some of your current living expenses. Look into some agencies and find out where you feel the right choice is. You are doing the right thing, giving the child a 2 parent home. You are a special person to do what you are talking about, I commend you! Try adoptions.com for help. Good luck and again, you are doing the right thing!
2006-09-03 16:38:54 · answer #3 · answered by 1 Supermom 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so so sorry that at such a young age you are having to deal with such a terrible thing. Honey you need to go and seek a professional to talk to. I give you big kudos for being able to come here and ask opinions and sometimes it is easier to talk to strangers than someone you know. I was adopted and I have 4 kids now of my own. Maybe explaining to your dad that you are just a kid yourself and now having a kid that it may not be the right time for you. You want you child to be able to be well taken care of and at 14 your just not able to do that the way you would like and even though he may not want you to do that you are thinking of him as well. I would check into what is called an open adoption. That is where you would have contact with the adoptive parents and be able to "keep tabs" on your child as He or She grows. You can request before papers are signed that they send you pictures and let you know how He or She is doing and when the time is right (age wise) having a meeting with you to meet Him or Her and explain who you are and what the situation was that you had to do what you did. There are alot of people out there that would love to have a baby that can't. Good Luck to you and I will pray for you!!!((((((HUGS)))))))
2006-09-03 16:20:21 · answer #4 · answered by wiazardofoz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good for you for realizing abortion is not the route to go! That's one that you'd regret for the rest of your life.
It's obvious neither you or your parents are able to cope with this baby... which leaves the adoption route. As hard as it is... you need to think of what would be best for this baby. It certainly wouldn't be fair to the baby or for you to bring it into this type of setting. You deserve a chance to be a teenager yet, which would be impossible while being responsible for this baby.
You say the guy moved far away? Is he a friend of yours? Did you report the rape to the police? He should be locked up!
Please check into a local adoption agency and/or the links below.
Feel free to IM or e-mail me by the same name at Yahoo. I'd love to chat with you further.
2006-09-03 16:39:19 · answer #5 · answered by ♫☼♥ ≈ Debbi ≈ ♥☼♫ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not your fault that you were raped.
You need to call an adoption place and tell them your situation. Look up adoption in the yellow pages.They will get you a place to live and pay all your bills and help your baby find a good home. You can do all of this without your parents.
2006-09-03 16:15:08 · answer #6 · answered by mrsleslie_lady 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I believe in Capital Punishment. With that said if you murder someone you deserve to be murdered.. If you are in a situation where you are raped and the father is not someone you were to spend the rest of your life with -- God will forgive you for aborting the pregnancy so long as it is done with the proper medical attention. I do not speak to God on a daily basis, but this is my sole opinion.
2006-09-03 16:46:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the idea of giving a baby up for adoption is very sensible and grown-up.
2006-09-03 16:08:54 · answer #8 · answered by BeamMeUpMom 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
talk to family , school counslers , anyone trustworthy , and remember adoption is a good thing , if you feel you are unable to handle a child , you did say you were 14 right , you still are a child , but best wishes.............
2006-09-05 17:13:47 · answer #9 · answered by sindi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have a serious talk with your Dad. But, it is ultimatley your decision.I would also recommend seeing a counselor of some sorts too.
2006-09-03 16:08:06 · answer #10 · answered by melashell 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋