this is kind of addressed to those with culture / tradition the same as the philippines. you see, filipinos stay with their parents unless they're getting married.
i'm 25. i mean, i don't wanna disappoint her. i love her so much. but i don't want her taking my happiness from me. ive talked to her about it but she insists her way (eventhough she says she KNOWS that im 25). what do i do?
2006-09-03 02:38:54 · 24 answers · asked by daydream13 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
matanda ka na and you should let your folks know that! and that you have the right to do the things you think are okay to you. you probably need to show them that you are responsible and that you will be a "good" girl if you know what i mean. come on, staying over his place? what are you going to do... play scrabble all night? your mom isn't that dumb. put yourself in her shoes too... she's apprehensive for you probably, mom's tend to be protective of their kids, even through adulthood.
but go... you are an adult and tell your mom to understand that, and your needs and wants may not always be congruent with her values, but she also needs to respect yours. mahirap gawin yan kung minsan, but once you get it done, you're free...
2006-09-03 02:57:33 · answer #1 · answered by Shangri-La 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You sound as though you are in a hurry. Why? Culture and tradition are not the problem. At age 25, you are an adult. What is your relationship with this boyfriend, and what is his and your goal for this relationship?
If you take the necessary steps to avoid pregnancy until you both are ready to legally support a child, then it is up to you. At age 25, you should have enough common sense to judge your own desires, and understand the consequences.
2006-09-03 02:52:40 · answer #2 · answered by Sentinel 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
ok. you are 25. what else is there to know? did she put you through college? are you making a good living? do you help with the expenses around the house? if the boyfriend kicks you out, are you going home again or can you afford your own place?
Maybe Momma is right and she is saying this to keep you from getting hurt like many of her Filipino friends got hurt when the American who promised to marry them suddenly left them high and dry in the PI.
2006-09-03 03:31:44 · answer #3 · answered by oldsoftee2001 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SHE MEANS WELL SHE HAS PROBABLY DONE THE SAME MISTAKE SHE IS TRYING TO AVOID YOU MAKING I HAVE REALIZED ALOT oF THE THINGS I DIDNT THINK MY MOM HAS GONE THRU if she didnt one our family members have and alot times her advice was good to the bone she o i know you mite want to sleep over his house but just wait till to see if he is going to be more than a boyfriend and more than a fiancee take it from me there is a difference between boyfriend and husband husband you will have your mom's blessing boyfriend she will object to everything u do and cause a wedge between what ever relationship u mite have with her u will lose it
2006-09-03 03:22:02 · answer #4 · answered by GISELA S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At the age of 25 yrs. you bascially should have control of your own life. You are not a baby and you should be able to spend the night with your boyfriend.
I understand that it is your tradition but at the age of 25 is a littel too old. You should talk to your mother and explain it too her that you are too old for that.
2006-09-03 02:43:08 · answer #5 · answered by Vicky 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I thought you were 13. You dont have to be phili to have that tradition. Americans believe in no sex before marriage too, its just that some dont follow it, but some do. If you are engaged, just wait a few more months, it will be more special that way and youll make your mom proud.
2006-09-03 02:42:58 · answer #6 · answered by circusdejojo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you do not want to disapoint her then do not sleep with your boyfriend. If you and he have a strong love for one another you can both wait until you are married. I understand that you are 25 but your mom is right, listen to her.
2006-09-03 05:13:29 · answer #7 · answered by morris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, why don't you just respect her decision? It's not as if you can't get to sleep over with your bf forever. I mean, you two do plan to marry someday, right? Just wait. Being fillial and respectful to parents are also part of your culture/tradition, isn't it?
2006-09-03 02:58:10 · answer #8 · answered by gummy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason why your mother won't let you sleepover at your boyfriend's house is she is probably afraid of losing you to someone who might take better care of you than she did, and she doesn't want to lose you, much less choose between her and your boyfriend.
Invite your boyfriend over to talk to your parents, and talk about the differences of your cultures and traditions.
2006-09-03 02:56:04 · answer #9 · answered by Louise Smith 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry to say, but at 25 you are still living at mom's and therefore have to abide by the rules she sets. If you choose to become an independent adult, you can set your own rules in your own home. Good luck!
2006-09-03 02:45:25 · answer #10 · answered by stacey a 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋