going and i'm really upset she's saying she doesn't know the details about it n thats why she won't let me go. but i told her to ask another mom and she says I DON"T WANT ANY BODY ELSES OPINION.. so its basically a no n i'm rly pissed what should i do? why won't she let me go?
2006-09-02 16:36:57 · 24 answers · asked by thousandsoulvictory 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Well- as hard as it is to believe, your parents know you well, and what they want you exposed to or participating in, and what you are ready for. Its hard to accept, and hard to understand, but parents have to make some tough decisions, and its not easy for them either. Believe it or not, most parents want you to have fun, see your friends, and want you to be happy. But sometimes what you want is not whats in your best interest at the time. Parents dont like to disappoint their kids- but sometimes it has to be done, because thats a parents job.
Remember, in trying to convince your parents to let you go to something, telling them another parent's decision is not a good idea. No mom or dad wants to hear what so and so's parents let them do. Usually, that makes a parent mad- because in the end, its not their job to worry about your friends, their number one prioroty in this world is you. If your friends parents let them go, that doesnt mean its ok- it just means they are not sharing the same concerns as yours, for whatever the reasons. You would do better to get more details about the place, or yikes... even tell your mom she can check the place out, rather than say all my friends moms let them go. That makes it worse.
While its hard to take right now, it really isnt the end of the world. You will not lose your friends just because you could not go out a couple of times to a nightclub. Try to find somewhere else that you and your friends can hang out, and ask them to join you there. Or ask your mom if you can have a sleep over with your friends, or what things she thinks is ok to do, and what age would be ok for something like that.
In not too many years you will be able to go to places like that and dance, etc. and believe me, after you've been there a bit, you will realize why your mom said no, and you will tire of it quickly.
2006-09-02 17:10:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's got a good point here. You don't want to hear this, but she loves you and only wants to know that you are safe. What a friend does, and what her parents think, aren't what is important here.
Have her call the place during off hours to speak to the manager. It won't get you there tonight, but maybe next weekend. She should find out about security, how they check for age, how strict they are about people leaving and coming back, how strict they are about overage customers, etc... The club manager, if it's a reputable one, will be more than happy to answer all of her questions.
Also suggest that she call the city/county commissioner, sheriff, licensing board, etc... to inquire about any complaints against the place. Do a web search with the place name and city for more information. They might have a lawsuit against them for something, you never know. Make sure she has the chance to have all knowledge to look at. If the club doesn't have a record of overage customers, serving alcohol, drug sales, fights, etc... then she will be happier knowing that the place you are going to is a clean environment.
2006-09-02 16:51:25 · answer #2 · answered by welches_grape_jelly 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
When I was 14, I went to one of those clubs, and it was way out of control. There were older kids, weird men lurking around, fights, smoking, alcohol, and sex... No place for a young girl! I have two children myself, and I will absolutely not allow them to go such a place when they come of age. Keep in mind, no matter how old you get, you are still your Mom's baby girl. She is the only person in your life that will truly put your best interest first. She is only trying to protect you from unneccessary trouble. Bottom line, she loves you enough to be the one you hate right now, as painful as that must be for her.
2006-09-02 18:32:25 · answer #3 · answered by Choochie Larue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you grow up you'll understand everything your parents do that right now, don't seem to make any sense. The reason she won't let you go is because she loves you too much. May not be what you wanted to hear but it's true. If something happend to you...she'd never forgive herself for letting you go. Don't worry though she'll give you more opportunities to get out and have fun but you gotta earn that right. It takes time she first has to believe that your trustworth and responsible enough to be out unsupervised by her. Trust me it doesn't make sense and it seems soooo unfair right now but believe me it's not the 1st party and it won't be the last....but now a days ppl get shot at parties and you're just to precious for your mom to risk it. But trust me it'll get better give it til about 16 she'll lighten up then but for now just enjoy the good life.
2006-09-02 17:23:02 · answer #4 · answered by TeeTeeLew 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were my daughter I would not let you go either, you are only 14. Get over it and forgive your mom and seeing is you can't go why don't you do something fun with your mom. Go to a movie, go bowling, go out for dinner, just the two of you. I know your mom would love that. Try it, you may just find it fun.
2006-09-03 05:32:14 · answer #5 · answered by morris 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My mom was like your mom.
There was a teen club called 'The Bull' where I grew up, and all 13,486,798 of my teen friends went. Except me.
I used to growl, groan and stomp at my parents.
By the time all of us entered college, 90% of my 'teen club' friends were either smoking, drugging, drinking, sexing, aborting, snorting, 'shooting', or whatever.
I was the only 'lame duck' in the group.
I came to realize that I was truly blessed, and that my mom really loved me to not let me go to all the stuff 'they' were.
I was too stupid to see this when I was 14.
I realized this when I was grown and married.
Your mom loves you.
Stop growling and stomping at your mom and hug her.
One day, you will appreciate what she is trying to do.
Trust me on this.
2006-09-02 17:07:48 · answer #6 · answered by NC_Pianist 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen...I'M 14 TOO! And even i understand that staying out at a night club at 11:30 p.m is dangerous, but of coarse that's because there's a maniac molester around my state. But usualy parents actually know best, I know it's freaky and it must be the end of the world or something.
2006-09-02 16:47:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
This is simple....she cares about you and worries about you.Nobody can tell her its OK if she doesnt feel its OK.I would suggest asking if you can go from 730 till 930.Then you seen your friends there and and its a start in showing to your Mom..."hey look mom i can take care of myself and think separately from my friends".This may help your Mom to learn to trust your judgement when you go out and maybe when you are 16 she will have enough trust in your judgement to let stay out later.
2006-09-02 17:42:15 · answer #8 · answered by mrsannman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mom is right. She needs to get the facts herself and not follow someone else opinion. Your mom is your parent and its her job to make sure you are safe. My daughter is 15 and I wouldn't let her go.
2006-09-02 17:08:24 · answer #9 · answered by Apple 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not the end of the world, you will have plenty of time to go to a night club, Mom is smart, and only want to protect you, so cool out, get good grades, and them she may change her mind.
2006-09-02 16:43:30 · answer #10 · answered by roseannetb@verizon.net 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋