Im 26 and married. Im not done having fun yet! Im not ready. When i say that people look at me weird. Should they?
2006-09-03 05:24:30 · 23 answers · asked by Baby Jack born 4/5/09 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Heck no! You're doing it right. Too many people have kids young because "it's the next step". Then they're hasseled and unhappy and overly concerned with all the things they didn't get to do and some even resent the kids. That does not lead to a happy family. Have your fun, that way, when YOU are ready to have kids, you can give them your full attention, not to mention the experiences you'll have to draw from to teach them. You'll be ready to enjoy and appreciate them rather than resent them from keeping you from doing what you want.
If others don't like it, too bad - they're not the ones facing a life-altering decision!
2006-09-03 05:33:36 · answer #1 · answered by yundo 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Then don't say it.
Are you weird to not want to have your life completely taken over by little dictators, when you don't feel ready? No. Of course not. It's sensible to know your own mind and base your decisions on that, not on what others think you should do.
But why discuss this with people? It's no one's business but yours and your husband's.
People are reacting to what sounds to them like a not very good reason (or trivial reason), when you say you aren't done having fun yet. That's why the funny looks.
If you are volunteering this information, then stop.
If you are answering questions from those other people (it's amazing how many people think they have the right to make everybody else's decisions for them, yet resent other people telling them what to do), don't answer their questions.
You have no obligation to answer questions simply because someone is rude enough to have asked.
"Kids? Oh, maybe some day; when I'm ready." -- at most. Or just change the subject.
Just keep repeating a non-answer over and over until they get bored with asking you.
Refuse to debate the issue.
(Do be careful about waiting too long. If you don't feel ready by late 30's, biology may make the decision for you. It's much harder to get pregnant in your forties, though you can adopt.)
2006-09-03 14:40:11 · answer #2 · answered by tehabwa 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No you're not weird. There's no strict rule that every one should be ready for having a child at the age of 20-25 or what so ever.
Don't worry honey you'll be ready in time (at least I hope so! ) besides your life and your fun isn't over when you have a child. Don't think of it as a stop to YOUR life because it's not. Having babies is such a wonderful experience and I don't exactly know how you look at it and what your point of view is but let me tell you that if you look at having babies like ending the life that you have fun in and enjoy; you're never gonna be ready but the fact is that it's going to be such a joyous journey when ever it happens.
And don't care about the people who look at you weird, they're not gonna take care of your babies for you and in no way it's any of their business what YOU want to do with YOUR life.
Good luck! :)
2006-09-03 12:41:53 · answer #3 · answered by Katy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't have a baby when you aren't ready. You will only bring yourself a great deal of heart ache and harm to that baby as well. Because you will resent that baby because he/she is here and you weren't ready to be a parent yet. If someone asks when you are going to have a baby say, we are trying, it just isn't working out yet. They don't need to know any more. My husband and I were married for over 2 years before our first blessing arrived. We were ready for her and ready to be parents, but we were also 35 and 40 when she came into our lives. I was told that I would never have children.
2006-09-03 14:48:58 · answer #4 · answered by mom of girls 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes you have that feeling but you are never really ready. Some people would look at you weird but i wouldn't worry about it everyone has different feelings you get scared and think my life is over but it isn't, you can still do things after the baby is here. but If you want to do things have someone watch the baby and you can still have fun. Or you can take the baby with you depending where you are going
2006-09-03 12:39:42 · answer #5 · answered by marshmellow 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No. You are the only one who knows when you are ready to give up your time etc and be a mom. Good for you for knowing that you still need time to be just you, too many women don't listen to themselves and have kids when they are not ready and then the kids are the ones who loose. Kids take a lot, if you're not ready to give, wait! It will make you the better mom in the end, if you choose to have them, remember, you don't HAVE to have kids. It's all up to you, stick to your guns and don't do it before you're ready!
2006-09-04 00:59:07 · answer #6 · answered by 1 Supermom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not weird at all, if you want to still enjoy your life then go ahead and do so.. You are still young and you still have plenty of time.
Having children is a big responsibilty and freedom is something that you will never have until they are grown up. By that time you will probably be in your 40's or 50's and then you can began to enjoy life. Take your time and have children when your ready.. (Good Luck)!!!
2006-09-03 15:43:06 · answer #7 · answered by Vicky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your decision when to have children. If you are not ready then you aren't ready. It is better for you to get all your fun out then have children. Cause if you don't, then you will want to be able to do things when you have them and not be able to for quite a while. And if you did, then you would be hurting the children by not focusing on them.
2006-09-03 14:44:24 · answer #8 · answered by Yooper chick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you aren't ready then your aren't ready. I applaud that you have a stand on this and you know what you want. I had my first child when I was 19 and although I love my kids dearly, there are times that I wish I would have waited.
2006-09-03 12:30:58 · answer #9 · answered by lilbitadevil 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hey there!! I am 29 and I am just right now ready. You will know when the time is right!!! Don't listed to others!! You know when you are ready and no one can decide that for you.
2006-09-03 12:47:00 · answer #10 · answered by ShanaJ 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋