My fiancee's mother is the most conniving, manipulating evil woman I have ever met. For over a year now I have let her bad mouth me to anyone who will listen for fear of causing friction but I have reached my boiling point!!!, I am excluded from family functions, they are refusing to attend the upcoming engagement party for my fiancee and I and are refusing to have any part in the wedding also. I have never been anything but nice, polite and sincere but I am at a loss at what to do to get her to stop with her immature behaviour. My fiancee always defends me but it falls on deaf ears I'm not sure what I can do???
2006-09-02 13:42:56 · 14 answers · asked by gypsywife2b 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Continue to do what you are doing. Include them, be nice and don't give them a reason to talk. Even though they still probably will. You will be the better in the long run. Watch the movie Monster in Law, it will make you laugh. Just be nice, you and your fiance move on with your marriage and enjoy life together. It will be his mothers loss. Not yours if she chooses not to participate or include you in family functions. Shame on her.
2006-09-02 14:00:56 · answer #1 · answered by RITA G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be happy your fiancee defends you. A lot of husbands wouldn't. I'd just stay away from her all the time except for on thanksgiving and christmas because those are family days even for the ones you dislike.
2006-09-02 13:51:48 · answer #2 · answered by shadowsonic2004 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel for you. Seriously. Been there, done that. She is probably just reacting to "losing" her child, in her own way. Sucks, huh? Talk to your fiancee, and make sure you are standing together on this one. It will either get better or worse after you get married, it's all about how and where you set the boundaries. My husband finally had to tell his mother, "Look, I married her, deal with it!!" She got even more pissed, but finally backed off. Good luck!
2006-09-02 13:50:49 · answer #3 · answered by nic_tammyscott 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The funny thing is I have a mother inlaw from hell. They thought I was quite and wouldn't say anything. I finally hit my boiling point and told everyone down to my sister inlaw that Was my friend before I met my husband. My inlaws go to church 5times a week. I told all of them that They can go to church 10 times a week and that wont save them from all the conaving and sinning they do. I even called them hipcrits and said when god comes to earth they are going to burn on earth instead of hell. My husband defends me, And it turned out to not pay her any attention. She now wants to be a mother inlaw. All I have to say move on with your life if she don't want to come let her miss it. In the end she will be hurt not you. Your husband has to make you happy not her.
2006-09-02 15:11:11 · answer #4 · answered by Precious1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't do anything about them. BUT you'd best have a serious heart to heart talk with your husband about how you are going to deal with this as a team. And if there isn't a joint plan, I'd be very, very leery of the deal. You don't just marry the person--the family comes along with it and blood is pretty thick.
2006-09-02 13:54:05 · answer #5 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was nearly in the same position you are in now. My fiance's mother absolutely hated me. We tried talking to her, going to visit her separately, but nothing worked. She finally got so bad that my fiance disowned her and even went so far as to change his last name so as not to be associated with her at all.
Your fiancee needs to do something NOW about how your future mother-in-law treats you. Good luck!
2006-09-02 13:50:17 · answer #6 · answered by Demon Doll 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Elope. Your fiancee should maintain his relationship with the family if he wants but I would stay away.
I have 1st hand knowledge on the subject- I have cut ties from my husbands family- it's been 12 glorious years! ;)
2006-09-02 13:49:52 · answer #7 · answered by Alison 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh how I feel for you!
I once had this very same problem and I ended up giving an ultimatum: 'Severe ties with the demons, or I sever all ties with you'.
He now sees none of them because of their manipulating ways.
2006-09-02 14:38:14 · answer #8 · answered by cheeky_beth_62 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move to the opposite side of the country right after the wedding.
2006-09-02 13:49:19 · answer #9 · answered by braningillespie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does she treat everyone this way? Or is it just you?
I think you'll find that none of this is going to get better after your wedding.
You need to think about whether you can take this treatment for the rest of your life and make decisions accordingly.
Good luck.
2006-09-02 13:52:49 · answer #10 · answered by gonefornow 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋