tell me a joke ,best one gets 10 pts.?

Answer 1

What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? You can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball.

Answer 2

i love you..
biggest joke ever told
The real joke


A newlywed couple returned to their apartment after being on their honeymoon.

"Care to go upstairs and do it?" the husband asked.

"Shh!" said the bride "All the neighbors will know what we're about to do. These walls are paper thin. In the future, we'll have to ask each other in code. For example, how about asking, 'Have you left the washing machine door open' instead?"

So, the following night, the husband asks, "I don't suppose you left the washing machine door open, did you?"

"No, I definitely shut it," replied the wife who rolled over and fell asleep.

When she woke up however, she was feeling a little frisky herself and she nudged her husband and said, "I think I did leave the washing machine door open after all. Would you like to do some washing?"

"No, thanks," said the husband. "It was only a small load so I did it by hand."

Answer 3

Once I meet a blonde that was so stupid:
She tripped over a cordless phone
she tried to drown a fish
she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death
she asked for a dollar check at the dollar store
she thought a quarterback was a refund
she tried to put m&ms in alphabetical order
she stared at an orage juice for an hour `cause it said concentrate.

Answer 4

This is the scientifically proven funniest joke in the world! See what you think

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy takes out his phone and calls the emergency services.

He gasps: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says: "Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a gunshot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says: "OK, now what?"

Answer 5

Bubba was visiting New York City and needed to go to the emergency room. He heard the horror stories of waiting and waiting and waiting, so he decided to do something about it.

He went to an Army-Navy store and bought a camouflage shirt and pants. He then sewed on a couple patches which he grabbed from a download on the internet.

It was amazing how people left before him. He guessed they suddenly decided they weren't that sick after all.

Bubba's patches said: U.S. Border Patrol

Answer 6

once upon a time, there was a blonde driving her brand new sports car down the highway. A trucker sees this and motions for her to pull over. On the side of the road, the trucker pulls a piece of chalk out of his pocket and draws a circle on the ground. He then tells the blonde to stay inside the circle. The trucker puts the chalk away and takes out his pocket knife. He slashes all of the tires on the blonde's new sports car. When he turns around, he sees the blonde with a grin on her face. The trucker doesn't understand this, but walks to his truck to get a baseball bat. He brings it over to the sports car and crashes all of the windows open. When he turns around, the blonde is giggling. So, the trucker puts his bat away and takes out his pocket knife. He then slashes all the seats open. When he looks back to the blonde, she is laughing! This was annoying the trucker so much than he went back to his truck, grabbed a whole thing of gasoline, pours it all over the sports car, and lights it on fire. Proud of the explosion, the trucker looks back to the blonde. The blonde is now laughing histerically. Finally, the trucker asks why she keeps on laughing as he ruins her car. The blonde responds with "I stepped out of the circle four times when you weren't looking!"

Answer 7

you know in some countries girls must stay virgin till they get married. this girl tells her mom " mom what should I do, I am getting married tonight. I'm not a virgin." Mother says here what you should do. get an apple and make a hole in it and rub some ketchup inside it and put it inside you. when your husband have sex with you he will break the apple and he'd think it's your virginity. and when he see the ketchup in the dark he'd think it's blood.
She does what her mother told her and sure enough her husband thinks she was a virgin.
after husband falls sleep she takes the apple out and puts it on the night table. when she wakes up in the morning she sees her husband is eating the apple. she gets worried and calls her mom on the phone "MOM , he is eating the apple. I'm worried maybe he get sick."
her mom laughs " Don't worry. your father ate the whole watermelon and nothing happened to him.

Answer 8

My wife is so ugly when she bent down to pet her cat it turned out to be the hair on her legs.

I went to look for a used car and found my wife's dress in the back seat

What a childhood I had, why, when I took my first step, my old man tripped me!

When I was a kid I got no respect. The time I was kidnapped, and the kidnappers sent my parents a note they said, "We want five thousand dollars or you'll see your kid again."

I'm a bad lover. Once I caught a peeping tom booing me.

Answer 9

There are five fags in a hot tub, giving each other googley eyes and flirting. Suddenly, one of them notices a condom that's floated to the top of the water in the center of the hot tub. Soon, all of them notice and stare. Finally, one of them rolls his eyes and asks, "All right, who farted?"

Bad, I know, but those are the best kind, hehe!

Answer 10

A limbless man was lying on the beach. A chik walks past and asks "have you ever been hugged" he replies "no" so she hugs him.. little later on another girl walks past, she asks "have you ever been kissed" he replies "no" so she kisses him.. later on another chik walks past and asks"have you ever been f**ked?" he replies "no", she says "well, you're about to be when the tide come in"