the other night, my girlfriend and i went out and laid down with eachother and were making out a lot, we made a mistake , no we didnt have sex, but we both feel that we went to far and got to physical. we both agree that we dont need that in our relationship, but we had lost control and let our guard down. i really do love her, and i know i have messed up, and now i think our relationship has been jeopardized, and i dont want to lose her , she is my best friend. we've talked a lot about what happened and we have forgiven eachother , but she is still unsure of her feelings, she has told me she just needs some time , but i still get scared sometimes. i respect whatever decision she makes and i want what 's best for her. i want her to be happy so much, but through all this, she has had a really hard time. we still have a firm commmunication between us and love eachother. but things have been rough. i dont know what to do, how can i show her i really love her and care for her?
2006-09-03 15:33:47 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
give her the time that she needs. that's all you can do at this point. She is obviously feeling a little weak when it comes to what "almost" happened that night. the thing is, the situation got as far as it got because BOTH of you have strong feelings for each other. Both of you were involved in what happened (duh) and she is scared that if she spends time alone with you that it might happen again. after all, it is NOT a total imposibility...it happened once, if ya'll don't give each other enough time to cool off, it is likey to happen again. The best thing is to continue to support and respect her decision and let her cool off; you should be doing the same thing right now.
It is rather refreshing that ya'll are so mature about this whole thing. Believe me, sex is the last thing that you need right now. You need to worry more about school than about your hormones. I know it is easier said than done, especially when you are involved with someone.
She (and you) just need(s) time to cool off. good luck and God Bless
2006-09-03 15:41:20 · answer #1 · answered by one_sera_phim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like something I might have said when I was a teenager. Is she the last female on the face of the Earth? NO! Start dating now! Take it from a man that has dated dozens of women :D.
Start ignoring her now. Don't pay her any attention. Don't be a stupid sucker. If you really want to get with her, start dating other women. I didn't say have sex with them, just go to the movies and treat the other women nice. Sooner or later she will want you.
If not you will have these other girls to kick it with. It's a win-win situation for a real "Playa" especially with the internet. Back in my Grandfather's Day women were a "Dime a Dozen". After adjusting for inflation they are still about the same worth, at least most of them are.
However, if she was TRULY a special person she would not make you play games.
2006-09-03 15:42:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just try to be patient with her. Why don't you have a serious conversation with her and tell her exactly what you've said now.
Or perhaps try putting it in a letter and sending it with her favorite flowers or stuffed animal, or some other little token of affection that she will appreciate. Perhaps if you write it down on a paper, that she can take out and look at whenever she feels confused or has doubts, the letter will reassure her.
Another idea is to make a photo album showing all the things you love to do together or have done together, which don't involve sex. You love her and you love to do all these different things together, which don't involve becoming physical in that way.
2006-09-03 15:37:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i don't think its a mistake if you love each other, unless you're way way too young, but if she feels its too soon I've been there too when i was younger. give it a few days shell realize she enjoyed it and want to make out again. she probably just doesn't want to seem easy and that's good .this totally shouldn't jeopardize your relationship if you truly love each other. i ended up marrying the guy i did this with, and I'm still very much in live with him
were very happy. don't worry it'll all work out just don't ever hide your feelings of love for her even if it makes you look silly and she'll know and appreciate how much you love her.good luck
2006-09-03 15:45:39 · answer #4 · answered by L.A. WOMAN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey Buddy,
Sounds like you have a really nice girlfriend and you sound like a person who really cares about her. You are just having a hard time right now and things will be fine. If you two are looking out for each other the way you say. Just keep it up. Tell her or maybe let her read this letter you wrote to us and you will both be fine.
Glad to hear you and she love one another so much. Good luck.
2006-09-03 15:41:58 · answer #5 · answered by Oldguy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you wrote, "we BOTH feel that we went too far" I am wondering how that response really went down. Who FIRST expressed the feeling that you went too far? If YOU did, then you probably made her feel rejected. If SHE did, then you really don't think you went too far, do you? Be honest with yourself and be honest with her. Obviously she was attracted to you and thought of you in that way already or it wouldn't have happened. Sounds like you got insecure about it as soon as she expressed some doubts. You need to let her know you're comfortable with being close with her emotionally and physically or you're gonna reinforce whatever doubts she already has. And if you really love her and care for her don't worry about having to "show her" you really love her. Sounds like you just want to hit it again and want advice on how to repair the mess. Again my advice would be to be up front and honest about it all the way around.
2006-09-03 15:41:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's rough to claim without figuring out her but i can converse from my own experience. I went with a man when I was once 15 who was once 24. In the beginning he was rather fun and we might go to parties and hang around with his friends and cruise around making an attempt special areas to consume, seaside and so on. Then it started to get like all he wanted to do used to be make out - like duh he was once 24 however I being 15 didn't get it. I used to be just bored. I never had sex with the fellow and to be fair to him was mature watching at 15 but physically I just wasn't . I might have as an alternative gone to a film or play or simply performed than have my face all mushed to his. It felt sooooo boring to me. I didn't have intercourse until I was 21 and i am completely happy I waited. He was my first long term boyfriend. I wouldn't take it in my opinion. It's not relevant if you're not her first. Do you even understand if she wanted to be with the last guy or even though whatever occurred? Be her friend. Ask her questions with out pressuring her. If you happen to rather care about being along with her and now not just what you're getting out of it you are going to make an effort to be a friend rather than simply an extra needy egocentric guy.
2016-08-09 13:30:43 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send her flowers, take her out on nice dates, spend time just being best friends, you need to reconnect with her. Find the intimacy. If it is still bothering you, the whole going to far thing, then keep talking about it until it doesn't bother you anymore. You guys will get through this if you really care for each other.
2006-09-03 15:41:20 · answer #8 · answered by rascal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, u can do 2 things.. give her her space and just call her once to let her know ur still there and still loving her.. let her know u respect her decision. Or, u can send her flowers and a note saying how sorry u r and that u can both move on when ur ready.
2006-09-03 15:40:28 · answer #9 · answered by Bryana W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's not undemanding to assert devoid of understanding her yet i'm able to talk from my very very own journey. I went with a guy while i became 15 who became 24. in the initiating he became rather exciting and we would visit events and carry out along with his friends and cruise around attempting distinctive places to eat, sea coast etc. Then it began to get like each and every he wanted to do became make out - like duh he became 24 yet I being 15 did no longer get it. i became merely bored. I in no way had intercourse with the guy and to be honest to him became mature staring at 15 yet bodily I merely wasn't fascinated. i might have somewhat long previous to a action picture or play or merely performed than have my face all mushed to his. It felt sooooo uninteresting to me. i did no longer have intercourse until i became 21 and that i'm happy I waited. He became my first long term boyfriend. i does no longer take it individually. that's not appropriate while you're no longer her first. Do you even comprehend if she wanted to be with the final guy or whether something occurred? Be her pal. Ask her questions devoid of pressuring her. in case you rather care approximately being along with her and not purely what you're getting out of it you will take it sluggish to be a pal somewhat than merely yet another needy egocentric guy.
2016-09-30 07:51:27 · answer #10 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋